How do you cope with the state of the world today?
Everything just seems so out of control. The US seems to be tearing itself apart. The world is on fire. We seem to be going backwards when it comes to freedom and human rights. We’ve turned our backs on each other. How do you cope with all this without just giving up?
Well, I like to remind myself that the only constant in the world is change, and that mostly, we aren’t watching the world crumble, we’re watching it change.
And I recognize that change is hard and that it’s mostly an unpleasant process. But I also know that in aggregate, the change we’ve seen throughout history has been far more positive than negative by almost every metric. For example, I live every day knowing that an infection is not going to kill me, I couldn’t have said that 100 years ago. As a person of color, I enjoy the amount of freedom I have, I certainly wouldn’t have had that in the US 250 years ago. If you look back further, I enjoy more luxuries today than an emperor could have 1000 years ago (hell, I can eat strawberries in the winter).
The point I’m making is that in general the world is on a positive trajectory, and has been (for the most part) for all of recorded history. If you consider the context, things aren’t really all that bad right now, and history suggests they’ll get better.
For me, personally: Shit’s always been out of control, and even though it may seem like human rights are going backwards, we’re better off now than we’ve ever been. Interacting with my own kids and the college students I work with gives me a lot of hope. We really just need the boomers to stop getting nostalgic for the “good old days” when you were allowed to bully anyone who was different from you.
The kids are progress. Support them! Let them turn the world into what they what it to be, and not what we think they need.
I have a small circle of focus on my own life. It’s working, and my life is getting better.
In my work, I focus on doing the best possible job. If I succeed at my job, then my customers’ lives are better. That’s how I make the world a better place. It gives me a reason to do my best every day.
What I do is design kitchens. I also bridge the gap between the plan and the execution of the plan. There are lots of little details to pay attention to. When I get everything right, people get new kitchens.
With kitchens the way they want them, they eat well. They have peace in their house. They have social space to invite people over. Everything works smoothly, and they have a solid building block to build their own lives on.
If I try to do more, I might fuck it up. This task of making kitchen rebuild projects go well is the perfect balance between my own competence and the needs of the world. It takes everything I’ve got.
Having the match between my mission and my skills, having the mission be just hard enough to take everything I’ve got, is my own personal recipe for not falling into despair at the state of the world. The thing that bothers me the most is if one of my customers has a problem. I worry more about that than I do about Gaza.
Unlike most, I don’t believe its possible (or even a very good idea) to ignore the news. What I do is limit my news source to two places a day, BBC and The Guardian which I know are not perfect but I believe they can be largely trusted. Other than that, I read the odd link on here but I won’t doom scroll.
I also do things that have a tangible effect for people who have it worse than me. Hands on in my immediate locality, and via donation nationally and/or internationally. I have a list of charities that I support and donate to two for 6 months then switch to another two and repeat. Doing this means that most importantly, people are helped in some small way and less importantly it offsets the shitness of life a bit. If I can feel a bit happy that I’m doing something, that’s a good thing.
I compartmentalize. Focus on things at a smaller scale, and work through them one by one. Try not to distract yourself too much on the things that are out of your control. Prioritize the ones that you can actually control. Then identify the short term and long term ones and further prioritize based on that.
I got Sync for Lemmy because Sync for reddit used to be great and I refuse to create a reddit account. I’m mostly here for porn.
If you’re not here for porn, you probably haven’t come to terms with how inconsequential you are. Once you come to that realization you start doing doing things for yourself and things get better.
I enjoy walking my dog (usually) and sitting with my cat.
I spend way, way more time exercising than is normal or mentally healthy probably, but it’s been my coping mechanism for years and I leaned into it.
I try to invite friends over when people have time. It’s not often. I’m that age where people are starting to get married and have kids and move away.
I’m miserable most of the time. I try to ignore the shitty politics, the news, the cost of housing, the cost of food, the quicksand it feels like we are all slowly sinking into.
I’ve decided I’m never having kids. They don’t deserve to be forced to exist in this.
The only consolation I’ve found is an answer to a similar post to this on Reddit a couple years ago - someone in their 60s or so was explaining that for what it’s worth, the world is always on fire if you only focus on that part. They grew up in the cold war, doing bomb shelter drills and hearing how they were going to get nuked by Russia. The economy has its issues then. The government has its issues then. I think those issues are worse now, but honestly who knows. You have to look for moments of brightness and try to avoid focusing on the morass of terribleness that everyone is trying to shove down your throat. It’s not easy. But the alternative is worse.
I’m trying to enjoy things while they last and appreciate how precious they are, especially nature. Sometimes I wonder whether I should be preparing for the brutal future that is to come, since there is no avoiding famine, draughts, mass migrations and wars that the climate change will cause. But we don’t have enough information about what exactly will happen, and since humans have an unbelievable ability to adapt, it can be left for the future. so the only thing I can do now is create memories and spend time with loved ones so I’m not full of regrets once we lose everything
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