APassenger

@APassenger@lemmy.one

I go places and do things. Sometimes I take pics.

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Getting Over a Breakup

How have you successfully gotten over a breakup? I did not end the relationship and it was the most significant of my life. I feel confused and trying to understand why. I’m not sleeping well and my anxiety has decided to resurface. I’m ruminating. I don’t have many people to go to about this. Please don’t say I will...

APassenger,

Grieve. Be kind to yourself, be kind to them. Allow yourself to feel without resisting the feelings. But don’t chase them either.

There isn’t a right way to feel for most of this.

Part of grieving is reflection (usually). Remembering good times, bad times and wish-they-were-different times. Find a way to be with those moments and accept them as they are: moments. They aren’t lost, just future ones will be different.

And that’s okay. Or it will be. And you’ll be okay, too.

I ruminate too. I tell myself it helps me learn, helps me grow, helps me remember not to “x”. It rarely helps. It’s just a conditioned response that makes me feel more control while i actually lose some.

What truly helps is healing. Learning that sometimes compatability isn’t a you tho Ing or a them thing. But it’s still a thing and somebody called the spade a spade.

If you weren’t up to your standards, then rise. Otherwise, coat yourself in patience. Listen to YouTube videos like Tara Brach. Be honest with yourself as you heal. We all have barbs, we all have scars.

APassenger,

I like all this and I’ll add that for those who choose to participate, there is more than enough. For those who opt out, there is no lack.

But numbing oneself isn’t a passtime.

And all are treated with respect and freedom for all is a primary principle.

In essence: this and the other post that includes no scarcity and the end of capitalism.

APassenger,

When I read the posy what I heard was: how do we ensure high quality content? If we have that, SE won’t need the O.

And I’m down for high quality.

APassenger,

Or the better.

APassenger,

I’m curious, which part is a myth? I only see facts and not all of them paint America as great.

These things exist elsewhere, besides. Just not always in “the West.”

APassenger,

America is far from a monolith. Our states roughly equate to different European countries with vastly different cultures, foods, rights and laws.

We just speak dialects that are almost all the same and roll up under one political entity. It is not so dissimilar than the EU, otherwise.

We are, in many practical terms a forced confederation with a shared Constitution. There are those, like in the EU, who want out.

Edit: the shared single language is one of our under-recognized super-powers. I can travel this huge land mass and communicate viably everywhere. It is key to our cultural impact. It is accidental, but helpful to us. Except when we have people who dislike our impact and become hostile.

APassenger,

Which Americans are you talking to? We know there are other countries and cultures. We just aren’t responsible for learning deeply about all of them. No one is.

You’re using some strong, broad strokes that aren’t reflective of my experience at all.

APassenger,

I am learning those things… hell, I’m studying a completely different language and learning the history.

I think I’m not who you think I am.

APassenger,

My wife and I binge zombie movies on Easter and wish each other happy zombie day.

We don't usually tell others this is what we do.

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