I didn’t exactly end my relationship, either, but it ended because of me. I’m mentally processing it. In my mind, I focus on all the reasons it didn’t work until my mind comes to terms with it being for the best.
It also helps to get involved in some new hobby, service/volunteer experience, or creative effort.
My go-to is always ice cream flavors. Simple enough for people to quickly make decisions, but also highly subjective.
Most other comments so far are misleading. You shouldn’t do “favorite” or “best” in forced ranking. It needs to be something that’s on a continuum and is subjective. Typically, you say “rank features in order of importance,” not “most important feature,” or “rank from most delicious to least delicious” rather than “favorite ice cream flavor.”
“Favorite” is a single data point, not a continuum. And it’s not subjective, since others don’t get an opinion on what someone else’s favorite is.
Sorry to hear you missed your flight. It sucks but hopefully it won’t ruin your plans.
As for the story:
It was 15 years ago, my parents, my two siblings, and me were about to travel to Canada to visit our aunt. For all of us, it was our first ever transatlantic flight. We were all so excited about it, that none of us could catch a bit of sleep the day before leaving.
It required 5h of travel to catch the plane in the capital, so we had to leave at like 4 am to be on time for it. But somehow we manage to do it and arrive on time at the airport.
Excitation is at its maximum, finally our big trip is around the corner. We go to the check in desk, cue for a good a hour, and once our turn come, get asked for our passport. We all look at my father that start frenetically look in his pockets, then handbags to find our passport. But no sign of them. He start sweating heavily, ask my mother if she kept them. No, not with her neither. Big panic moment, everybody shouting, undoing all the luggages in order to find them. But nothing. We forgot our passport. No way to catch the plane.
Our father go back to our place, 5h away from the airport, while we stayed in a hotel for the night. Turns out the passport were on my parent shelf. Just one story higher than were they always were. My mother being quite short did’t see them and assumed my father had them.
We went back to the airport on the next day to see what we could do to save our trip. We got lucky as we got access to another plane, for free, and got upgraded to first class as a bonus, due to 5 other passengers missing their flight ! But we had 5 mins to catch it. The run though the check-in, security, the terminal gates was quite epic to fathom !
The very first step is to know the fallacies. Find a list.
The second step is to familiarise yourself with them. Learn the fallacies. It can also be called sophism in some languages. Familiarising yourself with them will allow you to recognise them.
Third is to be vigilant during a conversation to detect them. Sometimes you will be the one to use them.
The easiest, and amont the most common, are fallacies tied to reputation: when you consider something right or wrong because of who made the statement. It’s sketchy because it can be used as a shortcut in conversation, but by itself the truth or wrongness of the argument doesn’t depend on who said it, never. But some people have demonstrated expertise or they habit of lying or manipulating. Other fallacies usually involve the language or the logic, so it’s harder to detect, but it’s a great mental exercise.
Note that a fallacy is a reasoning flaw; sometimes the goal might be to trick you, indeed. But sometimes it’s just a brainfart… or you might be dealing with something worse, like sheer irrationality. That said:
look for the conclusion. What is the point that the writer is delivering? (Note: you might find multiple conclusions. That’s OK.)
look at what’s being used to support that conclusion. What is the core argument?
look for the arguments used to feed premises into the core argument. Which are they?
Then try to formalise the arguments that you found into “premise 1, premise 2, conclusion” in your head or in a text editor. Are the premises solid? Do you actually agree with them? And do they actually lead into the conclusion? If something smells fishy, you probably got a fallacy.
Get used to at least a few “big” types of fallacies. There are lists across the internet, do read a few of them; you don’t need to memorise names, just to understand what is wrong with that fallacious reasoning. This pic has a few of them, I think that it’s good reference material, specially at the start:
In special I’ve noticed that a few types of fallacy are really common on the internet:
genetic fallacy - claiming that an argument is true or false because of its origin. Includes ad hominem, appeal to nature, appeal to authority, ad populum, etc.
red herring - bringing irrelevant shit up as if it supported the conclusion, when it doesn’t matter. In special, I see appeal to emotion (claiming that something is false/true because it makes you feel really bad/good) all the time.
oversimplification - disregarding key details that either stain the premises or show that they don’t necessarily lead to conclusion. False dichotomy (“if X is true, Y is false” in situations where both can be true or false) is a specially common type of oversimplification.
strawman - distortion of an opposing argument into a way that is easier to beat. Again, notice that “intention” doesn’t matter; only that the opposing argument isn’t being addressed.
moving goalposts - when you counter an argument, the person plops another in its place, without acknowledging that it’s a new argument. Often relies heavily on ad hoc (making stuff up on the spot to shield an argument)
four terms - exploiting multiple meanings associated with the same word to create an argument like “A is B¹, B² is C, thus A is C”.
There are also some “markers” that smell fallacy for me from a distance. You should not trust them (as they might be present where there’s no fallacy, or they might be absent even when the associated fallacy pops up); however, if you find those you should look for the associated fallacy:
“As a” at the start of a text - genetic fallacy, specially appeal to authority
"Trust me" - red herring, specially appeal to emotion (once you contradict the argument there’s a good chance that the other will create drama because you didn’t blindly trust them, so the whole thing boils down to “accept this as true otherwise you’ll hear my meltdown”).
“I don’t understand” followed by a counter-argument - strawman. Specially common in Reddit.
“Actually” - red herring through trivia that is completely irrelevant in the context.
I wouldn’t want to live in the Dragonball Z world.
Every time they fight the villain and destroy the world then use the dragon balls to wish everyone back to life would infuriate me to no end when they could have just wished the bad guy to stop existing/never existed/wasn’t fucking evil and not have anyone die in the first place.
“JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, GOKU! I’m so tired of dying every few months because you gotta fight some motherfucker! You know it hurts right? You’ve fucking died. You know!”
I think the lore was that the dragon can’t stop things that are stronger than itself. But I guess it e.g. could have broken the Sayans capsules so they would just choke in space ._.
Empathy and kindness all over, no countries,borders or nations exist, just humans. People and corps no longer powered by greed as much as these days, and general thinking of how to keep growing and do better as a species.
My brother returned from his train trip on Friday, he had looked up bus for yesterday but decided for 20 hour train ride.
This bus collide with another yesterday, 80 people injured 2 died. We joke all the time trains are late but for this to happen on rails multiple things has to go horribly wrong.
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