I personally am in a phenomenally stable polyamorous relationship. I’ve been married to my wife for 12 years, and she has had the same boyfriend for about half of that time. It’s a really fulfilling arrangement for all of us in various ways. We’re all genuinely happy and satisfied. I’m kind of casually looking for a...
No real first hand experience. I kinda interacted with people that were /are poly, but wasn’t part of their group.
But the thing I noticed about poly groups regarding the kind of stability that would be a success in any objective view, is that there’s usually a core few that comprise the true group, with anyone else being kinda replaceable. It’s usually either a “throuple”, or two pairs, and those core relationships are what really matters when there’s any trouble.
Imo, that makes sense. In a real world sense, nobody loves everyone equally. It might get close, but we as a species just aren’t that controlled in our emotions. They’re shifting and tied to so many different memories that it’s barley possible to have comparable levels of love, much less exactly the same.
And, there’s the issue of numbers and work. If a couple has X amount of work to maintain, a third person doesn’t turn that into X+1, it turns it into X^3, because you have A×B, the first two, then you have A×C, B×C, and, A×B×C. The dynamics of each pair of individuals is the same, but you add the dynamics of the group to that. Add a 4th person, and you get X^4, and so on. So, the larger the group gets, the harder it is to actually maintain every relationship at all, much less equally.
But! I know two poly groups that have been stable for a long time. One since the mid nineties, the other since 2003 (officially, but they got together informally a few years before that). The older group stabilized out at five people back around 98, when a couple that had joined in decided it wasn’t working for them.
The other group is essentially a foursome, though they tend to rotate through twosomes over time. Like, one couple spends a few months more focused on each other, then the other two people either do the same or float a little as individuals without as much group interaction. But they’re all bisexual as well as poly, so there’s that helping out a little; everyone is into everyone romantically and sexually, so there’s less chance of someone feeling left out.
Both groups have kids, btw. Which can get a little tough on the kids in school, but damned if it isn’t a plus at home. Like, those kids never lack for someone to help them, give them affection or discipline, or anything. The oldest boy from the longer lasting group is out on his own now, and doing well for himself.
The only other poly group I know well enough to have picked up details about their arrangements went back a lot further, back into the sixties when they met. Which is a success, if you ask me, but there’s only the one lady left now, and that’s fucking brutal to lose three partners that you love like that. I don’t know if it’s any worse than losing a monogamous partner or not, but holy hell has she been through some pain over the last two decades.
I call them a success though. They went through fourty-plus years together, raised kids, lived life, and stuck together. I didn’t meet any of them until one of the guys had a stroke, back before I got hit with the disability stick and had to quit working. I was a CNA, and when he had the next stroke, they asked if I could come back, so I got to know them a good bit. But they’d lost one of their group between times to cancer.
For myself, I don’t think I could handle that part. I know that if my wife dies before me, it’s going to break me. I can’t imagine going through that two or three (or more) times.
Which is probably not the most pleasant way to end this comment, being a bit less happy than maybe you were wanting. But I figure if one group of people can live poly together long enough for that, then polyamory is nothing to dismiss, and it’s certainly proof that it can be satisfying and good.
Now, whether or not they meet a specific criteria for a specific standard used in a scientific field is not in debate. Obviously, the standard for what defines a planet in a given field of study is applicable in that field.
However, for the rest of us, we don’t have to use that standard. See, using a language for something lile science is filled with this kind of thing when you use a living language that’s why Latin is so often the default for situations where you need fixed definitions. Otherwise, you deal with this issue constantly.
Though, tbh, even that’s no certain protection because people will borrow words, or misuse them just because we’re essentially a bunch of parrots playing with sounds sometimes. Lol at what happened with words like idiot or moron. They used to have a fixed, certain meaning with a standard used to apply them. Now they’re just insults.
