Imagine being the first one to use a fresh porta potty. No smell, other than that blue chemical water down at the bottom. It’s so damn clean.
“Great!” you exclaim with excitement. So you sit down on that smooth dry toilet seat and, relaxing, a tremendous donker just falls right out of you.
The mass is too great. The distance. The speed and acceleration. It isn’t even a second of time, but you know. You know.
GaTHUNK
A cold blue kiss races towards the moon. A moon so relaxed the single crater yawns beckoningly wide. The kiss forms into a dull spear, racing towards the darkened maw. It enters beyond the shadow. Fully into the heavenly body. Cold meets heat.
You yelp in shock. There is cold artificially blue water deep in your butthole. The sudden tension passes and as your muscles relax again, some of that cold drains back down to earth. A light shower.
You were looking forward to this festival all year and you spend the entire time distractedly thinking in shame about how something so fortuitous turned to disaster in moments. You didn’t bring a change of underwear. Why would you?
I mostly do everything on my phone and I’ve found cloudstream satisfies my needs with a surprisingly negligible amount of effort. Is there something very much like that but for audiobooks (and possibly ebooks)?
alt textMeme: Leonardo Dicaprio and Cillian Murphy in Inception. Top panel: Leonardo says “There’s a dog behind you.” Middle panel: Cillian says “What does he look like?” Behind him there’s a dog (perhaps a sighthound) with narrowed eyes. Bottom panel: Leonardo narrows his eyes.
My nephew joined the Marines, wanting to be in infantry. His recruiter spent months fixing his brain and convinced him to pursue avionics instead. Really smart kid and he’s finally understanding how he’s setting himself up well when he gets out. He’s still in B or C school or whatever it’s called.
I’ve been watching One Piece (the anime) for a couple of months now and, while I know that it’s shonen, watching the obviously badass female characters suddenly turn into sexy wimps is consistently disappointing.
Fun fact: Saturday morning flights out of New Orleans are the most missed flights in the United States. I was told this by a gate agent when my flight out on a Friday was cancelled due to weather.
“Just come really early tomorrow morning and you’ll get on that flight. They always have room because of that.”
Poseidon why (lemmy.world)
Cloudstream equivalent for audiobooks?
I mostly do everything on my phone and I’ve found cloudstream satisfies my needs with a surprisingly negligible amount of effort. Is there something very much like that but for audiobooks (and possibly ebooks)?
What are some small things we should change about the human body?
Ripping off a post I just saw in the Isaac Arthur subreddit. Imagining we work out the technical ability. Examples they suggested were:...
This is just cruel (startrek.website)
I've made a terrible mistake (startrek.website)
Dog (cdn.masto.host)
alt textMeme: Leonardo Dicaprio and Cillian Murphy in Inception. Top panel: Leonardo says “There’s a dog behind you.” Middle panel: Cillian says “What does he look like?” Behind him there’s a dog (perhaps a sighthound) with narrowed eyes. Bottom panel: Leonardo narrows his eyes.
start em young, i say. (mander.xyz)
Love hurts (lemmy.stuart.fun)
She legitimately said “he seemed well adjusted.” After telling me he looked a lot like me 15 years ago.
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but it's not happening (lemmy.world)
Difficult Terrain (lemmy.sdf.org)
The Netherlands (mander.xyz)
deleted_by_author
Roots of Mother Appalachia (mander.xyz)
cntraveler.com/…/appalachian-mountains-may-have-o…...
Sure Doesn't feel like one. (lemmy.ml)
What's your warp slogan? (lemmy.ca)
In light of what other’s have been memeing … it made me think....
Asking mathematicians about their proofs (sh.itjust.works)
Technically it's always the first in China until they get removed from the movie (startrek.website)
Lemmy, what are your "missed flight" stories?
I just missed mine. Feeling pretty stupid right now. Hopefully your stories will cheer me up.
People from the "hotter" regions, how do you deal with the heat?
I am from Eastern Europe and this is the hottest summer on my memory. For at least 3 consecutive years the heat is breaking all records....
What do you use Vaseline for?
I have a tub of Vaseline and have hardly scratched the surface. I’m curious whether anyone uses it for anything other than their lips.