intensely_human,

“Who’s making toast?”

RizzRustbolt,

“In case anything happens, I brought my mummification tools just in case.”

Etterra,

If anything goes wrong, tell my wife that I forgot to do the laundry.

Colour_me_triggered,

“I usually prefer isoflurane, but I’ll take a hit of this” only works if they don’t use isoflurane.

“So this was what it was like for my victims” if you want to go dark.

captain_aggravated,
@captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works avatar

I actually did this one.

I was having my wisdom teeth removed. I was like 23. The anesthesiologist was a cute little blonde chick. Apparently the last thing I said before I went under was “Man this girl is a real…knockout…”

I didn’t get her number.

Taringano,

Make comments unrelated to your actual procedure.

“hope the transplant goes well.” / “really looking forward to this m to f transition”

Mrkawfee,

“Smoke me a kipper, I’ll be back for breakfast”

LEONHART,

This. This is the one.

(Long live Ace Rimmer.)

bradorsomething,

“This could be a software problem, can we try turning me off and on again?”

ohlaph,

Man, that’s rough, fingers crossed for you yo!!!

Also, “I’ll see you in there.”

Daft_ish,

I only know when you wake up you ask, “what year is it.” If you can manage it.

null,

OP – can you please come back after the surgery and let us know that you’re okay?

phoenixz,

Yeah, as funny as this is, it would be even funnier if you got back

Treczoks,

I know where the gold is!

owenfromcanada,
@owenfromcanada@lemmy.world avatar

“What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical statement?”

kraftpudding,

(I know this is probably impossible, but it would be so funny)

Tell a knock knock joke, but only the first part. Don’t reveal the punchline, just pass out. So they work extra hard to keep you alive, because only then will they hear the punchline.

UtMan1988,

I endorse this one.

ChaoticNeutralCzech,

They won’t either way. You’ll wake up in a hospital room terribly confused and barely able to move. Most of the operating staff will not see you then.

Wogi,

It will eat them FOREVER

ours,

The first words are likely “thirsty”.

Vodik_VDK, (edited )

“Anesthetic awareness.”

Misconduct,

Kind of a dick move don’t you think?

Vodik_VDK,

No; dicks usually go in an oscilating or pendulous motion, while I simply go down.

BlueMagma,

Why are there people like you…

Vodik_VDK,

Because I felt my wisdom teeth get pulled, and because I identify as a problem.

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