The “planets” have existed in the public awareness with a much looser definition than what is used in scientific fields. Pretty much anything can be a planet in colloquial usage, so long as it orbits the sun. Now, I believe most people would insist on a lower size threshold where something is no longer a planet, but some other term. The problem is that there’s not a consensus on that lower limit.
With ceres and eris in specific, most people that are aware they exist are gong to be into “space” in some way, maybe even professionally. That makes the usage of planet for them less common than for Pluto, but the more casual the interest in such things, the more likely they are to get lumped in as “the 10th planet” or 10th and 11th, depending on who is saying things.
But, for casual conversation, I’d say that all three are planets. I’d have to look up the standards again because I’m fucking old, but I would also be just fine with someone calling them dwarf planets, or planetoids, or whatever.
Seriously. Until someone is just outright ignoring common usage and making up definitions nobody else uses, this kind of thing is just part of the fun of being monkeys that make complex sounds. None of us are obligated to use jargon definitions in casual settings, and trying to force that is not only pointless, it’s sometimes rude.
Huh? I dunno how to break it to you, but being an adult is about handling your shit. You get your shit done. No excuses, no h alf-assing things.
If you use a disability as an excuse to not handle your shit, you aren’t adulting. And that’s coming from a physical cripple. You find the tools you need, you find accommodations that get the job done.
Now, much like with physical disability, neurodivergence can mean that you simply can’t do the same things as anyone else. That’s why things like ssi and ssdi exist, they give you room. I’m not talking a literal job in all cases, I’m talking about getting the shit done that is within one’s ability to perform.
But there’s always a point where a person has to decide to either handle their shit or punk out and use their limitations as an excuse. And that’s what the cartoon is about, imo.
It is sociality absolutely equivalent to software.
You don’t have to continue adding to a book, just like a company wouldn’t have to continue development of the software involved. You let the owner of the hardware write their own fanfiction to keep the hardware alive.
And, yeah, actually, giving away free copies is absolutely denying a future sale of that publication.
However, that’s not even the point. You said nobody downvoting would do that, give away the software that was no longer being maintained. I absolutely would do so. You can debate equivalency all you want, but that has nothing to do with my statement that I absolutely would at least open source any deprecated software like the post is discussing. As you may have noticed, other people have stated that they would act based on their principles as well. If you don’t want to believe any of us, that’s on you, but calling that many people liars tends to be dumber than dammit if you don’t have a good reason to do so.
Again, me, the unnamed person behind the screen, would 100% either open source the software in question, or otherwise make it available to previous customers. That’s my principle, I fully support the right to repair.
See, the idea that planned obsolescence via lack of service and support is a good thing isn’t accepted by everyone. That theoretical future sale is only possible, and unless I held a monopoly on whatever thing I’m selling, there’s a significant chance of losing sales to competitors that give better customer service. I’d much rather have repeat customers that know they can invest in my product without worry.
I’d also much rather know that my product was doing good work, advancing research and human knowledge, than sell another and waste the previous one.
Maybe you don’t think that way. Maybe you want to maximize profits over any other concern. That’s your karma, your decision, not mine.
I’ve been handing out free copies of shit for over a decade now. Shit that I got published as an author.
I would absolutely do the same with software. Mind you, that’s assuming I was allowed to. It’s unlikely any given code monkey is going to own the company entirely with that kind of hardware.
For those who may not know, the IPA (international phonetics alphabet) is widely used for writing out how words are spoken. It’s very useful for linguists writing research papers, and for people looking to learn new languages!...
Sorry, but the utter inanity of “faith of the heart” as a lyric kills any possible enjoyment of the song for me. The bland but overwrought vocals don’t help, but if the lyrics were good enough, I could look past that.
I’ve said it before, I didn’t mind a lyrical theme song, I minded that song. It was just so damn empty and cookie cutter. Like, the frakking Dr Pol theme song is better because it’s at least not pretending to be something it isn’t.
