Little late to the party, but I was trying to catch a flight to see my long distance boyfriend. I was supposed to leave right after class (I was in college) but decided to take my time and run by my house to pick up a few things and chat with my roommates. Well, there was a ton of traffic and I ended up having to sprint through the airport to my gate. I had a backpack and was sprinting in flip flops, wearing a dress. Didn’t feel my dress riding up, caught in my backpack, as I ran, so I guarantee half that airport saw my bare ass (I now wear shorts under my dresses). Got to the gate as the plane was pulling away from the gate and started SOBBING, knowing my kind of dick boyfriend would yell at me and say I told you so. The gate agents took pity on me, crying with my butt hanging out, and moved me to a next morning flight at no charge.
So I’m not sure how applicable this is - I’m a programmer, and I’m not neurotypical - but here’s how it works for me
If this, then that. When a certain trigger happens, I’ve conditioned myself to stop my train of thought and reevaluate
When I realize I’m uncomfortable or agitated, I first ask myself “am I dehydrated? Am I overheated?”. If not, I look at the situation… If I’m talking to someone and feel agitated, is it because of something that happened earlier today, is it because I’m just in a mood, or is there any other reason this is a me thing, and snapping at them would be unfair.
It’s a lot of introspection, and I’m not sure it applies to someone who doesn’t need coping mechanisms like this… But here’s how it applies to logical fallacies:
If someone says something I feel is wrong, first I ask myself, why do I think that?
Maybe I’ve been taught wrong. I first heard the vaccines cause autism from a parent who said “I think he was susceptible, and the shock to his system from the vaccines triggered his autism”. On it’s face, that made sense - it wasn’t until a coworker sighed and walked away after a comment I made that I googled it, and there was evidence against it and none for it, so I changed my mind immediately. I had no facts, one opinion by someone with a personal stake in it, and so I was wrong.
So if I only “know” a thing because I was told or because I assumed it, I immediately pull out my phone and look for evidence. You can do it very quick with practice, and people generally respond well when you take them seriously - either you go “huh, I guess you’re right” and they’re all smiles, or you show them what you found and go into the conversation with sources - either they can refute the source or you know they’re ignoring the numbers
So now, let’s say you’re arguing something not so clear-cut, I have a reason to believe what I do based on facts, but the answer isn’t obvious.
So first off, I don’t care if you’re the surgeon general or an anonymous Lemmy poster - ideas matter, people don’t. The only time you trust authority is when you aren’t able to understand the issue - and that comes up plenty, but it has no place in a conversation about the issue - you should be trying to understand ideas if you’re talking about it. If they bring up a person, that’s not an actual argument… Just ignore the names and the titles.
Hitler was right about some things, George Washington was wrong about some things - pretending otherwise is dumb. I’m on Hitler’s side about interior design… Nazi stuff looks imposing and regal. I’m also Jewish, so I’m not exactly a fan of the guy. Ideas matter, where they come from has nothing to do with anything
Next, is “if I can’t understand why someone would do/think this, I’m missing facts”. If you can’t give me a solid argument for the other side, I take everything you say about the topic with a grain of salt. No one is evil in their own story, no one takes a hilariously bad stance just because they’re dumb… They have a reason to think that way, and if I can’t understand why, then I’m missing something.
And if I’m missing something, it’s foolish to make up my mind before I hear what that is.
Then you get to the actual arguments. I lay it out in my head. I break down the individual statements - do they make sense individually? Are they actually related to each other?
Most of all, it’s important to see the difference between winning the argument and making a point. I’m not a great speaker - i don’t remember specifics well, I remember my conclusions. I lose arguments all the time, and I pride myself on the fact that if I realize I’m wrong, I’ll turn on a dime and own up to it.
But winning an argument and being right are almost unrelated things.
Finally, go back and fact check. The argument might be long over, but the goal should always be to understand better and gain a deeper perspective - follow up for your own sake
So my advice is: stop, reevaluate, and refocus. Every time something doesn’t sound right to you, take a minute. Take a breath, remember your goal, and decide if what you’ve just been told changes that.
It’s easy to get buried in details or lost in the heat of the moment, so make a habit of taking yourself out of it
I think it has always been like this. We have always been on the edge of progress or total destruction. You may want to watch the Oppenheimer movie as the fears we have now about end of the world, were the same then, maybe even worse.
Throughout history people have worried about the end and while they are not wrong to have concern as there are just so many vectors to take us out, some self inflicted, we have survives and thrived. Fearing the doom scenario seems normal but we have been doing for so long despite doing so well on so many key metrics overall that I think this reality needs to be the focus. Although, I did read a paper once that said worry is just mother-natures way of ensuring we avoid bad things by making them uncomfortable. Maybe we all need to lean into the uncomfortableness as it will come to us sooner than later anyways.
That's how I've been feeling for years now, intensified with the fact that there's not enough being done even as things escalate faster than expected. As someone with lifelong anxiety and depression, what I've learned is to not focus on my own helplessness and lack of self-worth, but instead what I can do and contribute in any little way to any person or creature. It's up to every one of us to give our own life meaning, and I'm trying to choose kindness.
While climate is new, corruption among ruling classes is a story as old as civilization.
Was living ever motivated?
Well, one of the differences between now and then is the access to bad information.
If you were living in a village and a village far away from you was all killed off, maybe you’d hear about it eventually.
Today, you’d be able to see photos the same day.
So online access is overstimulating your “wow this is screwed” circuitry in ways you wouldn’t have experienced decades, centuries, millennia ago.
Maybe a bit of a break from online news would be helpful.
The world has always sucked and had issues. But you were just way less likely to be constantly aware of it.
If anything, the past few years show some incredible promise for things changing in terms of corruption among ruling classes, even if the climate is long term going to completely screw us.
But humanity was never going to last forever, and whether or not you are part of the last hurrah for the species shouldn’t necessarily detract from your experience in the here and now of it.
Find your own meaning and path on a relative basis, and be less caught up in existential dread, especially given there’s little benefit to absorbing yourself in the latter.
Our lives, too, have meaning beyond these issues. The relationships we form, the joy we find in our passions, the simple pleasures we get from a beautiful day or a good meal - these things matter. They give us strength to face the larger problems of our world.
And in the face of these problems, we can find a purpose. Many people find fulfillment in dedicating themselves to fighting for a better future. Whether that’s in climate change activism, social justice, or just in being a kinder, more understanding person, we can all make a difference.
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