There are 6 people who’ve had gay sex that I could find and all but one of them are bi (or at least bi-curious). That seems like a statistical anomaly.
It’s a 90s high school, somewhat rural and religious, according to the article. Either there really were few homosexual relationships there, or the students didn’t want to reveal them.
I think people feel liberated to say they’re gay these days, so there are much more people claiming to be gay than in previous decades. On the other hand, there’s still a lot of homophobes and also quite some biphobes around, so there’s probably a lot of bi people that present as hetero or even gay.
I’d assume that most people are at least a little bi, and that they’ll try that out in high school even if they later decide they won’t pursue it.
I’m a 90s kid, with a stepsister the same age (who grew up in a Massachusetts college town, at that). When I was in college, I dropped my then boyfriend’s ex’s name in a conversation with my dad and stepsister (he was out already and didn’t make a secret of anything, he was cool with it, I swear). My stepsister asked all shocked if I knew he was bi when we started dating and then explained that she’d never date a bi guy, because she could never “be sure”. My dad made a boomery joke and said something noncommittally biphobic.
I’m so grateful I had that conversation before I came out to my family. I’m bi and an afab egg. I just married a bi man, and I told him pretty early on that I don’t know what the situation with my gender is yet. His response was “that’s why we date bi people, we like all the situations,” which had never occurred to me (sometimes I’m dumb), but it was a perfect level of humor and acceptance for the moment.
I’m sorry, this was a super long and mostly irrelevant comment. I intended to agree that biphobia is present in the people and places you’d least expect, even when straight up homophobia isn’t (stepsister was a member of the gsa and loved pride parades)
I’m like 90% sure I’m a trans dude, but I’m not quite there yet (I’m immigrating and in grad school and just don’t have the time or security rn to do a deep self analysis, plus I think I’d be a much less attractive man. I know that’s less important for men, but it feels like I’d be shooting myself in the foot. Also, my husband loves how I smell and taking hormones might change it to something he didn’t like as much, which I would hate). Therefore, I haven’t hatched yet.
He is not saying anything about it being weird there are gay or bisexual relationships. Just that every instance of a homosexual relationship is also bisexual.
Like its interesting there are no purely homosexual relationships as you would expect from an accurate sampling
That’s why this was interesting to me. I myself am bi and that has not been my experience. Most gay men I encounter are fully gay, and I’ve only ever met 2 other bi people in my life.
Are they fully gay, or did they embrace the acceptance of a biphobic culture by leaning into their gay side?
I’m not devaluing their choices, I’m just saying that people sometimes shut doors out of choice, not because there’s no world in which they’d take them.
They’re probably in touch with their emotions and express them in a healthy way and aren’t afraid of intimacy outside of sex and romantic relationships
Of course! But in my experience it’s not really the norm, highschool is a very dramatic, hormony place, and I’d be willing to bet that blue dot was more likely just the school “dreamboat” which kids of that Age tend to find more desirable than emotional maturity
I had 5 or 6, and if you count kissing a lot more. By now I’ve had several more and if you count kissing I’ve completely lost count.
For reference, I’m not particularly attractive and I’m right on the border of normie but not quite. I think my weird friends think I’m a normie and my normie friends think I’m a nerd.
There were guys I went to high school with who had far, far more sex than I ever did. More than I was even interested in because they’d sleep with just about anyone who was willing at any party.
By 12th grade, some of the “cool kids” I went to school with probably had 10-15+ sexual partners under their belt.
I left school at 16 with exactly one person to put on a graph like this.
My first two relationships were like 5 years long in total. After the second break-up things accelerated a lot, but in school I think my situation was pretty standard.
I “dated” a classmate for a month at 14 until he wanted me to sit on his lap and I broke up with him because I felt like I’d be too heavy but didn’t want to admit that, so I didn’t know how to talk to him about it.
If you’d asked me at 14, if he was a romantic partner, on god I’d have said yes.
I kept looking at that too. It's crazy to me that there are only 2 cycles in the graph and one is the big accidental one. It honestly makes me think that either something must be wrong with the data, or it's reflective of some deep principle of math or sexuality (e.g. that people won't fuck around within their close social grouping nearly as readily as they will with people on the outskirts of it).
The authors wrote that they were surprised too and went back to talk to the students and apparently there was an unwritten rule that you don’t date the ex of the new partner of your ex. So if Bob and Alice split up and Alice starts dating Ben, then Bob should not date Ben’s ex Alison.
This is actually very interresting. I always found it hard to understand how some people can have so many sexual partners, and then there are people with very few of sexual partners. I had this theory that there must be some subculture of people who are really into this, date eachother in this group which causes their number to increase abnormally. It was just a silly theory but this sort of supports it?
If you look at this a little closer, you’ll notice that there aren’t actually that many highly connected nodes.
The big structure is mostly composed of single link chains.
Elsewhere it was mentioned that the researchers were also surprised by that, and did followup interviews that revealed that it was against social rules to date your exes partners ex. Basically two couples can’t “swap” partners. I thought it was interesting that you didn’t see that, but you do see a few triangles.
And that’s even more interesting. As someone who was not part of any of the graph in high school / college, how would a big link of chains play out in real time?
Like “The Mary and Tom met at a party. Next week Tom stumbled into Lucy by the lockers…”
Up until very recently most housing in Finland was co-ops, and it’s still extremely common although many new developments are built and owned by corporations which then rent them out.
I live and own shares in a new housing co-op (proportional to the size of my apartment), and all of us together own and run the building and we’re renting the property from the city (although you can buy your share of that property off from the city if you don’t want to pay that rent.) It’s not a perfect system by any means but it’s better than corporations owning everything; ideally the people who live in a building are the ones who decide how it’s run, but of course that’s sort of gone out the window too with rich people just buying properties speculatively and to rent them out. If enough of the shareholders in a building are rent-seekers, upkeep of the building is going to go way down because they don’t live there themselves and don’t give a shit about whether it’s a nice place to live in, they care about making a profit.
Corporations don’t have to be about making tons of money. They can be about organizing people to accomplish things that they couldn’t individually. You then make money just to give those people a living wage and keeping the lights on.
This doesn’t even need to have a legal framework. Just a couple of people who agree to take up certain tasks is a company.
Fine but they shouldn’t be considered as people, lobbying should be illegal, fines can’t just be part of the business plan, money is not free speech, and if a corp is caught doing illegal activities it should go to jail or be broken up like the rest of us.
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