Symfony Profiler

Key	Value
provider	security.user.provider.concrete.app_user_provider
context	main
entry_point	App\Security\KbinAuthenticator
user_checker	App\Security\UserChecker
access_denied_handler	(none)
access_denied_url	(none)
authenticators	[`"two_factor" "remember_me" "App\Security\KbinAuthenticator" "App\Security\FacebookAuthenticator" "App\Security\GoogleAuthenticator" "App\Security\GithubAuthenticator" "App\Security\KeycloakAuthenticator"`]

Listener	Duration	Response
Symfony\Component\Security\Http\Firewall\ChannelListener {#723`-map: Symfony\Component\Security\Http\AccessMap {#722 …} -logger: Monolog\Logger {#783 …} -httpPort: 80 -httpsPort: 443`}	0.00 ms	(none)
Symfony\Component\Security\Http\Firewall\ContextListener {#706-tokenStorage: Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authentication\Token\Storage\TokenStorage {#1017 …} -sessionKey: "_security_main" -logger: Monolog\Logger {#783 …} -userProviders: Symfony\Component\DependencyInjection\Argument\RewindableGenerator {#705 …} -dispatcher: Symfony\Component\EventDispatcher\Debug\TraceableEventDispatcher {#747 …} -registered: false -trustResolver: Scheb\TwoFactorBundle\Security\Authentication\AuthenticationTrustResolver {#780 …} -sessionTrackerEnabler: Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authentication\Token\Storage\UsageTrackingTokenStorage::enableUsageTracking(): void {#703 …}}	0.14 ms	(none)
Symfony\Component\Security\Http\Firewall\AuthenticatorManagerListener {#584`-authenticatorManager: Symfony\Component\Security\Http\Authentication\AuthenticatorManager {#595 …}`}	0.00 ms	(none)
Scheb\TwoFactorBundle\Security\Http\Firewall\TwoFactorAccessListener {#582`-twoFactorFirewallConfig: Scheb\TwoFactorBundle\Security\TwoFactor\TwoFactorFirewallConfig {#842 …} -tokenStorage: Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authentication\Token\Storage\UsageTrackingTokenStorage {#1018 …} -twoFactorAccessDecider: Scheb\TwoFactorBundle\Security\Authorization\TwoFactorAccessDecider {#581 …}`}	0.04 ms	(none)
Symfony\Component\Security\Http\Firewall\AccessListener {#579`-tokenStorage: Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authentication\Token\Storage\UsageTrackingTokenStorage {#1018 …} -accessDecisionManager: Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authorization\TraceableAccessDecisionManager {#937 …} -map: Symfony\Component\Security\Http\AccessMap {#722 …}`}	0.01 ms	(none)
Symfony\Component\Security\Http\Firewall\LogoutListener {#786`-tokenStorage: Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authentication\Token\Storage\UsageTrackingTokenStorage {#1018 …} -options: [ "csrf_parameter" => "_csrf_token" "csrf_token_id" => "logout" "logout_path" => "app_logout" ] -httpUtils: Symfony\Component\Security\Http\HttpUtils {#841 …} -csrfTokenManager: Symfony\Component\Security\Csrf\CsrfTokenManager {#1015 …} -eventDispatcher: Symfony\Component\EventDispatcher\Debug\TraceableEventDispatcher {#747 …}`}	0.00 ms	(none)

#	Voter class
1	"Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authorization\Voter\AuthenticatedVoter"
2	"Scheb\TwoFactorBundle\Security\Authorization\Voter\TwoFactorInProgressVoter"
3	"Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authorization\Voter\RoleHierarchyVoter"
4	"Symfony\Component\Security\Core\Authorization\Voter\ExpressionVoter"
5	"App\Security\Voter\EntryCommentVoter"
6	"App\Security\Voter\EntryVoter"
7	"App\Security\Voter\MagazineVoter"
8	"App\Security\Voter\MessageThreadVoter"
9	"App\Security\Voter\MessageVoter"
10	"App\Security\Voter\NotificationVoter"
11	"App\Security\Voter\OAuth2UserConsentVoter"
12	"App\Security\Voter\PostCommentVoter"
13	"App\Security\Voter\PostVoter"
14	"App\Security\Voter\UserVoter"

1

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moderate

App\Entity\Entry {#230
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1873 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#193 …}
  +image: null
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "That-saucer-section-really-ties-the-ship-together"
  +title: "That saucer section really ties the ship together."
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/c785af95-6cb4-462c-8e18-056b187d49d1.jpeg"
  +body: "Thanks to distantsounds for the template."
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 7
  +favouriteCount: 164
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1710924884 {#184
    date: 2024-03-20 09:54:44.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#199 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1855 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1834 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1968 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1884 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1408 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26725
  -titleTs: "'realli':4 'saucer':2 'section':3 'ship':7 'tie':5 'togeth':8"
  -bodyTs: "'distantsound':3 'templat':6 'thank':1"
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704294778
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5248191"
  +editedAt: DateTimeImmutable @1710978813 {#249
    date: 2024-03-21 00:53:33.0 +01:00
  }
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704208378 {#190
    date: 2024-01-02 16:12:58.0 +01:00
  }
}