I think everyone has already covered the fact that it depends on which kind of zombie you’re talking about, since the only “real” zombies aren’t actually undead at all, and are certainly not mindless.
But! Even within the brain hungry zombie type, there would be plenty of reasons to target something other than the head!
First, the chances of attacking a living person, getting through their skull, and to the brain in a single attack are low. So, attacking other parts of the body in order to prevent the prey from escaping is a good idea.
If you then assume that the zombies will want living brains, rather than freshly dead, the guts are the ideal target. See, if you can get the living human down, and tear into their guts, they’ll be immobilized for the most part, but their heart should stay beating for at least a few minutes. This gives your brain eating zombie much better chances of having a bit of live brain. So, even if they’re too weak to crack the skull and eat quickly, if you have time, you can make it happen anyway.
Now, you probably were seeing one of the varieties of zombie fiction where their hunger is for either flesh in general and human by preference, or specifically for human flesh.
The walking dead zombies were flesh eaters in general, they were shown to eat deer and horse for sure, but seemed to prefer human when available. And there were a good number of scenes where they were seen digging into the abdomen. While Robert Kirkman has never given real details about how and why his zombies function as they do, we know two things for sure: First, they can function even when their body isn’t fully intact; second that they have a constant hunger for flesh that will drive them to attempt to eat, no matter what happens to the rest of them. Indeed, severed zombie heads can still try and eat.
So, you run into zombies in that world that may not be at full strength, but can drag down the living in numbers. They then crawl their way to the meat and gnaw.
But, the reason why walking dead zombies often go for the soft parts rather than arms and legs isn’t an in-universe thing, it’s practical. Zombies tearing the guts out of a victim looks cooler, and it’s easier to make effects for. Making a believable leg eating prop is a lot harder.
There’s also been versions of zombies where they have residual capacity for thinking, and memories. When that’s the case, you could be dealing with the mind that’s left going for a target that’s easier to chew into, as compared to a skull. The throat and belly are the most vulnerable targets available for human teeth that will kill or immobilize in a reasonable span of time.
I got one of their limited runs from a buddy about two years ago. I can’t really say it was better than the standard. A little “hotter”, even, swish which isn’t something I tend to prefer.
If some lady brought out a conversation that fucking awesome, I wouldn’t want a second date either. I’d fucking propose. Well, would have. There’s very little sexier than enthusiasm and a love of knowledge.
And no, not literally propose, and it would hopefully turn into a second date, but that’s no fucking fun to open up with in a comment, ffs, you fucking pedant.
Well, as much as I hate to say it, most people are so busy looking for their turn to talk that it wouldn’t matter how interesting what you’re saying is.
Which, I get. I’m not immune to eventually losing attention to unfamiliar material. But that’s why you listen; you pay attention and ask about what they just said if you aren’t familiar with it. If nothing else, let your brain perk away while you listen and wait for it to ring the bell of association! Until you get into some really arcane subjects, there’s almost always going to be a point where something relates to something you already know, so it’s just a matter of being patient.
But, sadly, I think you’re right. Women simply get ignored, even by other women. Doesn’t matter how much they know, how high their degree of expertise is. People tend to rank anything coming out of a woman’s mouth as less important. It certainly isn’t the entirety, but I would agree it contributes, as you said.
‘Warner Bros/Heyday Films’ Wonka has been granted a December 8 release in China, a week ahead of the domestic start and as part of an early overseas rollout for the Timothée Chalamet-starrer. Wonka will be going the same day as Universal/Illumination’s Migration in China.’
Well, I’m open to other interpretations in general. There’s room for that, despite the Wilder Wonka being impossible to beat.
I didn’t hate Charlie and the chocolate factory, though that’s mostly because it was a movie of the book rather than a new version of the movie.
And, I like chalumet (however it’s spelled). He’s done some good work. So I’m not against the idea of him doing it.
