I disagree with the hey. It depends on the dating app.
If the app confirms that you’re both interested then hey is a bad opening. Okcupid, when I was originally using it, I would read through the profile and tailor a question to them. I found it pointless if they weren’t interested in me. So saying hey acted as a filter to find who would be interested in me.
I completely understand and I kind of agree that it’s low effort. However, my experience was that my “high effort messages” received maybe a 1/10th of the responses that got with hey. And then if factor in how many less people I was messaging because I was tailoring it then the amount of interested responses was significantly less.
Again, if it’s an app like tinder where you both have to show interest then I wouldn’t start with hey. Otherwise I view it as just showing interest and then if they respond then I can follow it up with something from their profile.
But I’ve been out of that scene for a decade so I have to imagine with enshitification that online dating is now even worse.
The slow decline isn't slow anymore (lemmy.world)
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