Maybe hot take: This was the episode that confirmed my feeling that Miles O’Brien isn’t necessarily a good person, there are definitely aspects to him that are good, he does do a lot of good, but he is chock full of a lot of prejudices he just often doesn’t seem interested in overcoming and everyone around him seems ok with just letting him be that way.
It seems like being xenophobic is a deliberate part of his character (look at how he treats Cardassians too); but I am always taken aback when he says something awful, because it feels so out of place in the optimistic future.
Plus, it seems like even the other in-universe characters are bothered by it (Keiko and Dr. Bashir have raised issues with it by the episode I am up to), so it is extra strange that he is “allowed” to just go around being casually xenophobic and hasn’t been sent to Federation sensitivity training or something.
The way I read it is miles o’brien is supposed to be the blue collar everyman character that draws in people who don’t usually like star trek but they just miss the mark on that often and they make it doubly uncomfortable by also making miles o’brien a very flawed, pretty close minded person which causes cognitive dissonance like you said because all the other characters love him.
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