Since you added the hours left, the whole (not-)pooping thing sounds way more serious now. Damn, maybe if you added some countdown timer, I’d stop laughing.
You’re putting so much effort to avoid pooping… but you should put the same effort into making sure that once this whole thing is over, there’s a toilet you can sit on for a few hours without being interrupted. If I was you, I’d choose one in advance and call there for a reservation.