like any other celebrity
nyoooom, Carpenters were pretty rich back then
rob64, Well in that case I’ll have a rum and Coca-Cola.
terminhell, It’s worse than this: Somehow he decided to live amongst the peasants, but put on this big show about; but ‘how do ya do fellow plebs?’. In some twisted logic, Jesus is somehow the son and the father, at the same time, but different.
Twelve20two, Also: ghost
MonsiuerPatEBrown, “pretends to be poor” == “not into conspicuous consumption”
kautau, I mean yeah if I could turn water into wine…
MyNameIsIgglePiggle, I rum a distillery and literally turn water into spirits. I just add a bit of yeast and sugar and boil that bad boy.
Guess I should call myself rum Jesus.
neptune, Judging by the glasses, this is a 2012 meme judging hipsters for inconspicuous consumption.
Cruxifux, Started from the bottom now we here
Mordred_85, Your’d better shut up, so you know who’s my dad?
killeronthecorner, 
Oh yeah his family is loaded, I heard they named a chapel after him
queermunist, 
To be fair his dad abandoned him with his mother and then set him up to die for basically no reason. Kinda an asshole.
EherVielleicht, Not even an ‘hang in there buddy’.
Kalkaline, 
Nailed it
0ops, The comment should be pinned to this post
Kalkaline, It was a great execution, but I have to wash my hands of any participation in a pun thread.
0ops, I’ll wash your feet
Twelve20two, Dad turned his phone off for an afternoon after he got woken up by an essay length text message sent in the middle of the night before
ininewcrow, 
You mean he abandoned himself, or is it themselves?
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