It’s because they’re all juvenile though. They actually don’t produce a hormone needed for proper growth and that’s why they look the way they do. They are supposed to go through another stage of growth, and their appearance and existence is because of a genetic birth defect.
Murray Gell-Mann did (the guy who named them for anyone unaware). The general opinion seems to have been similar to that of the guy who invented the gif however: just because he named it doesn’t mean he wasn’t wrong about how it is pronounced.
Wellllll … I’ve never personally tried it myself (=P) but AFAIK it should not hurt. Seals have a very thick layer of fat under their skin (blubber) so it probably feels like bouncing on a gym mattress at worst. Plus, their natural habitat is full of uncomfortable looking rocks anyway (example) and it would be an evolutionary disadvantage if they were in pain all the time from just moving around. Flat pavement without sharp edges probably feels less uncomfortable than those rocks.
mildlyinteresting
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