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App\Entity\Entry {#230
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1873 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#193 …}
  +image: null
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "That-saucer-section-really-ties-the-ship-together"
  +title: "That saucer section really ties the ship together."
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/c785af95-6cb4-462c-8e18-056b187d49d1.jpeg"
  +body: "Thanks to distantsounds for the template."
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 7
  +favouriteCount: 164
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1710924884 {#184
    date: 2024-03-20 09:54:44.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#199 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1855 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1834 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1968 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1884 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1408 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26725
  -titleTs: "'realli':4 'saucer':2 'section':3 'ship':7 'tie':5 'togeth':8"
  -bodyTs: "'distantsound':3 'templat':6 'thank':1"
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704294778
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5248191"
  +editedAt: DateTimeImmutable @1710978813 {#249
    date: 2024-03-21 00:53:33.0 +01:00
  }
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704208378 {#190
    date: 2024-01-02 16:12:58.0 +01:00
  }
}

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App\Entity\Entry {#230
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1873 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#193 …}
  +image: null
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "That-saucer-section-really-ties-the-ship-together"
  +title: "That saucer section really ties the ship together."
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/c785af95-6cb4-462c-8e18-056b187d49d1.jpeg"
  +body: "Thanks to distantsounds for the template."
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 7
  +favouriteCount: 164
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1710924884 {#184
    date: 2024-03-20 09:54:44.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#199 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1855 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1834 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1968 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1884 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1408 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26725
  -titleTs: "'realli':4 'saucer':2 'section':3 'ship':7 'tie':5 'togeth':8"
  -bodyTs: "'distantsound':3 'templat':6 'thank':1"
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704294778
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5248191"
  +editedAt: DateTimeImmutable @1710978813 {#249
    date: 2024-03-21 00:53:33.0 +01:00
  }
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704208378 {#190
    date: 2024-01-02 16:12:58.0 +01:00
  }
}

5

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App\Entity\Entry {#1877
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1920 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1925 …}
  +image: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Image {#1960 …}
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "Couldn-t-make-it-as-an-ottoman"
  +title: "*Couldn't make it as an ottoman*"
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/e35571e5-f5e8-4d92-b0ae-769d2b5168d9.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 12
  +favouriteCount: 229
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1711237499 {#1866
    date: 2024-03-24 00:44:59.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1954 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1928 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1974 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1967 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1937 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1943 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26717
  -titleTs: "'couldn':1 'make':3 'ottoman':7"
  -bodyTs: null
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704292575
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5247163"
  +editedAt: null
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704206175 {#1881
    date: 2024-01-02 15:36:15.0 +01:00
  }
}

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App\Entity\Entry {#1877
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1920 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1925 …}
  +image: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Image {#1960 …}
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "Couldn-t-make-it-as-an-ottoman"
  +title: "*Couldn't make it as an ottoman*"
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/e35571e5-f5e8-4d92-b0ae-769d2b5168d9.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 12
  +favouriteCount: 229
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1711237499 {#1866
    date: 2024-03-24 00:44:59.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1954 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1928 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1974 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1967 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1937 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1943 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26717
  -titleTs: "'couldn':1 'make':3 'ottoman':7"
  -bodyTs: null
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704292575
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5247163"
  +editedAt: null
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704206175 {#1881
    date: 2024-01-02 15:36:15.0 +01:00
  }
}

8

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App\Entity\Entry {#1877
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1920 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1925 …}
  +image: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Image {#1960 …}
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "Couldn-t-make-it-as-an-ottoman"
  +title: "*Couldn't make it as an ottoman*"
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/e35571e5-f5e8-4d92-b0ae-769d2b5168d9.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 12
  +favouriteCount: 229
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1711237499 {#1866
    date: 2024-03-24 00:44:59.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1954 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1928 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1974 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1967 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1937 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1943 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26717
  -titleTs: "'couldn':1 'make':3 'ottoman':7"
  -bodyTs: null
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704292575
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5247163"
  +editedAt: null
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704206175 {#1881
    date: 2024-01-02 15:36:15.0 +01:00
  }
}

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10

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moderate

App\Entity\Entry {#1961
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1920 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1934 …}
  +image: null
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "You-can-t-beat-him-at-this"
  +title: "You can't beat him at this."
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/f32bb92f-80e3-4f57-8c6a-c763cf9476ad.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 11
  +favouriteCount: 407
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1711105062 {#1978
    date: 2024-03-22 11:57:42.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1957 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1930 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1952 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1386 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1388 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1892 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26711
  -titleTs: "'beat':4"
  -bodyTs: null
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704291821
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5246979"
  +editedAt: DateTimeImmutable @1711085285 {#1973
    date: 2024-03-22 06:28:05.0 +01:00
  }
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704205421 {#1966
    date: 2024-01-02 15:23:41.0 +01:00
  }
}

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App\Entity\Entry {#1961
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1920 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1934 …}
  +image: null
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "You-can-t-beat-him-at-this"
  +title: "You can't beat him at this."
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/f32bb92f-80e3-4f57-8c6a-c763cf9476ad.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 11
  +favouriteCount: 407
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1711105062 {#1978
    date: 2024-03-22 11:57:42.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1957 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1930 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1952 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1386 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1388 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1892 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26711
  -titleTs: "'beat':4"
  -bodyTs: null
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704291821
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5246979"
  +editedAt: DateTimeImmutable @1711085285 {#1973
    date: 2024-03-22 06:28:05.0 +01:00
  }
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704205421 {#1966
    date: 2024-01-02 15:23:41.0 +01:00
  }
}

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App\Entity\Entry {#1961
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1920 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1934 …}
  +image: null
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1658 …}
  +slug: "You-can-t-beat-him-at-this"
  +title: "You can't beat him at this."
  +url: "https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/f32bb92f-80e3-4f57-8c6a-c763cf9476ad.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 11
  +favouriteCount: 407
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1711105062 {#1978
    date: 2024-03-22 11:57:42.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1957 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1930 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1952 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1386 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1388 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1892 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26711
  -titleTs: "'beat':4"
  -bodyTs: null
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704291821
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://startrek.website/post/5246979"
  +editedAt: DateTimeImmutable @1711085285 {#1973
    date: 2024-03-22 06:28:05.0 +01:00
  }
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704205421 {#1966
    date: 2024-01-02 15:23:41.0 +01:00
  }
}

