clearedtoland,

I had the urge while out the other day and had to wipe, like a peasant. Bidets should be a right in the kingdom.

space_gecko,

Get a little portable bidet. They’re not ideal, but it sure beats the awful toilet paper in public bathrooms.

rockerface,

Wait, those exist? I might have to look into it, because I can’t install a normal bidet in my apartment (horrible Soviet era piping all over the place)

powerofm,

They’re basically a squishy water bottle… Not ideal but might be worth a try?

Duranie,

After the birth of my first child I ended up with a hemorrhoid. Truth be told, I was scared shitless to touch anything down there for a couple days after the trauma. They had given me a squishy bottle to rinse myself while everything recovered. Warm water from the tap was heavenly lol.

ElBarto, (edited )
@ElBarto@sh.itjust.works avatar

Just run a hose and connect one of these.

TrickDacy,
@TrickDacy@lemmy.world avatar

Are you saying the water supply to the tank is non standard? That’s the only piece you need to interact with. I’ve yet to see a non standard one

AtariDump,

CuloClean Portable Bidet for… www.amazon.com/dp/B07L448T4K?ref=FuckOff

Telcontar,

What is that ref at the end of the link?

Duranie,

LMAO - I haven’t seen anyone do that before. Everything after the ? is for site tracking info, so you can remove it. There was a post about it sometime in the last couple weeks that gave examples and where to chop it off to not offer more tracking info.

StorageAware,

I believe there is/was an extension that automatically changed the tracking parameters to that. Maybe it’s that.

WeirdGoesPro,
@WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Gonna need the name, dawg.

LillyPip,

My $35 bidet is awesome and just diverts water from the tank. It took less than 10 minutes to install: remove seat, place bidet, replace seat, unscrew tank water supply, screw in water splitting hose. You don’t even need to turn off the water, that’s how easy it is. It’s great for renters, too, because you’re not actually making any modifications, and it’s easy to remove with no trace.

Mine’s a Luxe, but there are several like it in the same price range.

Orbituary,
@Orbituary@lemmy.world avatar

They are the right and norm in Japan.

Stache_,

Idk about you guys, but I typically don’t watch other people wipe their ass lol

HipHoboHarold,

Don’t kink shame

MrVilliam,

What if kink shaming is my kink?

s_s,

I know an adult care nurse, she told me “everyone wipes their ass differently and they’re all convinced their way is the only way.”

Jknaraa,

Why would you want to watch that?

LemmyKnowsBest,

Bidet users are depraved kinksters

MystikIncarnate,

As someone with a bidet… Don’t tell them our secrets.

MegaUltraChicken,

We had them and then moved to a new place with solid metal lines going to the toilet so I couldn’t reinstall our bidets. I lived in luxury for years only to have it snatched away… Don’t take your bidet for granted people.

Passerby6497,

Does your toilet’s water line have connectors on either side, or is it just straight from the wall to the toilet? If the latter, you really need to talk to a plumber, but the former can be solved by just getting a new hose line.

rmuk,

I just do that dog thing where I hitch my legs up and use my arms to drag my ass down the hallway runner.

suodrazah,

It’s a life changing purchase.

dream_weasel,

Just wipe til the paper comes back red and you’re good.

Mongostein,
SoonaPaana,

Meanwhile 1000 generations of Indians stare at you disgusted by your over reliance on technology.

bravesilvernest,

“Technology” in this instance is “little nozzle pointed at bum” 🙃

djdadi,

Don’t forget the seat / water heater! And the butt-dryer

fosho,

heater and dryer not necessary or common

pingveno,

Dryers don’t work, from what I’ve heard.

GBU_28,

Sorry what’s the joke here? Big parts of India has issues with sanitation

SoonaPaana,

Sorry! Didnt mean to offend! Indians typically use their hands to wipe their butts with water. I think it is cleaner and uses less water relatively. The joke I intended to make was that India has been using water to wash themselves for several years whereas the west needed the invention of a bidet to force the change.

ikidd, (edited )
@ikidd@lemmy.world avatar

Its almost like westerners came up with the germ theory of disease tranamission and adjusted their sanitation methods to prevent it.

SoonaPaana, (edited )

I agree! But also both Hinduism and Islam had cleanliness rituals baked into their religion. Maybe they were able to notice historically that periodic bathing multiple times a day, helped them to avoid diseases!

Tartas1995,

Honestly humans are stupid and it is so interesting what we learned to do for sometimes awful reasons that turned out to be pretty good for us. I mean a lot of medicine was “getting the devil out of you” for a long time and it sometimes happened to work because people would just do random shit.

s_s,

Sino-Asian countries only drink hot drinks for similar reasons…

TheBat,
@TheBat@lemmy.world avatar

Middle class and up now have bum guns installed.

shopkohler.in/collections/…/deco-health-faucet

AstralPath,

“Wipers watching bidet users spray their nasty all over.” Two sides of the same coin if you ask me. The happy medium is the dry wipe followed by the wet wipe then another dry.

