phorq

@phorq@lemmy.ml

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phorq,

He didn’t leave the matrix yet?

phorq,

The problem is that they actually don’t mean that. And truthfully I don’t mind the idea of paying for video hosting, that shit’s expensive, but YouTube is going about it in the worst way possible.

phorq,

Do you have a problem? If yes, then it should consume your thoughts so you don’t have any ability to think of a solution… If no, then you must’ve forgotten something…

phorq,

The file extension is exe, am I doing something wrong?

phorq,

Chupa… can you imagine that being a kids movie?

phorq,

According to the questionable celebrity health statistics website I found… Danny DeVito is 70kg, which is 11 stone… So it’s more like the chef lost almost 1.9 Danny DeVitos. We Americans may have weird measuring systems, but we take them seriously!

phorq,

Is it wrong for me to say that the pessimism with a side of alcohol is the most British you could possibly describe being merry?

phorq,

F*****x, I edged so hard I chromed all over myself…

phorq,

Is this that “alchemy” thing I’ve heard so much about?

phorq,

Chef Boyardeez arms tired from opening all those cans…

phorq,

Dude made a fortune on merch, I see red shirts and grey hoodies all the time

phorq,

Thanks! You’re hot too, dawg!

phorq,

I don’t believe you, do you have video evidence of this?

phorq,

If everyone sucks at driving, odds are that you do too (I’m not excluding myself from this). Most people just don’t realize it. But yes some people are more stupid than others…

phorq, (edited )

Well sure, but if you think about the fact that there are 8.1 billion people in the world and then consider that if you’re really lucky you might live to 100… That’s (365 × 100) × (60k ÷ 8.1b) × (100%)… You only have a 27% chance of dying this way… Honestly didn’t expect it to be that high.

phorq,

I doubt my math is correct, I always sucked at statistics, but if you were to convert my previous nonsense you wouldn’t multiply by 365 since you already have the yearly rate rather than the daily rate so it would be: (100) × (500 ÷ 333,287,557) × (100%) = 0.015%

phorq,

It’s only dissociative if the identities aren’t getting along.

phorq,

PlayStation Zero is better than Diet PlayStation and it’s still 0 calories (assuming you don’t try to eat it…)

phorq,

The cow says “meow this guy knows his memes!”

phorq,

Missed opportunity to make that a gif that moves slightly…

phorq,

You forgot to take into account leap years or as I’ve come to call them the leaping gnu/years

phorq,

Why am I getting Bobobo vibes? There better not be an epic battle of ass hair vs pubic hair happening just outside…

phorq,

Proceeds to eat all the fish and do a surprisingly sophisticated double-backwards-somersault through a hoop whilst whistling the ‘Star Spangled Banner’ as thanks before leaving dolphin man behind on earth…

phorq,

It’s always Sunny in Alabama

phorq,

Does skydiving without a parachute count as a jumpscare? Because I feel like there’s not much to fear except death in that situation…

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