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14

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moderate

App\Entity\Entry {#1935
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1364 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1392 …}
  +image: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Image {#1398 …}
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1393 …}
  +slug: "Steam-Boat-Willie-belongs-to-the-People"
  +title: "Steam Boat Willie belongs to the People!"
  +url: "https://lemmy.ml/pictrs/image/a61a9357-f52a-4bf5-90b8-b475389a50ee.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 5
  +favouriteCount: 973
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
  +lastActive: DateTime @1711023115 {#1890
    date: 2024-03-21 13:11:55.0 +01:00
  }
  +ip: null
  +adaAmount: 0
  +tags: null
  +mentions: null
  +comments: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1389 …}
  +votes: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1376 …}
  +reports: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1377 …}
  +favourites: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1969 …}
  +notifications: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1942 …}
  +badges: Doctrine\ORM\PersistentCollection {#1927 …}
  +children: []
  -id: 26707
  -titleTs: "'belong':4 'boat':2 'peopl':7 'steam':1 'willi':3"
  -bodyTs: null
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704290669
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://lemmy.ml/post/10030568"
  +editedAt: null
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704204269 {#1903
    date: 2024-01-02 15:04:29.0 +01:00
  }
}

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App\Entity\Entry {#1935
  +user: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\User {#1364 …}
  +magazine: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Magazine {#1392 …}
  +image: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Image {#1398 …}
  +domain: Proxies\__CG__\App\Entity\Domain {#1393 …}
  +slug: "Steam-Boat-Willie-belongs-to-the-People"
  +title: "Steam Boat Willie belongs to the People!"
  +url: "https://lemmy.ml/pictrs/image/a61a9357-f52a-4bf5-90b8-b475389a50ee.jpeg"
  +body: null
  +type: "image"
  +lang: "en"
  +isOc: false
  +hasEmbed: true
  +commentCount: 5
  +favouriteCount: 973
  +score: 0
  +isAdult: false
  +sticky: false
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  +slug: "Live-Fast-Die-Young-And-Leave-A-Greasy-Corpse-A"
  +title: "Live Fast, Die Young, And Leave A Greasy Corpse: A Review Of Greedo’s Story In Tales From The Mos Eisley Cantina"
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    The book *Tales The The Mos Eisley Cantina* is an anthology published in 1995. It covers the lives and times of the various characters we glimpsed inside the Mos Eisley in A New Hope.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/d94e445d-5922-45b3-ac82-83f841e26867.jpeg)\n
    \n
    One of the more notable figures was Greedo, the bounty hunter who tried and failed to take down Han Solo. Greedo’s story, titled *A Hunter’s Fate*, was co-written by Tom and Martha Veitch. Tom was a big figure in 1990s Star Wars EU, having started Star Wars expansion into comics with both *Tales Of The Jedi* and *Dark Empire*, so I was excited to see what his Greedo short story had in store.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/5bc70801-329a-4cf1-b667-06c40b59c2fa.jpeg)\n
    \n
    The story started with a young, just barely teenage Greedo living on a jungle world. He lived with his mother, brother, and a small group of other Rodians. It was an idyllic and peaceful life, but young Greedo often suspected that the adults were keeping secrets. And they were, because the truth was that Greedo came from a Rodian clan that was being hunted extinction by a rival clan which had taken power. It wasn’t long into the story that the enclave of Greedo’s people were found by the rival clan, with many of the hunted being killed and only a small number escaping again to the stars. Greedo, his mother, and brother were among the few of his clan who managed to escape again to the stars, and eventually settled on the planet of Nar Shaddaa. Nar Shaddaa was very different than the jungle Greedo had originally been raised on. It was an urban planet with a sprawl of buildings and landing pads stack atop each other, crime was rampant, and even the Empire’s ability to protect power was tenuous. Fast forward a few years and Greedo has become a young punk. Swiping swoop bikes, pickpocketing, and spitting off over overpasses. He fit right in with the juvenile delinquents of the planet, but he wanted more. One day he got the chance, as by happenstance, a pair of bounty hunters across his path were accosted by a third, known as Gorm, who was looking to settle a debt. The altercation turned violent and the pair were about to dissolved by the imposing Gorm when Greedo picked up fallen blaster and shot Gorm in the back. The stunned pair of bounty hunters took Greedo in, and one in particular, named Goa become Greedo’s new mentor in the business of bounty hunting. All of this made me sympathetic to Greedo, he had a life constantly upended and on the run. Ending up on a planet of crime, it was only natural he fell into becoming a criminal, and with a desire for greatness he was blinded into taking a career path of violence to get it.\n
    \n
    After that Greedo had a short run in with Han Solo, who embarrassed him by seeing right through Greedo’s subpar pickpocket skills. This set up Greedo to have a grudge on Solo. While I understand that Greedo and Solo do need some way of having known each other, since they recognized each other in the Mos Eisley cantina, I felt this exchange was a little bit clumsy. Of all the ship garages on Nar Shaddaa Greedo happens to hang out at the one where Solo comes to get his ship fixed, and then later Greedo goes to Tatootine completely independently of Solo, but happens to end up there at the same time. It was an instance that made the galaxy feel a bit too small.\n
    \n
