EvilEyedPanda

@EvilEyedPanda@lemmy.world

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EvilEyedPanda,

Dude I loved my Envy 2, played so much Tetris in the bathroom at work!

EvilEyedPanda,

The Adventures of Milo and Otis! I wonder if it is streaming anywhere?

EvilEyedPanda,

I’m an alcoholic stoner who works full time, so I’m inclined to agree!

EvilEyedPanda,

The best part of waking up, is your brother in your butt!

EvilEyedPanda,

Dump my body unceremoniously on the lawn of a billionaire.

EvilEyedPanda,

Surprisingly still more useful than being put in a box.

EvilEyedPanda,

Don’t look at me when you type like that!

EvilEyedPanda,

Genuinely why I miss my blackberry, I could type out a message while looking straight ahead

EvilEyedPanda,

OK, this genuinely made me laugh, thank you!

EvilEyedPanda, (edited )

“I was watching late night infomercials, when one came on and said ‘forget everything you know about slipcovers,’ so I did, and it was a load off my mind. And then they tried to sell me slipcovers but I didn’t know what the fuck they were”

~Mitch Hedburg

EvilEyedPanda,

Setting birds on fire and beating potatoes into pulp, just as our forefathers intended

EvilEyedPanda,

There’s so many young people, when the fuck did this happen, how old have I become?

EvilEyedPanda,

Those are the roots, you can tell where the sand use to be toward the top, and got washed away, and the roots kept growing, cuz like, life finds a way!

EvilEyedPanda,

Grab your tortoise and put on a little bit of spackle.

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