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RBWells, to asklemmy in How does one be a good mod?

Well, a rude user being rude is not a surprise.

I would say: Reasonable rules, not many, clearly and obviously stated, evenly applied.

RBWells, to asklemmy in Is it actually possible to change your personality

Yes.

My ex was a chill stoner who got radicalized on the internet and became an abusive alcoholic raging racist, then got sober but is still an angry right wing asshole.

I was selfish/self-centered as fuck as a teenager and gained patience and perspective over time, I think most people do change in that way, become more aware of others, nicer. Not everyone, obviously. But most.

RBWells, to asklemmy in So how much "bad" debt are you in?

Bad, as a % of annual gross pay is about 25% of one year’s pay. Mostly the deficit accrued from when my ex was not working. It’s smaller than it was, but not by much. But moving in the right direction at least.

Plus mortgage on the house and a separate loan for the roof we had put on when we bought it.

RBWells, to asklemmy in What piece of song lyric you can really relate to?

There are so many. Father John Misty, the cheeky bastard, writes lyrics so well. In Goodbye Mr. Blue -

When the last time was our last time, if only then I knew that the last time was our last time, would have told you that the last time comes too soon.

And from The Head and the Heart back when they were making magic with Josiah Johnson -

The world keeps spinning, a little too fast. If we don’t slow down soon it might not last. So just for a moment, just for a moment, let’s be still.

RBWells, to asklemmy in What are some must-haves on your Halloween music playlist?

I have a 108 song Halloween playlist!

Agree with the Misfits Halloween.

Some you may not have considered:

If You Were Still Around - John Cale

Vampire - Claudia Schmidt

Careful with that Axe, Eugene - Pink Floyd

What’s he Building? - Tom Waits

Rockin’ Bones - The Cramps

Zombie - Maitre Gims

RBWells, to asklemmy in Does noone train their dogs anymore?

We train ours to walk at heel, loose leash. But if they are together they will still pull and bark aggressively at other dogs. They are in training, not completely trained.

I’m not sure what you mean by properly, though. I would consider the dog walking close to me & slightly behind a good trained walk, and do if possible cross to avoid giving them temptation if there is a dog. Better to give them a chance to be good, than to have to correct them.

Is there a dog scene?

RBWells, to asklemmy in How long would you live if electricity for the whole world went out permanently?

If given enough notice to store water and fill 3 good coolers with ice, longer than 2 weeks - we lost power for 2 weeks with a hurricane once and had an electric well pump so no water either. Had set up a system with one cooler allowed to be opened, the others not often. By 2 weeks the water that we’d filled the tub with (for washing not drinking - water with a little bit of bleach) was getting questionable.

Like you, I think the biggest issue would be people.

RBWells, to mildlyinteresting in Ancient Iran had air conditioning

Heat pump doesn’t do that for us. We set it at 78-79f in the summer and it feels cool enough & keeps the house from molding.

Evaporative systems like the one pictured only work in the desert though. So if you have lots of water, it’s humid and you can’t use evaporation to cool, but in places you can use evaporative cooling, water is scarce. It’s still very cool tech, and everywhere can benefit from more intentional design of buildings.

RBWells, to asklemmy in How fluent do you think one have to be to be considered "bilingual"?

I would say if you are both fluent and sometimes think in both languages (not translating when you talk) you are bilingual. So yes you are bilingual not ‘just fluent’, though in my opinion being fluent without visiting an English speaking country is quite an accomplishment.

RBWells, to asklemmy in What's your real-life superpower?

I’ll have to go back & look at pictures but no I don’t think so. I was tall for my age though, but since it was always mixed age groups, don’t think it was a literal ‘standing out’. But yes - kissed by the whale, the dolphin, the birds, walked tightrope, swung on trapeze, tried to juggle, every show at every theme park, every time.

RBWells, to asklemmy in What's your real-life superpower?

In real life people trust me, even if they don’t know me. It’s the middle aged white lady superpower. Apparently we are the group of people who are deployed to do surveys about personal habits, health, sex, because people trust us.

When younger (and still to some extent) I also seem to get picked out of crowds way more often than statistically normally for things where performers are choosing someone from a crowd. My mom thought it was remarkable, there could be a thousand kids in an audience but always I was picked out to go on stage. And no, I am not exceptional looking, it was not due to looks.

RBWells, to asklemmy in Is it normal for a person to "feel" less as they get older?

I don’t know about normal, but I have more than 50 years and not jaded yet - the dish soap making bubbles still delights me, the beautiful sky makes me stop and stare, the smell of the night blooming jasmine, the world is just so incredible I don’t know how anybody can really get used to it. Like, the fact that you get to exist at all, with consciousness and a physical body, it’s not something I can take for granted.

Now if you mean am I more busy or distracted now? I think again the answer is no but I didn’t like childhood and have enjoyed being an adult.

I would suggest a dream journal and trying to lucid dream, if your waking self has lost its sense of wonder

RBWells, to asklemmy in Does anyone actually enjoy working out?

It depends. Running and lifting I enjoy the results but the activity is boring, I never got runners high.

Jazzercise was fun fun fun though, any sort of dance aerobics like that is perfect because have to pay just the right amount of attention to it - enough that I can’t think about other things, but not so much that I really have to think hard about the movements. I wish there were still classes by me.

Yoga is fun too, in a different way. It takes concentration, always adjustments to posture, and it’s very empowering to be able to do handstands or other arm balances, it’s challenging in a good way and the reminders to coordinate your breath with movement is helpful.

So for me it depends on what the workout is but sure, I like moving physically, enjoy it and don’t do it only for results.

RBWells, to asklemmy in What are some reddit communities you wish to see live and more active on lemmy?

Normalnudes

IntermittentFasting

NoSleep

Written erotica, any of them.

The general “Music” and “Movie” threads because I did discover stuff on them as well as being able to suggest stuff.

But have been satisfied with some of these that are still small but growing - curlyhair, science fiction, cocktails (mine now), fermentation and sourdough. And overall happy to give up the faster moving subs and be here for the beginning time.

RBWells, to maliciouscompliance in [REPOST] That one time my son was sent home because of dress code violation at school.

This reminds me of two similar incidents - My mom never advocated for me in school. Like never. Until one day in high school I wore a miniskirt on a game day (on game days the cheerleaders were in really short skirted uniforms). I got in trouble at lunch for the outfit, but just pointed at a cheerleader and said "her skirt is a lot shorter than mine.". Got sent to the office, my mom picked me up, I figured I was in trouble but no. She told the principal she agreed with me and no she didn't bring another outfit. We went home.

And at a job, we got a dress code because people were showing up in pyjamas. One of the rules was this weird "4 fingers neckline" no deep necklines? One of our accountants was an older, very old school black man, proper and nerdy and nice. He heard the 4 fingers speech, started grumbling. Later when I passed his desk he had printed out 4 copies of Johnny Cash giving the finger right at the camera, and he just looked at me and said "four fingers!"

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