What exercises can I do to strengthen my willpower?

I’ve realized that I’m very mentally weak and it’s impacting my success.
I suspect I have ADHD and whenever I get an urge to distract myself, I rarely manage to resist it.
I think what I am missing is the residtance to discomfort that eg. allows sports people to carry on going even when their muscles are telling them to stop. Or the thing that allows people to defy themselves and step into an ice-cold shower.

Unfortunately I am not a person who enjoys sports and a cold shower is only something that makes sense once a day. Can you think of any exercises that I can do here and now in my room, and practice routinely that will strengthen my willpower so that I can better resist my urges in the future?

PlutoniumAcid,
@PlutoniumAcid@lemmy.world avatar

I have found it useful, even healthy in stressfulness work situations, to allow myself the distraction - but only for a little while. This works fairly well for me.

Do one other thing. Play only one round of Minesweeper (yes, that’s me). Read only one thing on Lemmy. Pick one of those. Then get back to work. For a while, anyway.

jandar_fett,

If I am trying to get things done (write emails) do important research, ya know that kind of thing, I sprinkle in the things I want to do like procrastinate on lemmy, look up random shit, eat a snack, and then get back to the work at hand

001100010010,
@001100010010@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Hold in your poop for 3 days.

Jellojiggle,

“Just do it” is such easy advice to give but I feel your pain OP. There are things I want to accomplish that I CANNOT get myself up to do. I can’t execute plans or schedules for things that don’t immediately threaten my livelihood. It’s a real PITA. Executive dysfunction is a term I’ve read about recently that describes this.

I’m convinced the way we think about things is the driving force. For example, I’ve always struggled to work out regularly. What’s really been helping me the last month is the mantra “I’ll never regret working out but I absolutely will regret not working out”. So try to critically evaluate your thought processes behind the things you want to accomplish and see if there is another way of thinking about it that makes doing it easier.

SubArcticTundra,
@SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml avatar

I really like your mantra – yeah it really helps me when thoughts like this reframe the way I look at things. I often struggle with being paralized by guilt, for example the guilt of having put an email off for too long, or tge fear that starting ti revise for my exams now would make me feel guilty that I didn’t start preparing earlier. I wish I had a similar mantra for that

Jellojiggle,

Yes! The guilt eats you alive and completely paralyzes you! I never could figure out what made me tick to help improve my study habits. But I just graduated so I managed and now I’m done forever! You will always wish you started sooner, no matter how early you start.

For little things like emails, consider how they take barely 5 mins to do. We have 1,440 minutes in a day and we can’t even take 5 to send the freaking email?! I use that mindset for chores too. I gripe and moan about the kitty litter box but it takes 60 seconds to just scoop the damn thing.

SubArcticTundra,
@SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml avatar

Ahh putting it into perspective does sound like it would help me. Unfortunately for me writing an email usually takes closer to 20 minutes because I’m really slow at phrasing what I have to say and I sit around stuck on trying to phrase my email in a way that doesn’t sound too commanding/impolite/etc . Have you ever had this? It might be an ADHD thing idk.

Jellojiggle,

I’ve experienced that as well with emails. I’ve gotten faster over the years because of the amount I’ve had to send but have definitely spent 30+ minutes writing some of them. I will write it and then read it out loud to myself to make sure it makes sense and, like you said, doesn’t sound rude or aggressive. Realistically, no matter how careful you are people still might misinterpret it. I’ve never been diagnosed or sought to be diagnosed with ADHD so it’s hard to say. I’m too stubborn to seek a diagnosis and try meds because it’s just one more thing for me to forget to do 😅

jandar_fett,

Don’t overthink it. That helps me. Obviously match your phrasing to the situation like if it needs to be formal, be formal, but if not then just write it out and send it.

Poggers,

I always get myself to do things I don’t want to by thinking “Future-me is going to be much happier when he finds that present-me did this already.”

