Yeah, decoupling cap here might as well just help OP fry the chip more effectively by ensuring it can sink all that current.
Solution here is probably a transistor/MOSFET that the chip turns on, which in turn turns on the relay. Relay coils are inductors, so that probably also needs a diode to protect the transistor from inrush current and also the kickback when it turns off: inductors resist changes, so it’ll try to keep sinking the current and result in temporary spike of very high voltage: spinningnumbers.org/a/inductor-kickback.html