Looking at the map and visible fire, if the monster decided to leave at that moment, I’d still be alive for as long as half the planet being on fire would allow. That’s only if I ignore the joke and multiple other factors such as earthquakes, tidal waves and probably nukes.
I’m exactly the same as you, I think the last time I paid attention to anything Pokémon was ruby/sapphire. After that I don’t know anything. I could have a good go at naming the original 151 still but when it became a cash grab I lost interest.