Dreams where I’m someone completely different. Doesn’t matter which gender or whatever, just that I’m living a different life. I sometimes have dreams where I have a very consistent identity, like I know I am that person.
I don’t mean for this to sound depressing, my own life is fine. I just really like pretending to be different people :)
My wife and I are poly. Neither of us have found a long term person yet (Wife isn’t really looking because she is graysexual and doesn’t really want any additional deep emotional connections), but we’ve met a few great people who probably could have worked but for one or two incompatibilities. I’ve seen enough over the past two years to see that it definitely can work.
Wife isn’t really looking because she is graysexual and doesn’t really want any additional deep emotional connections
This kinda describes my wife’s boyfriend’s wife. (That was just fun to type out) Basically, because of the place and way she was raised, she didn’t understand that she was ace until she had two kids, and her sex life continued to exist. She was/is more or less done with that part of her life. She has two kids and a husband and a home, and that’s why she was having sex to begin with. As long as she has those things, she doesn’t care that her husband does things she does not enjoy with some other women. She’s happy with the way her life is. Plz don’t make her add sex back into the equation.
Poly was actually my wife’s idea for many of the reasons you list above. It’s not just sex though, my wife is also not a touchy feely person, and I am, as she calls me, a cuddle monster. Thankfully we are good at communicating and deeply love each other, and so were able to navigate all of this without arguing, yelling, etc…
A poster with pictures of airplanes, that you hang up on his playroom wall. And then you look at the planes together and name them every time you visit. That’s awesome fun for a 3 year old.
Op… their transparent lie about not wanting to pay 1 pound a day to turn the electricity on should have told you to walk away let alone the structural issues.
Yeah I took the explanation at face value, at first… but the more I think about it, in conjunction with not turning the water on it feels very much like they’re trying to pull a fast one.
Walk away NOW. If the issues are known ahead of purchase insurance won’t cover them. You do NOT want to have to declare subsidence on your insurance quotes - most brokers just won’t cover you. Almost everything you said is a huge red flag and there are probably more “nice surprises” to come. If you have a mortgage approved already then go and find another property.
If this is your dream house, at least get a building & contents insurance quote before you go any further. You don’t want any further surprises.
Edit: source: bought a money-pit house, thought we had subsidence, we didn’t but it was a huge hassle and a lot of stress regardless. We got a bonus moth infestation out of it, though!
The mortgage offer is until Aprl 2024, so there is still 5 or 6 months left. These responses are exactly the kind of experienced advice I was looking for, thanks
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