    I quickly got over that when Greedo decided to go in for a big payday with his mentors. Greedo knew about a rebel cell that was operating out of the same hidden city level that his clan had taken refuge in. The Empire was paying big for information on rebel forces, and once Greedo turned it in, he got paid and the Empire sent in a strike force. However, the rebels were surprisingly well prepared. They had a ion field artillery gun waiting in a building, which fired and nearly instantly sunk the Imperial strike force landing ships. It was a great action scene. It appeared to be a total rebel victory, and a good feeling for the reader. The protagonist Greedo got a paycheck, and the Empire got whomped. The the Imperial spider walker showed it. It wasn’t named, but it had to be a massive MT-AT which has a double laser cannon atop each of its eight legs, and another laser cannon on its head. The Imperial walker didn’t bother trying to insert more troops to make a controlled sweep of the rebels, but fired alpha strikes to demolish the entire area.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/69c4aea0-647f-4227-8fbe-4f4e70d099bc.jpeg)\n
    \n
    Greedo watched from afar, knowing that his family lived on the same city level as the rebels. It had gone from a victory to a tragedy. Greedo didn’t know if he had caused his family’s death from that distance, and he had no time to check if they were alive or dead before his mentor Goa was rushing him to a starship. The bounty hunters were fleeing en masse before the agitated Empire started asking hard questions to Nar Shaddaa’s underbelly. Maybe Greedo’s family was alright, but it was probably better not to know.\n
    \n
    Greedo ended up on Tatooine, and eventually in front of Jabba who was offering various bounty contracts. One of them was for Han Solo, and Greedo eagerly took it. His mentor Goa seemed mildly reluctant for Greedo to go after such an infamous target for his first job, but was ultimately supportive after Greedo insisted. Goa had originally had thoughts about just scamming Greedo, but although he internally continued to say it was all he was doing, he was legitimately helping Greedo and watching his back. After Greedo had a few failed attempts at collecting the money Solo owed, he got Jabba to allow a hit on Solo instead. Greedo planned to finish the job. Inside the Mos Eisley cantina Greedo watched Solo as he negotiated with a pair of passengers. While he waited, Goa was seated with a pair of Rodians. This was their first appearance in the story and Greedo didn’t have time to react before his opening to corner Solo appeared.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/8f649e3d-9f33-44dc-a85a-b775bdca0a4f.jpeg)\n
    \n
    Goa watched from his table as Solo unholstered his blaster under the table. He could have jumped in, and perhaps would have jumped in if it were not for the two Rodians seated with him. Solo blasted Greedo. Goa left for the local spaceport and got his payment by the Rodians, who were of the clan that was hunting Greedo. They had the mission to see that Greedo died, and had paid Goa to ensure it happened. Goa took his payment, though finally admitted out loud he wasn’t proud of it. Kind of a heartbreaking story of a bounty hunting career cut short by quiet betrayal.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/f3e7b2a9-bdb0-4ec0-b8b2-7e3ec2797076.webp)\n
    \n
    And that’s the end of Greedo’s tale.\n
    \n
    Except.\n
    \n
    There’s another story in the book. The bartender’s story, titled *Be Still My Heart* by David Bischoff, and it adds just a little bit more. It follows, of course, the bartender, who is named Wuher. He is kind of a pathetic guy. He has a deep passion for bartending, and he wants to be taken seriously.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/e1bae978-7a64-4fba-b1c8-fd28cb8185cf.jpeg)\n
    \n
    It’s hard for a human to be taken as a proper bartender by many of myriad species, who think humans are incapable of tending to their palettes, but Wuher tries hard both to educate himself and to distill drinks in the basement of the cantina. He constantly gets verbal abuse simply for being a human bartender, and takes out his resentment on droids, the only beings around who are lower on the social totem pole than he is. Every day he keeps working, and his special project is to distill a liquor that will please Jabba the Hutt himself. If Wuher can make it as Jabba’s bartender, he will truly have proved himself. Wuher’s efforts keep getting close to what he imagines will be the perfect blend for Jabba, but they are always missing that proper x factor. That something that is pungent, earthy, and just a hair meaty. Something decadent to a Hutt.\n
    \n
    One day, in the early morning hours on his way to keep working on his liquor, Wuher was stopped in an alley by a droid. It was called C2-R4. It was a small droid roughly based on the body style of an astromech, but with a bewildering number of parts allowing it to perform catalytic fuel conversion, enzymatic composition breakdown, bacterial composting acceleration, and chemical diagnostic programming as well as meal preparation, toaster oven, bang-corn air-popper, and blender.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/ebd3f8cb-33a4-43e2-bf67-cfd6281b645d.webp)\n
    \n
    Wuher kicked the droid away and went on to work. Wuher tended bar and watched as Greedo was shot through by Han Solo’s blaster. Seeing that sight changed something in him, and he rushed back to save that droid he had seen earlier. Wuher had decided to change his ways. No longer rejecting and discriminating against all droids, he brought little C2-R4 into the safety of his basement. He had seen the light. Because C2-R4 could break down organic material, which made it perfect for breaking down pieces of Greedo’s greasy, earthy, oily corpse and concentrating it into an enzyme that Wuher added to his liquor to produce the final touch for the perfect liquor for Jabba. Right about the same time Luke and Han were getting their medals for blowing up the Death Star, Greedo’s severed head was hanging in the bioalchemical alcove over a celebrating Wuher.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/0e02f48e-a38a-4415-8859-adf5357c4ed4.webp)\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/1e393a46-178b-497a-afa5-56612bea6cfd.jpeg)\n
