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ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to asklemmy in Have you ever failed at something? How did you get back up after that?

I had a six-month-long marriage. My ex-wife was not a nice person and everyone else could see it almost immediately, but I was swept away by how determined to be with me she was. It felt so good to have a woman who was attractive, successful, and very, very interested in me. Too good to be true, as it turned out. I’m not sure exactly what was wrong with her - something like borderline personality disorder? Once I committed to her, she became very jealous and would go from sweet to angry frequently and with no provocation. Although she only ever yelled at me, I was scared of her.

I’ve made mistakes in my life that were good for me because they were learning experiences. My marriage wasn’t one of them - I wish that it had never happened. However, I did still learn from it:

  1. Don’t look down so much on people who make obvious, foolish mistakes. You might end up as one of them. I didn’t think I was the kind of person who would ever get divorced but here I am…
  2. Admitting that you made a big mistake feels terrible, but the real problem is the big mistake, not the admission of it. I was a fool to be married for just six months, but I would have been a bigger fool if I stayed in that marriage longer than that. I’m still ashamed that I married my ex, but I’m proud that I had the courage to leave.
  3. Time does heal wounds. All my hopes and dreams about the future with her were garbage, my judgement was no better than that of a daytime talk-show guest, and my humiliation was known to every single person who was important to me, since they were all at my wedding. Then years passed, and while I still haven’t spoken to some more distant relatives simply because I don’t want to explain that I’m not with my ex-wife any more, I have in fact moved on with my life.
ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to baldurs_gate_3 in What having a bard in the party is like

Use more save or sucks.

How are you getting reliable success with any spell that allows for a saving throw? I’m seeing pretty terrible odds with my bard’s offensive enchantment spells (on Tactician difficulty).

ArbitraryValue, to asklemmy in What are some small things we should change about the human body?

5v USB charging port.

ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to asklemmy in Ancient wisdom often sounds like common sense now that it is commomly taught. What is some ancient wisdom that we no longer teach because it was wrong?

I read Montaigne’s essays (written in the 1500’s) and while his views are remarkably modern in many ways, one thing that stuck out to me was how unabashedly elitist he is. The translation I had used the phrase “common herd” to refer to the large majority of people who failed to impress him due to their lack of education or strength of character. I hesitate to speak for him since I think he was a wiser man than I am, but I expect that our modern notions about democracy would have seemed ridiculous to him. He might accept that universal suffrage is in practice the least-bad option currently available to us, but he would argue that at least in principle it would be better to exclude people who don’t actually know how to run a country from the process of deciding how the country is to be run.

(He would also be unashamed to say that the life of an exceptional person is worth more than the life of someone ordinary, but we think that in the modern day too. We just consider it rude to be so explicit about it.)

ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to comicstrips in When Fallout asks you to make difficult choices

I hate how crafting systems work in most games…

What I want: meaningful decisions about how to customize my character’s equipment.

What I get: clicking all over the place like it’s a 90’s adventure game to collect pieces of shit so that I can put together a giant turd.

ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to risa in A good grade at parties

Isn’t that how most people socialize at parties? Some people can do it naturally, but I figure most people are pretending. I frequently ask myself “What would a normal human do in this situation?”

ArbitraryValue, to historyporn in Yankee Claus giving toys to British children from his tank, Perham Downs, England, WW2, 1942

What is that tank? The big, fixed, off-center gun is interesting…

ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to memes in Put the fish down.

Nobody really knows why that’s supposed to attract a potential dating partner, but it’s really common

Back when I did online dating I wrote about playing computer games, not because I expected that to be attractive to the average woman (of course it isn’t) but because I was hoping to meet one of the rare women who shared my interest.

A friend of mine managed to marry a woman who agreed to have their honeymoon be a week-long canoe trip through the wilderness in Maine, complete with living off of the fish they caught. It can happen!

ArbitraryValue, to upliftingnews in 5 wolves released in Colorado as part of reintroduction plan

I can’t help but laugh because apparently Democrats have voted to release large predators into the parts of the state where Republicans live.

ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to memes in he hate the tomate

hāt tomāt

Tomatoes were one of the few things my dog wouldn’t eat.

ArbitraryValue, to comicstrips in I can cook at least

For some reason I get ads promising ugly women. Does that mean I’m hot?

ArbitraryValue, to memes in Is your life on track?

I wish the track my life is on went through a nice peaceful forest like that :)

ArbitraryValue, (edited ) to lemmyshitpost in the Perks of ownership...

The guy on the right is carefree and full of joy compared to a guy who walks to the auto-parts store.

ArbitraryValue, to memes in And now I'm concerned

So drinking a real-world cow’s milk is ok, but drinking a Zootopia cow’s milk would not be ok because… the Zootopia cow is presumably a full member of society who earns a living by consensually being milked?

ArbitraryValue, to lemmyshitpost in But I eat when I'm sad

this is just sad

Just as planned.

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