No real first hand experience. I kinda interacted with people that were /are poly, but wasn’t part of their group.
But the thing I noticed about poly groups regarding the kind of stability that would be a success in any objective view, is that there’s usually a core few that comprise the true group, with anyone else being kinda replaceable. It’s usually either a “throuple”, or two pairs, and those core relationships are what really matters when there’s any trouble.
Imo, that makes sense. In a real world sense, nobody loves everyone equally. It might get close, but we as a species just aren’t that controlled in our emotions. They’re shifting and tied to so many different memories that it’s barley possible to have comparable levels of love, much less exactly the same.
And, there’s the issue of numbers and work. If a couple has X amount of work to maintain, a third person doesn’t turn that into X+1, it turns it into X^3, because you have A×B, the first two, then you have A×C, B×C, and, A×B×C. The dynamics of each pair of individuals is the same, but you add the dynamics of the group to that. Add a 4th person, and you get X^4, and so on. So, the larger the group gets, the harder it is to actually maintain every relationship at all, much less equally.
But! I know two poly groups that have been stable for a long time. One since the mid nineties, the other since 2003 (officially, but they got together informally a few years before that). The older group stabilized out at five people back around 98, when a couple that had joined in decided it wasn’t working for them.
The other group is essentially a foursome, though they tend to rotate through twosomes over time. Like, one couple spends a few months more focused on each other, then the other two people either do the same or float a little as individuals without as much group interaction. But they’re all bisexual as well as poly, so there’s that helping out a little; everyone is into everyone romantically and sexually, so there’s less chance of someone feeling left out.
Both groups have kids, btw. Which can get a little tough on the kids in school, but damned if it isn’t a plus at home. Like, those kids never lack for someone to help them, give them affection or discipline, or anything. The oldest boy from the longer lasting group is out on his own now, and doing well for himself.
The only other poly group I know well enough to have picked up details about their arrangements went back a lot further, back into the sixties when they met. Which is a success, if you ask me, but there’s only the one lady left now, and that’s fucking brutal to lose three partners that you love like that. I don’t know if it’s any worse than losing a monogamous partner or not, but holy hell has she been through some pain over the last two decades.
I call them a success though. They went through fourty-plus years together, raised kids, lived life, and stuck together. I didn’t meet any of them until one of the guys had a stroke, back before I got hit with the disability stick and had to quit working. I was a CNA, and when he had the next stroke, they asked if I could come back, so I got to know them a good bit. But they’d lost one of their group between times to cancer.
For myself, I don’t think I could handle that part. I know that if my wife dies before me, it’s going to break me. I can’t imagine going through that two or three (or more) times.
Which is probably not the most pleasant way to end this comment, being a bit less happy than maybe you were wanting. But I figure if one group of people can live poly together long enough for that, then polyamory is nothing to dismiss, and it’s certainly proof that it can be satisfying and good.
Generally, it’s based on appropriateness to the C/, effort, and usefulness.
There are exceptions, though there aren’t any on C/s that I actually use. But there might be eventually, there were on reddit.
If something doesn’t fit the C/, that’s a down vote if I notice it.
If something is horribly low effort, even if it’s in the right place, that’ll be a down vote.
Upvotes, it tends to be because something was appropriate to the C/, and/or someone put some work in. But, even a low effort post/comment can get an up vote if it’s personally useful.
I used to up vote anything and everything that was on topic, but lemmy has gotten busy enough that I tend to only vote at all if I interact with the post in some way. So, like a title that indicates the post isn’t something that will interest me, I just scroll past because there’s just so much stuff now. But, I scroll All, and sort by new by default, so I end up scrolling past stuff that isn’t in my subscription list. If I only scrolled through subscribed stuff, I’d probably end up voting the same amount, but voting on everything I saw, if that makes sense.
It is sociality absolutely equivalent to software.
You don’t have to continue adding to a book, just like a company wouldn’t have to continue development of the software involved. You let the owner of the hardware write their own fanfiction to keep the hardware alive.
And, yeah, actually, giving away free copies is absolutely denying a future sale of that publication.
However, that’s not even the point. You said nobody downvoting would do that, give away the software that was no longer being maintained. I absolutely would do so. You can debate equivalency all you want, but that has nothing to do with my statement that I absolutely would at least open source any deprecated software like the post is discussing. As you may have noticed, other people have stated that they would act based on their principles as well. If you don’t want to believe any of us, that’s on you, but calling that many people liars tends to be dumber than dammit if you don’t have a good reason to do so.
Again, me, the unnamed person behind the screen, would 100% either open source the software in question, or otherwise make it available to previous customers. That’s my principle, I fully support the right to repair.
See, the idea that planned obsolescence via lack of service and support is a good thing isn’t accepted by everyone. That theoretical future sale is only possible, and unless I held a monopoly on whatever thing I’m selling, there’s a significant chance of losing sales to competitors that give better customer service. I’d much rather have repeat customers that know they can invest in my product without worry.
I’d also much rather know that my product was doing good work, advancing research and human knowledge, than sell another and waste the previous one.
Maybe you don’t think that way. Maybe you want to maximize profits over any other concern. That’s your karma, your decision, not mine.
Huh? I dunno how to break it to you, but being an adult is about handling your shit. You get your shit done. No excuses, no h alf-assing things.
If you use a disability as an excuse to not handle your shit, you aren’t adulting. And that’s coming from a physical cripple. You find the tools you need, you find accommodations that get the job done.
Now, much like with physical disability, neurodivergence can mean that you simply can’t do the same things as anyone else. That’s why things like ssi and ssdi exist, they give you room. I’m not talking a literal job in all cases, I’m talking about getting the shit done that is within one’s ability to perform.
But there’s always a point where a person has to decide to either handle their shit or punk out and use their limitations as an excuse. And that’s what the cartoon is about, imo.
Well, I’m open to other interpretations in general. There’s room for that, despite the Wilder Wonka being impossible to beat.
I didn’t hate Charlie and the chocolate factory, though that’s mostly because it was a movie of the book rather than a new version of the movie.
And, I like chalumet (however it’s spelled). He’s done some good work. So I’m not against the idea of him doing it.
It’s what you said, it feels like a cash grab rather than a genuine attempt at making a new movie. Those so rarely end well. And, if it sucks as bad as I fear, it kinda t aints the story itself; it would be harder for someone else to do a new movie based on the book in the future (I still maintain that the Wilder movie wasn’t meant to be a true translation of the book, and the Depp movie failed at that despite trying). I’d like to see a truly faithful translation of the book.
I’ve been handing out free copies of shit for over a decade now. Shit that I got published as an author.
I would absolutely do the same with software. Mind you, that’s assuming I was allowed to. It’s unlikely any given code monkey is going to own the company entirely with that kind of hardware.
I got one of their limited runs from a buddy about two years ago. I can’t really say it was better than the standard. A little “hotter”, even, swish which isn’t something I tend to prefer.