programmer_humor

This magazine is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

AVincentInSpace, in When you forget to set a boundary conditions in your logic

Maybe they meant your account is 915 days old as of this year?

Username,

I think that’s fairly obvious with the smaller text and context.

Sylvartas, in What you are according to you fav language

R is more"you are a researcher or an engineer and also a nerd"

Valmond,

Then C/C++ is You’re a smart nerd.

Let the flame wars begin!

Sylvartas,

As a professional C++ programmer I am compelled to agree

backhdlp, in This is what being a Redditor does to your life
@backhdlp@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Me when I don’t know at how many changes I should commit (the previous commit changed 2 characters):

QuazarOmega,

For real, or when you should make the first and second commit.
Or worse, when you’re too focused and start making a ton of changes, then you realize you haven’t committed anything. Discovering I can stage ranges has made me fall for this way too many times, because I think I’ll easily just go back and extract one atomic change at a time later (spoiler: it won’t be easy ( ; ´ Д `))

pkill,

as soon as you realize you can’t easily contain your commit message within a 50-character conventional message (or slightly more if you wand to be more specific about the scope)

BoastfulDaedra, in no.. just no

I haven’t been this pissed off since LINQ started allowing syntax switches in random-ass places.

GreatBlueHeron, in 4 billion if statements

I’m not a good reader - I skim most articles and often miss most of the meaning. I read, and enjoyed, every word of that!

librecat,

Thanks, I totally would’ve skipped it without this comment.

NovaPrime, in 4 billion if statements
@NovaPrime@lemmy.ml avatar

Andreas is a maniac

dylanTheDeveloper, in no.. just no
@dylanTheDeveloper@lemmy.world avatar

Omg that’s terrible! Link?

neuracnu, in It's that time of the year again!
@neuracnu@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

I was reading that to the tune of the chorus of The Distance by Cake. It worked until the last line.

Cwilliams,

Lol that actually works so well

agent_flounder, (edited ) in what's the difference?
@agent_flounder@lemmy.world avatar

That…isn’t quite right.

Git is a distributed version control system for software development^1.

Version control allows you to manage code versions and changes to code. You take snapshots, so to speak, of every change you make.

Distributed, in this context, means multiple developers can write code on each of their development computers and merge the changes, usually to a centralized git server.

GitHub runs a web-based git server at GitHub.com so teams can store their code in a central location on the internet.

  1. Ok, technically, even though It’s often used for software source code, it can be used for any set of files and directories.
kernelle,

If you read it as “a website providing a service, but that service is also available elsewhere” the analogy makes perfect sense.

kevincox, (edited )
@kevincox@lemmy.ml avatar

I don’t see anything you said that it isn’t quite right.

Porn is a distributed form of entertainment.

Porn allows you to get your rocks off. You take views, so to speak and do your thing.

Distributed, in this context, means multiple enjoyers can watch porn on each of their entertainment computers and share the videos, usually to a centralized porn server.

PornHub runs a web-based porn server at pornhub.com so viewers can store their porn in a central location on the internet.

agent_flounder,
@agent_flounder@lemmy.world avatar

So in the analogy porn corresponds to git? Or to source code?

spiderplant,

In this analogy it could be that:

  • the filesystem is git and the porn is source code
  • the file is git and the data is source code
  • you don’t consider the source code because you can host anything on github
  • we shouldn’t be reading into the analogy this deeply because its a silly analogy meant for absolute beginners
Rodeo,

Ok, now explain the part you think is not right.

agent_flounder,
@agent_flounder@lemmy.world avatar

Git is a tool. GitHub is one implementation of a git server. Git is used to manage source code. GitHub hosts / manages source code.

Porn is content. Pornhub is one service that hosts content. Porn is not a tool. Git isn’t content. Source code is content.

So porn isn’t really analogous to git.

Maybe a better analogy would be… Git is to GitHub as outlook mail client is to outlook server–or Gmail app to Gmail server.

Rootiest, (edited )
@Rootiest@lemmy.world avatar

GitHub runs a web-based git server at GitHub.org so teams can store their code in a central location on the internet.

Wait… it’s GitHub.org?

I always assumed it was GitHub.com…

Edit: GitHub.org only seems to support HTTP and then it just does a permanent redirect to GitHub.com

agent_flounder,
@agent_flounder@lemmy.world avatar

Ugh I’m an idiot. Thanks.

Rootiest,
@Rootiest@lemmy.world avatar

All good 😊 you had me going for a minute though

remotedev, in Need a rust version too.

Ruby: there is a built in method called free_the_princess()

CmdrKeen, (edited )
@CmdrKeen@lemmy.today avatar 

<span style="color:#323232;">require 'castle'
</span><span style="color:#323232;">
</span><span style="color:#323232;">begin
</span><span style="color:#323232;">  Castle.attack
</span><span style="color:#323232;">rescue Princess
</span><span style="color:#323232;">  puts "Done"
</span><span style="color:#323232;">end
</span>
karmiclychee,

On Castle, no less.

lemmesay, in Programmer tries to explain binary search to the police
@lemmesay@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

image transcription:

Afterwards I found a chatroom thread among Cambridge computer scientists, one of whom had also been told that unless he could pin down the moment of theft no one would look at the footage. He said he had tried to explain sorting algorithms to police - he was a computer scientist, after all. You don’t watch the whole thing, he said. You use a binary search. You fast forward to halfway, see if the bike is there and, if it is, zoom to three quarters of the way through. But if it wasn’t there at the halfway mark, you rewind to a quarter of the way through. It’s very quick. In fact, he had pointed out, if the CCTV footage stretched back to the dawn of humanity it would probably have only taken an hour to find the moment of theft. This argument didn’t go down well.

JPJones, in I'll just be a quick 3h

It’s OKAY to say no.

DinosaurSr,

I’ve gotta get better at this…

Smoogs, in Bill is a pro grammer

Wow the comments here sounds like you’re all a bunch of antisocial nightmares to deal with in rL.

frezik,

That would be the type of people attracted to programming, yes.

nailbar,

I consider myself social. I’m a programmer because I love making things, and because I’m lazy, and I hate doing repetitive tasks.

DontTreadOnBigfoot,
@DontTreadOnBigfoot@lemmy.world avatar

Welcome to Lemmy

drolex, in 10 months later bill revisits his spaghetti code. forgets absolutely everything and refuses to elaborate. this wouldn't have happened if Bill forgot to comment on his code

Wow this job has massive amounts of unnecessary stress, I wonder what the cause can be.

The cause is me, 6 months ago.

(Written for comedic purposes only. Managers are my single source of stress)

agent_flounder,
@agent_flounder@lemmy.world avatar

Me: writes code^1, doesn’t comment

Me, six months later: what idiot wrote this shit?!

  1. Only developer on project
drolex,

Time to plan a 3-day workshop with yourself at the pub to get it together

AlmightySnoo, (edited ) in ifn't
@AlmightySnoo@lemmy.world avatar

reminds me of #ifndef instead of #if !defined(…)

  • All
  • Subscribed
  • Moderated
  • Favorites
  • •
  • programmer_humor@programming.dev
  • localhost
  • All magazines
    •
    Loading…
    Loading the web debug toolbar…
    Attempt #