capt_wolf, Discord statuses after this announcement be like:
https://media.tenor.com/PnzMTPYIXj8AAAAM/idiocracy-baitin.gif
lowleveldata, Ridiculous! We should protest this by making Lemmy posts for announcing masturbations
ShitOnABrick, Yes annocement #1: im now mastrobating
BackOnMyBS, omg, pls! why??? im in bed trying to get sleepy so i can go to work with decent rest tomorrow, but instead, im in bed lmao because you guys want to start a ridiculous movement 😆
ShitOnABrick, (edited ) I was on the nyc subway when this happened. I was chilling browsing the Web when one my homies hit me up on discord and sent me a gif of a big musslely black man doing the thugshaker I then began to start furiously mastrobating to the picture of the big mussley blackman doing the thugshaker people started looking at me and saying things such as omg and stop it I then in a haste dropped my phone and one by one all the other men in the train started to furiously mastrobate too. My peenis was but a little stub at this point.by the end the entire train was filled with mastrobating men all hovered over one phone playing a gif of a man doing the thugshaker. Be warned @I’m back on my bs you may suffer the same fate to if your not careful
BackOnMyBS, suffer?
SeeMinusMinus, “I would argue that masturbation is the human animal’s most important adaptation. The very cornerstone of our technological civilization. Our hands evolved to grip tools, all right—including our own. You see, thinkers, inventors, and scientists are usually geeks, and geeks have a harder time getting laid than anyone. Without the built-in sexual release valve provided by masturbation, it’s doubtful that early humans would have ever mastered the secrets of fire or discovered the wheel. And you can bet that Galileo, Newton, and Einstein never would have made their discoveries if they hadn’t first been able to clear their heads by slapping the salami (or “knocking a few protons off the old hydrogen atom”). The same goes for Marie Curie. Before she discovered radium, you can be certain she first discovered the little man in the canoe.” - Ernest Cline
NocturnalMorning, If this isn’t a joke (which i think it is), you have a very skewed sense of scientists. If it is a joke, then carry on my dude.
SeeMinusMinus, It is indeed a joke
pyrflie, The best jokes touch a deep truth. This one at least strokes the surface.
Send_me_nude_girls, Masturbation is an innovator. So many inventions go back to “because porn”. Take current AI development for example, there’s a massive drive because porn and porn has only one job.
sgbrain7, “The little man in the canoe” might be the best one I’ve heard yet
TheTetrapod, God, I fucking hate Ernest Cline.
pthaloblue, Reminds me of the Einstein jerk off skit from UCB
Ilovethebomb, Marie Curie had a husband though.
dubyakay, Had. And then she didn’t. Their marriage only lasted nine years.
eager_eagle, need a hand?
ShitOnABrick, (edited ) high five?
pete_the_cat, JIM!
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