    \n
    And that’s the real end of Greedo.\n
    \n
    That’s a lot to process. I liked both stories put together. The first did leave me sad, and the second, well its been a week and I still don’t know if I can articulate what I feel, but it is quite an unexpected post script to the short career of Greedo. Star Wars can go to some dark places, but still end up enthralling.\n
    \n
    This post is also an [article on my blog,](https://scratch-that.org/2024/01/01/live-fast-die-young-and-leave-a-greasy-corpse-a-review-of-greedos-story-in-tales-from-the-mos-eisley-cantina/) where I’ve got lots of other stuff too.
    """
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  +slug: "Live-Fast-Die-Young-And-Leave-A-Greasy-Corpse-A"
  +title: "Live Fast, Die Young, And Leave A Greasy Corpse: A Review Of Greedo’s Story In Tales From The Mos Eisley Cantina"
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    The book *Tales The The Mos Eisley Cantina* is an anthology published in 1995. It covers the lives and times of the various characters we glimpsed inside the Mos Eisley in A New Hope.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/d94e445d-5922-45b3-ac82-83f841e26867.jpeg)\n
    \n
    One of the more notable figures was Greedo, the bounty hunter who tried and failed to take down Han Solo. Greedo’s story, titled *A Hunter’s Fate*, was co-written by Tom and Martha Veitch. Tom was a big figure in 1990s Star Wars EU, having started Star Wars expansion into comics with both *Tales Of The Jedi* and *Dark Empire*, so I was excited to see what his Greedo short story had in store.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/5bc70801-329a-4cf1-b667-06c40b59c2fa.jpeg)\n
    \n
    The story started with a young, just barely teenage Greedo living on a jungle world. He lived with his mother, brother, and a small group of other Rodians. It was an idyllic and peaceful life, but young Greedo often suspected that the adults were keeping secrets. And they were, because the truth was that Greedo came from a Rodian clan that was being hunted extinction by a rival clan which had taken power. It wasn’t long into the story that the enclave of Greedo’s people were found by the rival clan, with many of the hunted being killed and only a small number escaping again to the stars. Greedo, his mother, and brother were among the few of his clan who managed to escape again to the stars, and eventually settled on the planet of Nar Shaddaa. Nar Shaddaa was very different than the jungle Greedo had originally been raised on. It was an urban planet with a sprawl of buildings and landing pads stack atop each other, crime was rampant, and even the Empire’s ability to protect power was tenuous. Fast forward a few years and Greedo has become a young punk. Swiping swoop bikes, pickpocketing, and spitting off over overpasses. He fit right in with the juvenile delinquents of the planet, but he wanted more. One day he got the chance, as by happenstance, a pair of bounty hunters across his path were accosted by a third, known as Gorm, who was looking to settle a debt. The altercation turned violent and the pair were about to dissolved by the imposing Gorm when Greedo picked up fallen blaster and shot Gorm in the back. The stunned pair of bounty hunters took Greedo in, and one in particular, named Goa become Greedo’s new mentor in the business of bounty hunting. All of this made me sympathetic to Greedo, he had a life constantly upended and on the run. Ending up on a planet of crime, it was only natural he fell into becoming a criminal, and with a desire for greatness he was blinded into taking a career path of violence to get it.\n
    \n
    After that Greedo had a short run in with Han Solo, who embarrassed him by seeing right through Greedo’s subpar pickpocket skills. This set up Greedo to have a grudge on Solo. While I understand that Greedo and Solo do need some way of having known each other, since they recognized each other in the Mos Eisley cantina, I felt this exchange was a little bit clumsy. Of all the ship garages on Nar Shaddaa Greedo happens to hang out at the one where Solo comes to get his ship fixed, and then later Greedo goes to Tatootine completely independently of Solo, but happens to end up there at the same time. It was an instance that made the galaxy feel a bit too small.\n
    \n
    I quickly got over that when Greedo decided to go in for a big payday with his mentors. Greedo knew about a rebel cell that was operating out of the same hidden city level that his clan had taken refuge in. The Empire was paying big for information on rebel forces, and once Greedo turned it in, he got paid and the Empire sent in a strike force. However, the rebels were surprisingly well prepared. They had a ion field artillery gun waiting in a building, which fired and nearly instantly sunk the Imperial strike force landing ships. It was a great action scene. It appeared to be a total rebel victory, and a good feeling for the reader. The protagonist Greedo got a paycheck, and the Empire got whomped. The the Imperial spider walker showed it. It wasn’t named, but it had to be a massive MT-AT which has a double laser cannon atop each of its eight legs, and another laser cannon on its head. The Imperial walker didn’t bother trying to insert more troops to make a controlled sweep of the rebels, but fired alpha strikes to demolish the entire area.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/69c4aea0-647f-4227-8fbe-4f4e70d099bc.jpeg)\n
    \n
    Greedo watched from afar, knowing that his family lived on the same city level as the rebels. It had gone from a victory to a tragedy. Greedo didn’t know if he had caused his family’s death from that distance, and he had no time to check if they were alive or dead before his mentor Goa was rushing him to a starship. The bounty hunters were fleeing en masse before the agitated Empire started asking hard questions to Nar Shaddaa’s underbelly. Maybe Greedo’s family was alright, but it was probably better not to know.\n
