So we were all gonna have a good time and get drunk but now all the money’s gone into the VLTs so there’s no drinkin or gettin drunk or nothing is … how she goes, apparently
Living in the “self esteem” part of Maslow’s pirimid when you are battling basic needs aka allergies, sleep, dehydration, dimentia, etc is a good way to be depressed. Focus on preservation of assets and restoring basic functions.
There’s so many problems, so much uncertainty about the future, it can sometimes feel overwhelming and you just shut down. If you have a counter full of dishes, even if you wash one dish you’ve technically made the situation better. Marginally sure, but still in the right direction. And if that’s where you can focus your attention it might provide some momentum to finish all of them. But if not, that’s fine too, you still made the situation a little better and sometimes that’s the best we can hope for.
I heard my partner’s dad working on some IKEA patio furniture or something in his backyard when he messed something up and yelled, “Nothing’s ever easy!” In the moment, it was hilarious. Then it was kind of sad. Then it was true. Many years later that shit still sticks with me. Nothing ever is fucking easy. And any time you feel like you’re getting a bit too sure of yourself or when you need to keep in mind everything you’ve gotten through so far, it’s good to remind yourself of that.
I don’t have the vocabulary for a good mantra like most of you. But a shoulder shrug and a “what are you gonna do about it” kind of noise is enough for me.
I made it through 100% of all the bad days, weeks and months in my life so far. I will also make it through the ones that have yet to come.
…and on my more cynical days, this follow-up:
And if, one day, I won’t survive a bad day, then it is not my f[%$]ng problem anymore.
I tried to have a more positive mantra, but eventually realized that sheer spite can be a powerful motivator in bad times, even more so than trying to stay “nice” to the rest of the world.
Anger is a really powerful motivator. I spent years of my life trying to shut down my anger from childhood. I had such a violent temper up to my mid-20s. Now I’m 40 and in a complete “dead-zone”. No motivation, no drive.
I’ve found I get most motivated when one of two things happen - I forget to take my anti-depressant for the day or I try to quit vaping. Both these things cause me to get irritable and both cause me to shift and do something.
P.S. Meth also motivates me but that’s not a long-term strategy worth pursuing as I’m trying to remain sober.
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