Helps me find the motivation to exercise, make myself a good cup of coffee instead of a kcup, do the dishes after dinner, lots of things. And past me is such a bro, saved me from present-me having to do those things.

SubArcticTundra,
@SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml avatar

I’ve tried this before but it hasn’t worked for me so far unfortunately :-/ I thunk it’s because my brain sees tomorrow-me to be a different and detached person…

Candelestine,

This is going to be funny, but … edging yourself during masturbation.

SubArcticTundra, (edited )
@SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml avatar

Heh I guess I can see how that helps. Because I was thinking something along the lines of forcing myself to close a YT video half way through, which is essentially the same effect. (Not that YT videos make me orgasm or anything lol)

bilb,
@bilb@lem.monster avatar

Man, I haven’t seen any articles about how gooning can improve your willpower but I think i⁰ts only a matter of time.

_haha_oh_wow_,
@_haha_oh_wow_@sh.itjust.works avatar

Delayed gratification.

Ooops,
@Ooops@feddit.de avatar

Close this tab right now and promise yourself never come back to see if someone gave you an easy answer…

SubArcticTundra,
@SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml avatar

That would require some one time mental strength but would also make this post a bit pointless…(?)

DJDarren,

Trouble is, many of the techniques here are easy. But if you have ADHD, sticking to them is damn near impossible.

Granixo,
@Granixo@feddit.cl avatar

Watch all of the Rocky movies 🥊

simon574,

What is it you are distracting yourself from? The low motivation could also be that you are not really believing in a goal or you are not enjoying a task because you would rather do something else with your time. As others already said if you “suspect” you have ADHD you could also try therapy.

candle_lighter,
@candle_lighter@lemmy.ml avatar

A good morning routine is perfect for building momentum. I wake up at 6 AM and walk to my bathroom where I keep a bottle of water, as I am always thirsty in the morning. I brush my teeth, meditate, and engage in some light cardio, (literally something like 50 jumping jacks. It’s nothing too serious) Afterward, I take a warm shower, gradually lowering the temperature until it’s cold. Finally, I eat breakfast.

That’s a morning routine that works for me and is (mostly) copied from a Youtube video I watched on how to stay motivated. This is what works for me so I think it may be a good watch www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOEfDcGbbXo&t=362

jandar_fett,

Bro, not everybody is a morning person. I appreciate you sharing what works for you, but for one if OP does in fact have ADHD, that comes with insomnia sometimes so it is unlikely they’ll be getting up early, and if they do, they won’t want to do jumping jacks or take a morning shower regardless of the temp. Also, breakfast is hit or miss too because people with ADHD also have symptoms of depression and anxiety so they’re stomachs won’t be prepared for that probably.

lntl,
@lntl@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

Buy yourself a pack of cigarettes.

Smoke one, I promise it will be disgusting. Later that day, will yourself outside to smoke another. Repeat 2 or 3 times a day until the pack is gone. Live this way and be addicted to nicotine for a year. After a year, do it in reverse and quit.

Afterwards, you’ll be able to will anything into reality.

foggy,

Siiiigh. I don’t wanna. It’s true though.

Cold showers.

Especially after warm shower for the first half.

You should aim to barely be reacting. Focus on your breathing to distract your whole nervous system from the feeling of discomfort the cold water brings.

You’re training your body to not react to adverse events. To roadblocks, to shitty situations, to things that might otherwise derail you.

Cold showers are key.

Or, ya know… Batting cages.

SubArcticTundra,
@SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml avatar

Or, ya know… Batting cages.

Bruh this is precisely the sort of training I need

Kolanaki,
@Kolanaki@yiffit.net avatar

I’ve always felt that my willpower is the only thing I have any strength in. The trouble is, that in order to exercise my will, I must concentrate on doing so. With ADHD focusing on anything can be hard as fuck if there’s too many distractions. So I eliminate the distractions (or as many as I possibly can).

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