Why do most people refuse to accept that they are wrong
I have come across a lot’s of people like these. like 99% of them. Sometimes it makes me think twice if what i am saying is wrong? What’s wrong with them. Is it so hard to swallow your pride and acknowledge that the other person is speaking facts? When they come to know they are wrong they proceed to insult/make fun of others to save their ass. Just why?
Because most people have their own idea of what is morally right in the world, and they want to cling onto that regardless of what other perspectives may exist. Both sides do this.
Also, in some cases, speaking the truth about something leads to them losing their jobs or livelihoods.
“It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it.” - Upton Sinclair
Even though I believe I’m right, there’s always a possibility of being wrong. Learning to live with this realization hasn’t been easy since I really like being right and hate being wrong. I suppose lots of other people feel the same way.
No matter how hard I try, I am still wrong about a bunch of stuff, so it’s good to come to terms with this reality of life. Accepting it is easier than trying to fight against the inevitable. Once you realize you’re wrong, acknowledge your mistake, fix it, and move on.
I read a study several years ago which has disappeared, it was about why do anti vax people persist even after education. The authors conclusion briefly, stated it’s all about ego and identity. They can’t admit to themselves they were fooled
Because most people, when they’re showing someone else that they’re wrong, choose to twist the knife about it. Onlookers add in jeers and snark, making the experience of admitting one was wrong into an unnecessarily-painful shaming event.
People don’t want to admit they’re wrong, because our culture punishes people who admit they were wrong.
In the cases when a person speaks to me as if I am someone capable of admitting I’m wrong, when they treat it like it’s no big deal I just happen to be wrong, I have no trouble admitting it.
For me what works is to show me without much emotion. Like pointing out to someone they’ve got a leaf in their hair or something. If someone comes at me, with proof that I’m wrong, in the manner of a helpful friend pointing out something I can’t see from my vantage point, it really doesn’t hurt.
But when people are calling me evil, stupid, toxic, etc, I just want to dig in my heels. I might see that I’m wrong, and at that point stop arguing my point, but I won’t actually come out and acknowledge it.
Sometimes you have to cut your losses and leave a conversation. If it’s some rando on the internet, just walk away and try not to care what they think.
With people you know and respect, you’re gonna have to hunker down for the long haul. Remember, if you come off like a jerk, they’re going to be less likely to accept your argument. Be respectful of their position but ask probing questions. Let them see for themselves that they’re wrong.
if you come off like a jerk, they’re going to be less likely to accept your argument
Very true. Lots of people attempt to package two messages together:
You’re wrong about this
You’re worthless
Quite frankly, people should reject the second message, and people who try to package the first with the second should expect listeners to reject the whole package.
Honestly it’s probably better for people to reject that whole package of messages than to accept it, even if it means being wrong, because at least they won’t be taking that toxicity into their soul.
Someone who goes around trying to convey those messages together, to be accepted as a package, is themselves doing it wrong.
Ah, young grasshopper. You are now discovering the ways of the world. It is not enough simply to be right; one must be cool about it, too. Which unfortunately means not getting pissed off that the other person is talking bullshit, because that only makes whoever you’re talking to double down, no matter how pants-on-head their point is.
As to what is wrong with them and why: pride, and embarrassment.
It’s a cliche and also very hard advice to follow, but it’s true that the best thing to do is smile and walk away. Know that they know you know they’re wrong and an idiot, and take comfort in it.
Edit: It’s very hard. I struggle with it every day, including yesterday, and today. Just gotta keep trying, we’ll get it eventually, right?
religion exists because people are scared of admitting the thing they devoted their life too is fake and used to exploit you.
it only causes war, inequality, hate crimes, etc
positives from religion? you get the hope that you might go to heaven and do nothing forever (seriously whats your plan after heaven). OR you burn in hell if you make a mistake. oh and you get a specific yet contradictory moral compass to abide to except its interpreted to hate gays instead of pedophiles.
i hate religion, but i think religion should get the treatment the religious right give to the lgbt. religion should NEVER be acknowledged or practiced outside of personal closed doors. i never want to hear about it and it shouldnt influence anything ever. the different between lgbt and christians? christianity is a choice.
When trying to persuade someone of something, you need to talk to the elephant, not the rider (emotion, not logic). That’s why propaganda works so well and facts don’t.
Cognitive dissonance. Lots of people never learn and are never taught how to separate their ego from their knowledge. It doesn’t help that education still relies on punishing mistakes and failure.
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