Hmm... what to say ?
Wilshire, So that’s why my wife sleeps all day…
HubertManne, 
Blanket is most important part of bed. Will take thick soft blanket on floor over bed with no blanket.
comador, 
Bed has bugs in it…
tubaruco, thats what happens when no open source
UlfKirsten, Hmm that you only meant well?
SwingingTheLamp, Bed: I’m in it to win it!
aaaa,
DancingIsForbidden, 
I see you pop culture reference and I raise you: Death Bed: The Bed That Eats
CCF_100, I’m looking at this image while in bed
dan1101, Bed doesn’t tell you negative things
Bed doesn’t ask you to do things
Holzkohlen, That what the voices are for. The voices follow me to bed too.
notasandwich1948, me reading this while still in bed
ViscloReader, Your free subscription regarding Google bed + has ended, please accept ads or consider subscribing to the service. The bed will be unusable after three nap without Google bed +
GFGJewbacca, Shhhhh, don’t give them ideas.
roembol, Don’t worry they’ll just discontinue it in a few years
ooterness,
PeriodicallyPedantic, When you grow older, you will feel the betrayal of the bed. You will wake sore all over as though your bed beat you while you slept. Back, hips, shoulders, neck, all targets of the bed.
candyman337, Not to mention if you don’t wash your sheets often enough, the sinus issues
PunnyName, That’s gravity. Bed is doing its best to help you fight gravity. Bed is ride or die. Bed loves you. Do not besmirch bed.
PeriodicallyPedantic, Sure, and if I fall off a cliff, the ground at the bottom is just trying to help me stay out of the earth’s core 😏
PunnyName, Ground isn’t soft. And ground has much more gravity than bed.
OyenFuton, Aragonese 
That being said, once in a while I’d take a stick and beat the shit out of the bed to remind it who’s actually the boss.
My denial is probably acting up again
Edit: My dumb phone autocorrecting me
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