I had an … uh, interesting new years, I ate some pre-warned strong magic edible brownies, and it’s never happenend before but from 11pm till 2am I went into a deep paranoid psycosis, hallucinating, losing grip on reality, time-jumps, paranoid, not knowing what’s going on, hard to talk to / interact with people, just having a poker-face trying to appear normal, lying on a couch, waiting to get through @__ i’ma stay away from psychedelics from now on, awesome for most ppl, but I don’t want to unlock something and have any of that when im sober x__x
Ya the bad trip wasn’t that bad , but I think I’ll stay from psychodelics again just to be safe , which sucks because I’ve always been more into the idea of them rather than alcohol , we’ll hope they get legal for everyone else’s benefit~
Got a dogshit performance review because I did not conform to the pointless metrics we’re judged against, like ‘Positivity’ and ‘Responsiveness’ (because I didn’t smile every day and I don’t answer teams messages after hours.) I hate this job. Fuck capitalism.
Hang in there OP, I left the company I worked for early last year for reasons like that. Sure isn’t the easiest thing to do (x-gen here) but I feel like it’s always ^tm^ a good solution when your job sucks(the soul out of you).
Painfully. Ribcage & sternum in bits following some overly exuberant dancing on the 30th. Hopefully just bruising & fractures and not soft tissue damage, but extra uncomfortable with a bad cough.
Still, should help me quit smoking as in too much pain to want to & likewise to shift pattern of seeing boyfriend to something far less frequent.
EDIT: realised I had to end things with boyfriend, so did that then got a barrage of super-manipulative texts, complete with vague suicide threats, so definitely dodged a bullet there. Very supportive message then came in from a mutual friend, so was able to clear up a few things.
Keeping him unblocked but muted, just in case he threatens to approach. Having forewarning (and evidence if it really escalates) is useful & my feelings are now such that he’s incapable of upsetting me.
So far pretty slow. Work has been a slow drip (unsurprising) and everyone is just slowly getting back to normal after the holidays. But hey, I’m caught up on sleep so I’ve got that going for me!
This didn’t seem the wrong place to do this so here goes.
I am new here…Most people call me Mara, or Bob, there are a few other AKA’s I am known by but those are my favorites so feel free to use those or what ever you want. I answer to a lot of names. This is such an awesome concept. The short version of my background is I am Autistic (1), Gay, and Satanist. I use he/him but gender doesn’t really have a lot of meaning to me, so whatever works. This is my first real day here so I am a bit overwhelmed but I am learning my way around and it is so amazing reading and getting to know the philosophies.
I am not going to write a book here but I do like to talk so please feel free to engage me. I am very politically engaged (I am very left for an American). I do believe that claims require sources, unless they are clearly stated as opinion. I have some diverse hobbies so there is always something to talk about. One last thing, and I know how this sounds, but know I mean it. No mater what, no matter how bad the disagreement, or how far our opinions differ I really do love you! That doesn’t Change.
Thinking about resolutions, I want to be more active this year but want to find something that feels convenient enough to not give me an excuse. There’s a gym near my office, so I might try to do a quick half hour workout before going in since 70% of the battle is leaving the house
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