    \n
    Greedo ended up on Tatooine, and eventually in front of Jabba who was offering various bounty contracts. One of them was for Han Solo, and Greedo eagerly took it. His mentor Goa seemed mildly reluctant for Greedo to go after such an infamous target for his first job, but was ultimately supportive after Greedo insisted. Goa had originally had thoughts about just scamming Greedo, but although he internally continued to say it was all he was doing, he was legitimately helping Greedo and watching his back. After Greedo had a few failed attempts at collecting the money Solo owed, he got Jabba to allow a hit on Solo instead. Greedo planned to finish the job. Inside the Mos Eisley cantina Greedo watched Solo as he negotiated with a pair of passengers. While he waited, Goa was seated with a pair of Rodians. This was their first appearance in the story and Greedo didn’t have time to react before his opening to corner Solo appeared.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/8f649e3d-9f33-44dc-a85a-b775bdca0a4f.jpeg)\n
    \n
    Goa watched from his table as Solo unholstered his blaster under the table. He could have jumped in, and perhaps would have jumped in if it were not for the two Rodians seated with him. Solo blasted Greedo. Goa left for the local spaceport and got his payment by the Rodians, who were of the clan that was hunting Greedo. They had the mission to see that Greedo died, and had paid Goa to ensure it happened. Goa took his payment, though finally admitted out loud he wasn’t proud of it. Kind of a heartbreaking story of a bounty hunting career cut short by quiet betrayal.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/f3e7b2a9-bdb0-4ec0-b8b2-7e3ec2797076.webp)\n
    \n
    And that’s the end of Greedo’s tale.\n
    \n
    Except.\n
    \n
    There’s another story in the book. The bartender’s story, titled *Be Still My Heart* by David Bischoff, and it adds just a little bit more. It follows, of course, the bartender, who is named Wuher. He is kind of a pathetic guy. He has a deep passion for bartending, and he wants to be taken seriously.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/e1bae978-7a64-4fba-b1c8-fd28cb8185cf.jpeg)\n
    \n
    It’s hard for a human to be taken as a proper bartender by many of myriad species, who think humans are incapable of tending to their palettes, but Wuher tries hard both to educate himself and to distill drinks in the basement of the cantina. He constantly gets verbal abuse simply for being a human bartender, and takes out his resentment on droids, the only beings around who are lower on the social totem pole than he is. Every day he keeps working, and his special project is to distill a liquor that will please Jabba the Hutt himself. If Wuher can make it as Jabba’s bartender, he will truly have proved himself. Wuher’s efforts keep getting close to what he imagines will be the perfect blend for Jabba, but they are always missing that proper x factor. That something that is pungent, earthy, and just a hair meaty. Something decadent to a Hutt.\n
    \n
    One day, in the early morning hours on his way to keep working on his liquor, Wuher was stopped in an alley by a droid. It was called C2-R4. It was a small droid roughly based on the body style of an astromech, but with a bewildering number of parts allowing it to perform catalytic fuel conversion, enzymatic composition breakdown, bacterial composting acceleration, and chemical diagnostic programming as well as meal preparation, toaster oven, bang-corn air-popper, and blender.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/ebd3f8cb-33a4-43e2-bf67-cfd6281b645d.webp)\n
    \n
    Wuher kicked the droid away and went on to work. Wuher tended bar and watched as Greedo was shot through by Han Solo’s blaster. Seeing that sight changed something in him, and he rushed back to save that droid he had seen earlier. Wuher had decided to change his ways. No longer rejecting and discriminating against all droids, he brought little C2-R4 into the safety of his basement. He had seen the light. Because C2-R4 could break down organic material, which made it perfect for breaking down pieces of Greedo’s greasy, earthy, oily corpse and concentrating it into an enzyme that Wuher added to his liquor to produce the final touch for the perfect liquor for Jabba. Right about the same time Luke and Han were getting their medals for blowing up the Death Star, Greedo’s severed head was hanging in the bioalchemical alcove over a celebrating Wuher.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/0e02f48e-a38a-4415-8859-adf5357c4ed4.webp)\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/1e393a46-178b-497a-afa5-56612bea6cfd.jpeg)\n
    \n
    And that’s the real end of Greedo.\n
    \n
    That’s a lot to process. I liked both stories put together. The first did leave me sad, and the second, well its been a week and I still don’t know if I can articulate what I feel, but it is quite an unexpected post script to the short career of Greedo. Star Wars can go to some dark places, but still end up enthralling.\n
    \n
    This post is also an [article on my blog,](https://scratch-that.org/2024/01/01/live-fast-die-young-and-leave-a-greasy-corpse-a-review-of-greedos-story-in-tales-from-the-mos-eisley-cantina/) where I’ve got lots of other stuff too.
    """
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  +slug: "Live-Fast-Die-Young-And-Leave-A-Greasy-Corpse-A"
  +title: "Live Fast, Die Young, And Leave A Greasy Corpse: A Review Of Greedo’s Story In Tales From The Mos Eisley Cantina"
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    The book *Tales The The Mos Eisley Cantina* is an anthology published in 1995. It covers the lives and times of the various characters we glimpsed inside the Mos Eisley in A New Hope.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/d94e445d-5922-45b3-ac82-83f841e26867.jpeg)\n
    \n
