phorq

@phorq@lemmy.ml

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phorq,

Missed opportunity to make that a gif that moves slightly…

phorq,

Thanks! You’re hot too, dawg!

phorq,

The file extension is exe, am I doing something wrong?

phorq,

The problem is that they actually don’t mean that. And truthfully I don’t mind the idea of paying for video hosting, that shit’s expensive, but YouTube is going about it in the worst way possible.

phorq,

F*****x, I edged so hard I chromed all over myself…

phorq,

It’s always Sunny in Alabama

phorq,

He didn’t leave the matrix yet?

phorq,

I don’t believe you, do you have video evidence of this?

phorq,

You forgot to take into account leap years or as I’ve come to call them the leaping gnu/years

phorq,

The cow says “meow this guy knows his memes!”

phorq, (edited )

Well sure, but if you think about the fact that there are 8.1 billion people in the world and then consider that if you’re really lucky you might live to 100… That’s (365 × 100) × (60k ÷ 8.1b) × (100%)… You only have a 27% chance of dying this way… Honestly didn’t expect it to be that high.

phorq,

I doubt my math is correct, I always sucked at statistics, but if you were to convert my previous nonsense you wouldn’t multiply by 365 since you already have the yearly rate rather than the daily rate so it would be: (100) × (500 ÷ 333,287,557) × (100%) = 0.015%

phorq,

Proceeds to eat all the fish and do a surprisingly sophisticated double-backwards-somersault through a hoop whilst whistling the ‘Star Spangled Banner’ as thanks before leaving dolphin man behind on earth…

phorq,

Is it wrong for me to say that the pessimism with a side of alcohol is the most British you could possibly describe being merry?

phorq,

PlayStation Zero is better than Diet PlayStation and it’s still 0 calories (assuming you don’t try to eat it…)

phorq,

Is this that “alchemy” thing I’ve heard so much about?

phorq,

Does skydiving without a parachute count as a jumpscare? Because I feel like there’s not much to fear except death in that situation…

phorq,

If everyone sucks at driving, odds are that you do too (I’m not excluding myself from this). Most people just don’t realize it. But yes some people are more stupid than others…

phorq,

Chef Boyardeez arms tired from opening all those cans…

phorq,

Why am I getting Bobobo vibes? There better not be an epic battle of ass hair vs pubic hair happening just outside…

phorq,

It’s only dissociative if the identities aren’t getting along.

phorq,

Dude made a fortune on merch, I see red shirts and grey hoodies all the time

phorq,

Chupa… can you imagine that being a kids movie?

phorq,

According to the questionable celebrity health statistics website I found… Danny DeVito is 70kg, which is 11 stone… So it’s more like the chef lost almost 1.9 Danny DeVitos. We Americans may have weird measuring systems, but we take them seriously!

phorq,

Do you have a problem? If yes, then it should consume your thoughts so you don’t have any ability to think of a solution… If no, then you must’ve forgotten something…

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