I made a mistake, fine. Visudo doesnt work either from my recent experience. At the very least, it should say „dont use sudo as root“ instead of „the command doesnt exist“.
You could have explained it without the elitist touch. Tyvm
I added my user to the sudo group and rebooted (as relogging doesnt work either).
So, debian is cool but you can definitely see how fanboiism keeps it from being great.