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Glemek, in Survive the zombie apocalypse

Crossbow, respirator, fire axe, water purifier.

Crossbow can reuse ammunition as long as you can find your bolts, and improvising shitty bolts is simpler than anyvother ranged weapon.

If zombie plague is airborne, full mask respirator is gonna be essential.

Fire axe is a decent survival and breaching tool, not really considering it a weapon.

Water purifier essential so you don’t die of dysentery, or if the zombie plague is waterborne.

GBU_28,

If it’s airborne you’re toast, you gotta remove it eventually

Glemek,

It being airborne doesn’t mean its in all air everywhere all the time.

GBU_28,

Right but you don’t know the patterns, incredibly variable. Taking the mask to win on that condition is a total dice roll

Glemek,

Its a contingency, but if you need it, you really need it. I think I’d otherwise be fine with the other 3. My next choices are probably tent, body armor, first aid kit, flashlight, then NVGs.

A tent would be useful, but tents are super common, I can probably loot one from somewhere. My current neck of the woods it wouldn’t really be necessary though.

Body armor might help if I get surprised by one or two zombies and let me get away, but I reeeeally don’t want to be in melee with zombies. Even with body armor that could easily be a loss, especially if its not just one or two.

First aid kit is useful, but unless a tourniquet can prevent zombification, its mostly gonna be for mundane stuff, blisters, scrapes, strains, and sprains. They are also commonly available and should be lootable. If not, most of its contents are probably improvise-able.

Flashlight, genuinely useful but probably lootable, reliant on electricity, probably draws unwanted attention.

NVGs, are cool and probably slightly useful. Going on the offensive against either zombies or other survivors is not in my game plan, I guess they could help hunt.

All these seem to be somewhat limited in their utility. Whereas the respirator is either vital, or a light encumberance.

Smokeydope, in No nut November is finally over but...
@Smokeydope@lemmy.world avatar

Whoever came up with don’t dump December is trying to get people to win the darwin award: impaction edition. Sounds like a psyops cooked up over at 4chan

gibmiser,

What’s funny is I thought I came up with it then Googled it and, of course someone else had already done it.

Smokeydope, (edited ) in Survive the zombie apocalypse
@Smokeydope@lemmy.world avatar

Water purifier - clean water is essential

Fire Axe - for fire wood collection as well as wood based structures for shelter and defense. Also it is a decent weapon that takes relatively little skill to effectively wield.

German Shepard - loyal and lethal companionship, living thinking alarm bell, will instinctively assist in protection/attacking, could be trained to track game. Will gladly accept food scraps, the bones and flesh of my enemies, and pets as payment for services rendered.

Body armor - reduces risk of infection through scratches to body as well as mild protection against various weapons. Also an added insulative thermal layer for the cold. Body plate can be replaced with old thinkpads as needed

blahsay, in Survive the zombie apocalypse

The only correct answer here is:

  • Jeep (mobility, storage and sleeping). Also height for scouting/shooting
  • Machete - very useful for close combat and as a survival tool if you know how
  • Ak47 (assuming ammo also provided). Excellent weapon, great range, stopping power and reliability, decent accuracy.
  • Night vision - if you’ve used these you know they provide an immense tactical advantage and can act as a flashlight too.

All the rest are superfluous or easily buildable by yourself (eg water filter)

Kecessa,

After 500km the Jeep is useless for mobility

blahsay,

Siphon petrol. Any tube will work for instance the wiper tube

Kecessa, (edited )

Ok then, six months max if you always manage to find gas (you’re not the only one around siphoning it)

blahsay,

Why? There’s effectively infinite cars and gas tanks are sealed.

I think an ev/solar setup would be better though. Use the jeep to find a house with solar and a battery then all you need is an ev and you’re laughing

Kecessa,

Gas doesn’t keep, it turns to varnish, that’s why starting a weed eater after winter is a pain, the carb is clogged from old gas turning to schmoo

Ookami38,

Nothing lasts forever. The utility you get short term from having transportation able to haul more than just yourself is IMMENSE for getting established.