    One of the more notable figures was Greedo, the bounty hunter who tried and failed to take down Han Solo. Greedo’s story, titled *A Hunter’s Fate*, was co-written by Tom and Martha Veitch. Tom was a big figure in 1990s Star Wars EU, having started Star Wars expansion into comics with both *Tales Of The Jedi* and *Dark Empire*, so I was excited to see what his Greedo short story had in store.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/5bc70801-329a-4cf1-b667-06c40b59c2fa.jpeg)\n
    \n
    The story started with a young, just barely teenage Greedo living on a jungle world. He lived with his mother, brother, and a small group of other Rodians. It was an idyllic and peaceful life, but young Greedo often suspected that the adults were keeping secrets. And they were, because the truth was that Greedo came from a Rodian clan that was being hunted extinction by a rival clan which had taken power. It wasn’t long into the story that the enclave of Greedo’s people were found by the rival clan, with many of the hunted being killed and only a small number escaping again to the stars. Greedo, his mother, and brother were among the few of his clan who managed to escape again to the stars, and eventually settled on the planet of Nar Shaddaa. Nar Shaddaa was very different than the jungle Greedo had originally been raised on. It was an urban planet with a sprawl of buildings and landing pads stack atop each other, crime was rampant, and even the Empire’s ability to protect power was tenuous. Fast forward a few years and Greedo has become a young punk. Swiping swoop bikes, pickpocketing, and spitting off over overpasses. He fit right in with the juvenile delinquents of the planet, but he wanted more. One day he got the chance, as by happenstance, a pair of bounty hunters across his path were accosted by a third, known as Gorm, who was looking to settle a debt. The altercation turned violent and the pair were about to dissolved by the imposing Gorm when Greedo picked up fallen blaster and shot Gorm in the back. The stunned pair of bounty hunters took Greedo in, and one in particular, named Goa become Greedo’s new mentor in the business of bounty hunting. All of this made me sympathetic to Greedo, he had a life constantly upended and on the run. Ending up on a planet of crime, it was only natural he fell into becoming a criminal, and with a desire for greatness he was blinded into taking a career path of violence to get it.\n
    \n
    After that Greedo had a short run in with Han Solo, who embarrassed him by seeing right through Greedo’s subpar pickpocket skills. This set up Greedo to have a grudge on Solo. While I understand that Greedo and Solo do need some way of having known each other, since they recognized each other in the Mos Eisley cantina, I felt this exchange was a little bit clumsy. Of all the ship garages on Nar Shaddaa Greedo happens to hang out at the one where Solo comes to get his ship fixed, and then later Greedo goes to Tatootine completely independently of Solo, but happens to end up there at the same time. It was an instance that made the galaxy feel a bit too small.\n
    \n
    I quickly got over that when Greedo decided to go in for a big payday with his mentors. Greedo knew about a rebel cell that was operating out of the same hidden city level that his clan had taken refuge in. The Empire was paying big for information on rebel forces, and once Greedo turned it in, he got paid and the Empire sent in a strike force. However, the rebels were surprisingly well prepared. They had a ion field artillery gun waiting in a building, which fired and nearly instantly sunk the Imperial strike force landing ships. It was a great action scene. It appeared to be a total rebel victory, and a good feeling for the reader. The protagonist Greedo got a paycheck, and the Empire got whomped. The the Imperial spider walker showed it. It wasn’t named, but it had to be a massive MT-AT which has a double laser cannon atop each of its eight legs, and another laser cannon on its head. The Imperial walker didn’t bother trying to insert more troops to make a controlled sweep of the rebels, but fired alpha strikes to demolish the entire area.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/69c4aea0-647f-4227-8fbe-4f4e70d099bc.jpeg)\n
    \n
    Greedo watched from afar, knowing that his family lived on the same city level as the rebels. It had gone from a victory to a tragedy. Greedo didn’t know if he had caused his family’s death from that distance, and he had no time to check if they were alive or dead before his mentor Goa was rushing him to a starship. The bounty hunters were fleeing en masse before the agitated Empire started asking hard questions to Nar Shaddaa’s underbelly. Maybe Greedo’s family was alright, but it was probably better not to know.\n
    \n
    Greedo ended up on Tatooine, and eventually in front of Jabba who was offering various bounty contracts. One of them was for Han Solo, and Greedo eagerly took it. His mentor Goa seemed mildly reluctant for Greedo to go after such an infamous target for his first job, but was ultimately supportive after Greedo insisted. Goa had originally had thoughts about just scamming Greedo, but although he internally continued to say it was all he was doing, he was legitimately helping Greedo and watching his back. After Greedo had a few failed attempts at collecting the money Solo owed, he got Jabba to allow a hit on Solo instead. Greedo planned to finish the job. Inside the Mos Eisley cantina Greedo watched Solo as he negotiated with a pair of passengers. While he waited, Goa was seated with a pair of Rodians. This was their first appearance in the story and Greedo didn’t have time to react before his opening to corner Solo appeared.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/8f649e3d-9f33-44dc-a85a-b775bdca0a4f.jpeg)\n
    \n
    Goa watched from his table as Solo unholstered his blaster under the table. He could have jumped in, and perhaps would have jumped in if it were not for the two Rodians seated with him. Solo blasted Greedo. Goa left for the local spaceport and got his payment by the Rodians, who were of the clan that was hunting Greedo. They had the mission to see that Greedo died, and had paid Goa to ensure it happened. Goa took his payment, though finally admitted out loud he wasn’t proud of it. Kind of a heartbreaking story of a bounty hunting career cut short by quiet betrayal.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/f3e7b2a9-bdb0-4ec0-b8b2-7e3ec2797076.webp)\n
