memes

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tourist, in Loving this AI revolution so far
@tourist@lemmy.world avatar

And it’s never even a half decent bot.

“You double charged me this month”

“Hi! For problems relating to your wifi, please visit our FAQ.”

support bot has ended the chat

rustydrd,
@rustydrd@sh.itjust.works avatar

Followed by an automated email that reads “Would you like to participate in our customer survey? We are dedicated to improving the quality of our customer support! :D”

Patches,

I see you answered 0 out of 5 stars. Janice in Support (whom you’ve never spoken to) will now get put on a PIP.

toomanyjoints69,

I got fired because of a 1/5 star rating where in the comments of the feedback they said i did excellent and was nice but they hated “the damn robot before and after”

My boss said that it was still my responsibility and that if i took more ownership i wouldnt get fired from wherever i worked in the future. I asked him if he would reconsider firing me. He paused for an exceptionally long time and said no. I cried and he laughed in my face. When security walked me out they wouldnt let me keep my headphones that i had brought in and paid for with my own money.

Narrrz, in You also found them really attractive too

or we just eyed each other from afar, but not obviously enough for the other person to notice, and never found an excuse to make closer contact.

Dettweiler42, in I won’t download your stupid app

We don’t go to Ravenholm.

CptIceberg, in shut up

You can try to think of it as someone else and even give it a name.

  • You’re not good enough.
  • yeah yeah shut up Kevin isnt this past your bedtime ?
peopleproblems,

so like my therapist legit talked about that last appointment

now that I’ve seen you state it, I wonder if I should call the voice my ex.

Track_Shovel,
@Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net avatar

No. Don’t give them that much power

peopleproblems,

yeah I thought about that more after I posted. she still has too much power. when she/I move out, hopefully things get better

Maeve,

This is the right answer. But you can tell that voice, “sit down like I am. Improvement is a life-long project, with rest periods mandatory.”

Cano, (edited ) in shut up

Your life is worth EVERYTHING, you serve ALL purpose. You should love yourself NOW!

eldain, in What about insulator though

Any of them would be scary controlling train tickets, freaking wizards changing careers.

punkwalrus, in You also found them really attractive too
@punkwalrus@lemmy.world avatar

In high school, we had a science fiction club. I was vice president in my senior year. A year after I graduated, I was hanging out with some fellow graduates and one of them said, “How come you hated Christine so much?”

“Who?”

“Christine Smith. The blonde girl?”

“The blond girl who wore all those surfer shirts?”

“Yeah. Whats so bad about her?”

“Nothing. She was always so quiet. I barely remember her.”

“Yeah, well she practically threw herself at you, and you treated her like she didn’t exist.”

“She did?”

“Yeah. We even tried to make it easy. We set her up at parties to talk to you, and you just acted like she wasn’t even there. You were so rude.”

“I literally had no idea. I totally would have dated her.”

“Yeah, well, too late. She got so depressed after you graduated, that she ended up dropping out of everything and tried to kill herself. Shes been hospitalized and her parents moved away to be with her. Like, couldn’t you gave even said hi? Just because you made vice president of the club didn’t mean you were better than her or something.”

I literally had no idea.

Mobiuthuselah,

She didn’t get depressed because you didn’t talk to her, and she wasn’t interested in you because you were VP of the science fiction club in high school. It all just sounds so self important even if that’s not your intent.

DmMacniel,

And then everybody clapped, question mark?

Because if it were true, those colleagues were stupid AF not picking up that you weren’t picking up. Or that they tried to force the romance, clearly leading her into depression.

So I call BS, sorry.

moshtradamus666, in beepbeepbeep beeeeeeeepp!

What is this about?

Hubi,

The Soviet–Afghan War

Grayox,
@Grayox@lemmy.ml avatar

Rambo 3

GoodEye8, in shut up

All parent know this list is BS because the loudest sound is whatever wakes the baby.

EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted, in You also found them really attractive too
@EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Hell, I’m so socially inept that I interacted with girls in the past and then as they were leaving I was told that I did well at flirting with them, to which I responded with, “I was flirting?”

jasondj,

What is flirting but a good conversation with some complimenting and occasional teasing?

I really wish when I was younger people hadn’t put the title of “flirting” on having a fun conversation with people of the opposite sex, and put it on the checklist of getting a date. If people had just said “be yourself and try to have fun”, around all intersections (and not just as cheesy dating advice when talking about the opposite sex) I probably would’ve been a lot more successful in forming relationships in my teenage years.

EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted,
@EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Truth, friend. Truth.

Wrongleverkrunk, in Not all heroes wear capes

Laughs in top hour

Kecessa, (edited ) in Inspired by reading everyday news

If you want to be “accurate” middle age and now would be the same line (because the last millennia is about 0.33…% of homo sapien’s history) and bright future would be pretty fucking long because there’s at least a billion years ahead of us for life on Earth, probably more…

trolololol,

Oh I can see you don’t read news

Lol

Kecessa,

Humans aren’t the only beings living on this planet and other life forms will thrive long past the point where homo sapiens disappear.

Sharpiemarker,

because there’s at least a billion years ahead of us for life on Earth, probably more…

That’s optimistic. With record heat levels, it’s going to become uninhabitable for humans long before a billion years.

Kecessa,

That’s just humans though, plenty of life will go on living and they will probably be better off without a global apex predator in their way. That will be the true bright future for life on Earth. Maybe we’ll eventually manage to better ourselves and solve the climate problems we’re facing too, time will tell.

One thing though, some sections of the planet will become uninhabitable for humans, not all though. People have been living in the scorching heat of the desert for thousands of years, if the average summer temperature closer to the poles increases to 27 instead of 22, people will manage to survive there, worst case they’ll adopt a nomadic lifestyle again.

Jezebelley, in I won’t download your stupid app

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  • IHadTwoCows,

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  • Littleborat,

    Their app is such a pain though. Nofap challenge imposed by reddit. I am on day 30 already.

    jetsetdorito,

    I relapsed when I found out you can patch in your own key to still use third party apps 😬

    Littleborat,

    How do I patch my key into RiF?

    MaoWasRight,

    Can I use RIF?

    frostyfrog,

    You’ve got my attention. Lack of third party apps is what keeps me away…

    registrert,
    @registrert@lemmy.sambands.net avatar

    deleted_by_author

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  • orsetto,

    maybe the fediverse is a nice place, while the mainstream platforms are just for dopamine

    psmgx,

    dopamine

    This is a classy way of saying porn

    RVGamer06,

    Sure, but not only.

    RVGamer06,

    Exactly.

    JohnEdwa,

    I went from 100+ subs down to just 9, but some communities simply don’t exist in lemmy.

    Vespair,

    If you moderated a sub before the API ban and used the Boost app, then Boost still works for you. Thank god for my tiny sub.

    c0mbatbag3l,
    @c0mbatbag3l@lemmy.world avatar

    Most of the niche subs don’t have equivalents here.

    Sir_Fridge,

    Look if reddit has the most useful information on a google search then reddit it is. Doesn’t mean I’m actively browsing it.

    Dicska,

    I still start my search with site:reddit.com when looking for an answer. I just prefer opening the cached hits so that traffic doesn’t go to reddit but Google instead. Not like there weren’t problems with Google, but this is the closest I can get to “punishing” Reddit but also getting an answer to my question.

    jigsaw250,

    Yep, right now, using a search engine with Reddit in the query is still the best option to find an answer to something. Maybe Lemmy fits that in time, but until then, Reddit it is.

    Holzkohlen, in It be like that

    🎵Captain Jean Luc Picard of the USS Enterprise🎵

    Aurenkin,
    UnfortunateShort, in You also found them really attractive too

    I respect your optimism

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