The trick is to have the things obstruct the door, so you’re forced to become consciously aware of them as you leave. Nothing short of that (or a spreadsheet for packing if you’re going overnight) works for me.
I bring a satchel with me when I leave the house. I leave it in the car 99% of the time, but it has my sunglasses, sanitizer, umbrella, etc. in it. So, it’s helpful to bring along. I toss my keys in it and whatever the important thing is. If the important this is too big, I wrap the strap of the satchel around the thing or wind the strap around some part of it. I still forget things sometimes, but this has helped me significantly.
There was a meme I saw on Lemmy a while back that said undiagnosed ADHD is like having life set to hard mode but you and everybody else think you’re set to easy mode.
Getting a diagnosis and/or treatment doesn’t change the fact that you’re on hard mode, but at least you know what you need to tackle.
I always put my keys on anything I need to remember, since they’re the last thing I grab before I head out, and I can’t lock the door or start the car without them. If it’s more of a concept, I write it on a post-it, then put the keys on that.
I don’t often personally identify with this comic, because I don’t have ADHD, but I feel this one deeply.
I have found that putting things by the door doesn’t work as well as putting them with things that you will never forget to take. For example, I don’t wear shoes indoors, so I will put the thing I need to take inside my shoes. Or since I have a private garage, I can simply put it in my car ahead of time.
One thing I learned from Dr Drew from the Loveline days is to put your keys with that thing. He would put his keys with vaccines in the fridge to take with him when he left. So if you plan to drive when you go put your keys with the thing or the thing with your keys. I always thought about having a “take box” an box dedicated solely to holding the things you need to take somewhere.
Sounds like an easy way to lose the keys and forget the thing. Have to always have the keys in the pants or risk forgetting them… at least until the front door gets closed.
In the situation described, it sounds like he needed to bring along vaccines that would have to be refrigerated. I wouldn’t normally use my keys to remember something, but if the only time I used them was when I put them in the refrigerator, it might theoretically be okay, except for the thing I mention in the next paragraph. Definitely less crazy than me putting my shoes in the fridge.
But the other thing is that I’m personally a bit paranoid about losing my keys, or having somebody take them, and can’t ever leave my keys in a public area of the house. I might actually have to put my shoes in the fridge like a crazy person.
Say you want to remember to take a particular bag with you when you leave. Close your eyes for 5 seconds and imagine something outrageous, surreal, balls out crazy. Only takes 5 seconds, but the crazier the image you make up the better.
For this one I might imagine my postman or UPS standing there when I open my door, with the bag covering his head. Or I might imagine that bag as a giant bag full of rabid weasels blocking the door.
You might not even see the image again, but you will remember the bag. Shit’s like magic.
I don’t use any long term memory tactics because if I’m doing it wrong, what I remember yesterday will blend with what I remember tomorrow, and if it’s different, I’m in a world of hurt.
It’s life changing. Unfortunately, how are you going to remember to remember?! I use mnemonics mainly when I don’t want to leave the house without something, but it’s worth practicing for any event. 5 seconds imagining something stupid is all I ask. Try it!
It’s hilarious when you walk up to the door and think, “Oh yeah, you’re going to camp, grab the .22 rifle mag.”, and you have no idea how that happened. LOL, sometimes you don’t see the pic, but somehow your brain does.
Assuming you’re driving, I find putting my car keys with the thing works. Just be careful if you have a fob; sometimes they don’t work as well after being in the fridge.
This is relatable. In my experience, the only way to prevent is to make it literally impossible to leave for the place without bonking into the thing. Like don’t put the thing next to the door, put it in front of the door.
For real. I have sometimes put important things on my jacket, and my jacket in front of the door. That works. And I still tend to pick up my jacket so the thing I was to remember falls to the floor because it somehow still doesn’t occur to me that I put my jacket on the floor in order to remember something…
“Thing thing thing remember to bring the thing” “I always forget things, but not this time because I’m thinking about thing” “I must have ADHD for always forgetting to bring things” “How do other people just remember things?” “There’s a bunch about me that’s different from other people, probably from my undiagnosed ADHD” “Like how I can’t focus during conversations because my mind drifts” “And how I…”
Another good tip is to try a positive reminder. So, instead of: “Don’t forget the thing!” you’d rather tell your self: “I will totally take the thing!”
Don’t put the thing in an easy to remember spot, or an easy to find spot. Put it in an inevitable spot. It has to be physically impossible to leave without it.
Small items can go in front of the door, or put the keys with them, ideally clipped on with a carabiner. Large items have to either block the door, or go in the car ahead of time immediately when I think of it.
Combine this with a wife who is a pro at losing things, and if something is in her way she’ll move it to the nearest open flat surface with no time or reason.
![Out of sight, out of mind [ADHDinos]](https://startrek.website/pictrs/image/c84a1739-5085-408b-bb3d-72950276491e.jpeg){kind=link}
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