    \n
    And that’s the end of Greedo’s tale.\n
    \n
    Except.\n
    \n
    There’s another story in the book. The bartender’s story, titled *Be Still My Heart* by David Bischoff, and it adds just a little bit more. It follows, of course, the bartender, who is named Wuher. He is kind of a pathetic guy. He has a deep passion for bartending, and he wants to be taken seriously.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/e1bae978-7a64-4fba-b1c8-fd28cb8185cf.jpeg)\n
    \n
    It’s hard for a human to be taken as a proper bartender by many of myriad species, who think humans are incapable of tending to their palettes, but Wuher tries hard both to educate himself and to distill drinks in the basement of the cantina. He constantly gets verbal abuse simply for being a human bartender, and takes out his resentment on droids, the only beings around who are lower on the social totem pole than he is. Every day he keeps working, and his special project is to distill a liquor that will please Jabba the Hutt himself. If Wuher can make it as Jabba’s bartender, he will truly have proved himself. Wuher’s efforts keep getting close to what he imagines will be the perfect blend for Jabba, but they are always missing that proper x factor. That something that is pungent, earthy, and just a hair meaty. Something decadent to a Hutt.\n
    \n
    One day, in the early morning hours on his way to keep working on his liquor, Wuher was stopped in an alley by a droid. It was called C2-R4. It was a small droid roughly based on the body style of an astromech, but with a bewildering number of parts allowing it to perform catalytic fuel conversion, enzymatic composition breakdown, bacterial composting acceleration, and chemical diagnostic programming as well as meal preparation, toaster oven, bang-corn air-popper, and blender.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/ebd3f8cb-33a4-43e2-bf67-cfd6281b645d.webp)\n
    \n
    Wuher kicked the droid away and went on to work. Wuher tended bar and watched as Greedo was shot through by Han Solo’s blaster. Seeing that sight changed something in him, and he rushed back to save that droid he had seen earlier. Wuher had decided to change his ways. No longer rejecting and discriminating against all droids, he brought little C2-R4 into the safety of his basement. He had seen the light. Because C2-R4 could break down organic material, which made it perfect for breaking down pieces of Greedo’s greasy, earthy, oily corpse and concentrating it into an enzyme that Wuher added to his liquor to produce the final touch for the perfect liquor for Jabba. Right about the same time Luke and Han were getting their medals for blowing up the Death Star, Greedo’s severed head was hanging in the bioalchemical alcove over a celebrating Wuher.\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/0e02f48e-a38a-4415-8859-adf5357c4ed4.webp)\n
    \n
    ![](https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/1e393a46-178b-497a-afa5-56612bea6cfd.jpeg)\n
    \n
    And that’s the real end of Greedo.\n
    \n
    That’s a lot to process. I liked both stories put together. The first did leave me sad, and the second, well its been a week and I still don’t know if I can articulate what I feel, but it is quite an unexpected post script to the short career of Greedo. Star Wars can go to some dark places, but still end up enthralling.\n
    \n
    This post is also an [article on my blog,](https://scratch-that.org/2024/01/01/live-fast-die-young-and-leave-a-greasy-corpse-a-review-of-greedos-story-in-tales-from-the-mos-eisley-cantina/) where I’ve got lots of other stuff too.
    """
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'long':194 'longer':1547 'look':365 'lot':1667,1746 'loud':1155 'lower':1321 'luke':1623 'made':426,595,1581 'make':785,1354 'manag':241 'mani':212,1265 'martha':73 'mass':874 'massiv':750 'materi':1579 'mayb':888 'meal':1480 'meati':1402 'medal':1629 'mentor':416,620,860,932 'mild':935 'miss':1387 'mission':1133 'money':998 'morn':1413 'mos':6,29,533,1019 'mother':137,230 'mt':752 'mt-at':751 'myriad':1267 'name':410,743,1225 'nar':255,257,551,884 'natur':451 'near':692 'need':518 'negoti':1027 'new':33,415 'notabl':42 'number':222,1457 'offer':915 'often':156 'oili':1593 'one':38,338,407,560,919,1408 'open':1062 'oper':629 'organ':1578 'origin':267,959 'oven':1483 'overpass':322 'owe':1000 'pad':283 'paid':662,1141 'pair':348,376,399,1030,1041 'palett':1278 'part':1459 'particular':409 'passeng':1032 'passion':1238 'path':354,471 'pathet':1232 'pay':647 'paycheck':727 'payday':617 'payment':1117,1150 'peac':151 'peopl':204 'perfect':1379,1583,1614 'perform':1463 'perhap':1089 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'tend':1275,1506 'tenuous':301 'think':1270 'third':359 'though':1151 'thought':961 'time':20,589,849,1057,1622 'titl':61,1201 'toaster':1482 'togeth':1675 'tom':71,75 'took':403,929,1148 'total':712 'totem':1325 'touch':1611 'tragedi':829 'tri':50,779,1281 'troop':783 'truli':1362 'truth':169 'turn':372,657 'two':1100 'ultim':952 'underbelli':887 'understand':512 'unexpect':1708 'unholst':1077 'upend':436 'urban':274 'various':23,916 've':1744 'veitch':74 'verbal':1300 'victori':714,826 'violenc':473 'violent':373 'wait':685,1035 'walker':737,775 'want':336,1243 'war':83,88,1718 'wasn':192,741,1157 'watch':805,985,1023,1071,1509 'way':520,1417,1545 'week':1689 'well':676,1478,1685 'went':1501 'whomp':732 'work':1334,1420,1504 'world':132 'would':1090 'written':69 'wuher':1226,1280,1352,1366,1424,1495,1505,1539,1602,1649 'x':1390 'year':306 'young':123,154,312"
  +cross: false
  +upVotes: 0
  +downVotes: 0
  +ranking: 1704245128
  +visibility: "visible             "
  +apId: "https://lemmy.world/post/10219373"
  +editedAt: DateTimeImmutable @1710591761 {#1528
    date: 2024-03-16 13:22:41.0 +01:00
  }
  +createdAt: DateTimeImmutable @1704158728 {#1527
    date: 2024-01-02 02:25:28.0 +01:00
  }
}

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