It’s what you said, it feels like a cash grab rather than a genuine attempt at making a new movie. Those so rarely end well. And, if it sucks as bad as I fear, it kinda t aints the story itself; it would be harder for someone else to do a new movie based on the book in the future (I still maintain that the Wilder movie wasn’t meant to be a true translation of the book, and the Depp movie failed at that despite trying). I’d like to see a truly faithful translation of the book.
I hate that I always compare Lemmy to Reddit, but Reddit used to have (not sure if they still do) guidelines called “Reddiquette” that included guidelines about upvoting and downvoting. I don’t remember the specifics (and sending too much of my browser traffic to Reddit makes me feel dirty) but one of the guidelines was...
Generally, it’s based on appropriateness to the C/, effort, and usefulness.
There are exceptions, though there aren’t any on C/s that I actually use. But there might be eventually, there were on reddit.
If something doesn’t fit the C/, that’s a down vote if I notice it.
If something is horribly low effort, even if it’s in the right place, that’ll be a down vote.
Upvotes, it tends to be because something was appropriate to the C/, and/or someone put some work in. But, even a low effort post/comment can get an up vote if it’s personally useful.
I used to up vote anything and everything that was on topic, but lemmy has gotten busy enough that I tend to only vote at all if I interact with the post in some way. So, like a title that indicates the post isn’t something that will interest me, I just scroll past because there’s just so much stuff now. But, I scroll All, and sort by new by default, so I end up scrolling past stuff that isn’t in my subscription list. If I only scrolled through subscribed stuff, I’d probably end up voting the same amount, but voting on everything I saw, if that makes sense.
This Pickle (lemmy.world)
It's a sample. For my desk. (mander.xyz)
What are your experiences with polyamory, first or second hand?
I personally am in a phenomenally stable polyamorous relationship. I’ve been married to my wife for 12 years, and she has had the same boyfriend for about half of that time. It’s a really fulfilling arrangement for all of us in various ways. We’re all genuinely happy and satisfied. I’m kind of casually looking for a...
I dunno, still might be aliens with this one. (mander.xyz)
What a mouthful [ADHDinos] (lemmy.world)
ADHDinos Source Links:...
abandonware empires (mander.xyz)
I made an IPA keyboard for fcitx on Linux! (pub.kemonomimi.gay)
For those who may not know, the IPA (international phonetics alphabet) is widely used for writing out how words are spoken. It’s very useful for linguists writing research papers, and for people looking to learn new languages!...
It's so bubbly, cloying...and happy. (lemmy.world)
🌰🌰🌰 Quercus Master Race 🌰🌰🌰 (mander.xyz)
I have no shame. (lemmy.world)
If zombies are supposed to go after brains, then why do they almost always end up tearing into the abdomen and other parts instead?
Seriously, are the zombies too stupid to find the brain? Are they too weak to crack open the skull?...
Americans - I Need Help Choosing A Bourbon
I’ve got a mate whos a big fan of Bourbon. He’s tried all the standard brands like Buffalo Trace, JD, Jim Beam and Wild Turkey....
🌿👀🌿 (mander.xyz)
Boquila trifoliolata mimics leaves of an artificial plastic host plant...
really makes you think... (mander.xyz)
‘Wonka’ Granted China Release On Same Day As ‘Migration’; Both Pics Rolling Out Early Overseas (lemmy.world)
‘Warner Bros/Heyday Films’ Wonka has been granted a December 8 release in China, a week ahead of the domestic start and as part of an early overseas rollout for the Timothée Chalamet-starrer. Wonka will be going the same day as Universal/Illumination’s Migration in China.’
Undiscovered country music (startrek.website)
What are your criteria for upvoting/downvoting?
I hate that I always compare Lemmy to Reddit, but Reddit used to have (not sure if they still do) guidelines called “Reddiquette” that included guidelines about upvoting and downvoting. I don’t remember the specifics (and sending too much of my browser traffic to Reddit makes me feel dirty) but one of the guidelines was...