GBU_28,

If you are in a highly populated area, without a support group, a 500km drive may be just the ticket to get to a safer location.

You may also be shot up driving around, but we don’t know the details

lightnsfw,

Why not just take the vehicle you’re siphoning from then if they’re available?

Ookami38,

For as much shit as they get, jeeps are designed to be more rugged than most cars. Probably trade it on once you find an actually rugged vehicle, but it’ll be a better choice than most cars you’d find, i imagine.

GiddyGap,

The only item here that will be remotely useful longterm is the machete. All the other items will run out of gas, ammo, and battery quickly.

MycoBro,

An axe is more useful than a machete.

GiddyGap,

Sure. But they didn’t pick an axe, they picked a machete.

JimVanDeventer, in Wretched souls

But… I like potato salad.

*feels forehead

Nooooooooooooo!

bdonvr, in Anon does a little trolling

deleted_by_author

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  • Rolder,

    Isn’t the idea that he saw it by looking over the guys shoulder? Not on the site itself

    bdonvr, (edited )

    lmao I’m dumb thanks

    Potatos_are_not_friends,

    Just typical greentext BS-ing.

    Also the stories they make are equally strange and incredibly specific for no reason.

    Mouselemming, in Dog

    Fwiw, Weiner dogs can be pretty ferocious

    768, in Survive the zombie apocalypse

    Why AK-47? 7.62 × 39 mm would be kinda hard to loot for this audience.

    Ookami38,

    Curious what you mean, as 7.62x39 is about as common where I am as any other caliber.

    768,

    I’m basing my assumption off of C:DDA, which plays in New England and there it apparently is fucking rare.

    Ookami38,

    Ahhh, yeah I’m in southeast USA, so it’s all everywhere lol

    blackdeth, in Bad day

    I am laughing way too much at this comment section 🤣

    Fuck_u_spez_, in Future You

    Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can’t free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you’ve broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.

    cows_are_underrated,

    This reminds me of the “Durchfall Mann” Cartoon. Watch at your own risk: youtu.be/ql53nYa6Tlc?si=tM9VLNdbxDr6dC0h

    skulblaka,
    @skulblaka@kbin.social avatar

    This has a very similar energy to the cuil decay copypasta

    HeyThisIsntTheYMCA,
    @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

    Stop reading my diary

    eager_eagle,
    @eager_eagle@lemmy.world avatar

    sounds fake. No way Facebook still has 5M active users.

    EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted, in Survive the zombie apocalypse
    @EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar
    • Armor, provided it comes with a helmet & is bite-/scratch-resistant
    • Doggo, because sensing danger is important & loneliness would almost be a bigger killer than zombies,
    • Machete, as a tool & method of defense
    • Water purifier, provided it doesn’t require an outlet of some kind
    _TheThunderWolf_,

    And then scavenge around a city, getting an axe, a flashlight, a first aid kit, a bicycle (not motorbike because fuel), a survival kit (matches/flint, compass, etc.) and some survival guidebooks such as general survival guide or foraging guide. Now you’re all set for making a shelter in the woods and staying away from everything, making occasional trips to the city for supplies. Maybe you’ll even manage to make a kinda comfy home up a tree or something.

    EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted,
    @EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

    Forgot about the first aid kit. Good point. In this new world, antibiotics and even basic sterilization supplies would be more valuable than gold.

    troglodytis, in Two years in a row!

    Gogo gadget plexamp

    brianrlawson, in Survive the zombie apocalypse
    @brianrlawson@midwest.social avatar

    Fast zombies or slow zombies?

    Smokeydope, in yes you too
    @Smokeydope@lemmy.world avatar

    POV: you’ve just done DMT and stared at a clock

    HipsterTenZero, in Survive the zombie apocalypse
    @HipsterTenZero@dormi.zone avatar

    dog x4, ez

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