LillyPip,

It’s directed water, and goes straight into the bowl. There’s no ‘all over’ unless you’re doing it wrong.

Also, I hope you’re not flushing those wet wipes. They lie about being biodegradable and cause fatbergs in the sewer that workers have to go down and clear.

Stache_,

Do you reach down and dip the toilet paper into the water to get it wet?

AstralPath,

God no! lmao that’s almost as bad as that podcast guy that admitted he’d catch his own poop and gently drop it in the toilet so it doesn’t splash.

You can get plumbing-safe wet wipes (baby wipes, basically). They work perfectly well.

seathru,

plumbing-safe wet wipes

That’s usually a lie. But as long as it’s a rent house, it’s fine.

abir_vandergriff,

Oh yeah, definitely this. If it doesn’t break down in water, it won’t break down in the pipes.

Strawberry,

they also cause millions of dollars in damages by clogging large scale sewer lines

fossphi,

catch

What the actual fuck

TheRedSpade,

Oh, you haven’t seen it? I apologize in advance for ruining your day.

LordKitsuna,

There’s no such thing as flushable wet wipes. They might not clog your particular pipes but they do not break down in water. They can’t because then they wouldn’t be able to be wet. They contribute to massive clogs in the sewer systems that people have to go down and break up honestly it should be illegal to sell them

SnipingNinja,

It shouldn’t be illegal to sell wet wipes (I assume you meant the flushable variety), just make it illegal to flush it down

Strawberry,

it should probably be illegal to falsely advertise them as “flushable”

veroxii,

There’s no such thing as truly flushable wipes. They’re the bane of plumbers everywhere… Actually more the bane of people having to pay the plumber bill at some stage. A quick google will confirm this.

Think of it… To be flushable they need to disintegrate in water. But they’re wet wipes so they are always wet… Yet they’re not disintegrating. Wipes which disintegrate in water is just toilet paper.

fosho,

it’s kinda sad how close minded some folks are… so much so that they’ll convince themselves that flushing harmful waste is ok.

mypasswordis1234,
@mypasswordis1234@lemmy.world avatar

I always feel like somebody’s watching me

And I have no privacy…

cupcakezealot,
@cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

can’t believe david tennant’s husband was the head of one of the largest and most power vampires in the world and david tennant was a vampire expert.

Thcdenton,

Pff If it it’s extra funky I just spread my cheecks and do a good-morning in the shower

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/5cfb2fac-35cf-4909-a6f9-ca3bf4927a59.webm

Tremble,

Funny thing is during the time period of the folks dressed here…. They were dirty nasty and thought taking baths actually made you sick. These guys would have had shit encrusting there assholes in cookie cutter shapes like stars and hearts, and they would have smelled worse than a alcoholic who pissed themselves on the subway.

jdf038,

Not really. Bathing in the 17th century was more common than a lot of people realize. Check this link out for a historian that argues this in an article: frockflicks.com/the-gross-18th-century/

Rodeo,

“I bathe once a month, whether I need it or not.”

– Queen Victoria

The queen herself only bathed 12 times a year.

kosanovskiy,

As someone that had a fancy bidet and returned it my main selling point was “reduce tp” during covid. It just didn’t work with its fan blowing, I still had to use tp to dry my ass afterwards ans to thr people that say, “just use a towel” like wtf then you have a shit ass stinking towel next to you in the bathroom. Especially so since I wash my towels after a use. Point is the heated swat is goated, the wet ass and weat fan dry function is no and they aren’t for me. I will scape my ass with tp will Sahara dry.

Annoyed_Crabby,

The point of bidet is to clean your butthole, not reducing tp use. Even so, wipe away water is significantly easier and less tp use than wipe away any trace of poop.

maniclucky,

Well yeah, you have to pat dry. But you still get cleaner and use way less tp (this may vary on how much fiber you have in your diet).

KoboldCoterie,
@KoboldCoterie@pawb.social avatar

You wash your towels after a single use? Just so we’re clear, you’re supposed to wash yourself before you use the towel… they shouldn’t be that dirty… right?

scrubbles,
@scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech avatar

Yeah I don’t think they fully understand the steps to using a bidet if they’re worried about towels covered in shit…

Catoblepas,

Your towel is still going to have shit germs on it, you’re just not going to see them.

naeap,
@naeap@sopuli.xyz avatar

Just like your toothbrush and pretty much everything else
This stuff is everywhere…

But yeah, shit stained towels aren’t the way to go. And I sometimes don’t trust how clean I think I am…

Ataraxia,

Better be using soap. That’s why I just squat and rinse in the tubtap.

kosanovskiy,

Yeah you don’t? Likenyou shower daily, so you change towels daily. I have 7 towels for 7 days and wash them on Sunday. I like knowing that I am clean ans while myself with a clean towel after a clean shower.

JeeBaiChow,

Lol @people eating with the same hands they clean their assholes with.

Strawberry,

do you use your dominant hand to open doors

ExLisper,

You clean your ass with your second set of hands? Nice!

spaphy,

Dude wipes coming in clutch. Watch me clean my asshole all day long friends.

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