I’ve gotten back better at it. First you’ve got to recognize the situation and the then you’ll need to stop and enjoy it. As a kid you had plenty of time to enjoy feelings, but as an adult you have to take your time to do it.
Eh, not sure if enjoyment is the right word. But it’s nice.
I started with running this year and it was awful and painful. But after I passed a certain threshold I realized it’s no longer painful, I could just hold the pace and run like forever.
Now it’s sort of relaxing experience where I can just let loose my brain and think about whatever I want for like half an hour. Which is nice when you’re an adult with no time for yourself
How to achieve this - I don’t even know myself how I made it. I got one of those Garmin watches for birthday and there was this Coach feature, I just followed it and after like 4 months I was able to run 12 km
We had a big flood where I live about 10 years ago. Massive amounts of water and whole basements of almost all the homes completely went under water for days. I worked for a clean up crew that summer cleaning up alot of the damage. I was 18 and needed a job and thought it would be a good experience. I was just hired as a temp by a restoration company through a hiring agency though and I found out almost everyone I was working with was the same. The people supervising us, some were not much older than me and had no idea how to run this operation. One day we are in the basement of a large commercial building. Young supervisor tells me and 3 other temps to haul out a heavy washing machine that needs to go to the main level. Only way out was a massive wood staircase that went straight up and contained probably 50 steps. This was an industrial washing machine so it weighed probably a couple hundred pounds. We get it onto a dolly and begin hauling it up the stairs. I am at the top pulling the dolly with another guy while the two others are at the bottom pushing. Thing is so heavy we have to pull it in spurts. So “1…2…3…” then we all move it up one step. We get all the way to the top and only have two more steps. Now remember when I said these basements were fully under water? That was also the case here. The staircase had been under water for days and was now very weak. So we pull the machine up to the step before the landing. As we pull it, me and the guy beside me step onto the landing. The machine goes onto the last step and the connection between the staircase and the landing at the top of the stairs breaks. Whole staircase falls and the two guys below fall with it. Luckily when it all hits the ground, the machine rolls away from the guys and they are hurt, but not seriously. Everyone comes rushing over because the sound is deafening, and me and the other guy are still standing at the top of the landing looking down at everyone. Had we not stepped onto the landing at the moment we did, we would have fallen with the stairs and the machine would have rolled ontop of us. Likely killing or permanently injuring us. It’s amazing how close I was to likely death. We were pulled aside by the safety guy for the crew. I saw him later reaming out the young guy that was supervising us and told us to take the machine up the stairs. I’m pretty sure he was fired that day and he looked so distraught. In hindsight I don’t blame him as he should never have been in that position and it was more a reflection on the bad business practices of the restoration company hiring temps and unqualified supervisors.
Firstly I just want to say that this is really interesting post and I love that you've asked this question. Secondly, as someone who experienced child abuse I don't know where to even start in answering this question because as an adult I'm now in a space where I can actually feel my feelings and express them safely.
I think life is maybe similar to being in a long term relationship. There are times when every little thing life does annoys you or times where it's just eh and you realise you need to actively spice things up. And then there are times when you are completely overcome by joy thinking about how much you love life, how much you've been through together, and how excited you are to spend the rest of your lives together.
If you're looking for a suggestion on spicing things up I highly recommended jumping into some existential philosophy. It's like the intellectual equivalent of a roller coaster I guess.
Bitwarden checks all the boxes. I’ve had great experience with it. bitwarden.com
I will say, auto-fill on load is a bad idea. On desktop I keep my auto-fill bound to a key so it doesn’t actually end up in fields it shouldn’t be.
2FA is locked behind the $10/year premium if that’s something you wanted, but beyond that the free plan has everything 99% of people will use. They do third party security audits, have public white papers, and is completely open source.
Get a Yubikey that supports Webauthn and FIDO2. It’s the future of two-factor authentication on the web. At work we use the YubiKey 5C Nano, but I think the entire Yubikey 5 series supports Webauthn.
Bitwarden only autofills if the page’s URL is the same as the account in your vault. So it actually helps you make sure that you aren’t putting your info into a phishing site or something
although, I’m pretty sure autofill is disabled by default anyway?
Bitwarden only autofills if the page’s URL is the same as the account in your vault. So it actually helps you make sure that you aren’t putting your info into a phishing site or something
This is true, though wasn’t my concern. My concern is that it (and other PW managers ofc) can sometimes fill in fields its not supposed to, and you end up accidentally including a username or password in a GET header.
although, I’m pretty sure autofill is disabled by default anyway?
I’ll just mention my own experience. I struggled with depression and/or anxiety for basically my entire life from as early as I can remember and I definitely didn’t have the kinds of joyful childhood experiences you describe. However now that I’m older and my anxiety is being properly treated (medication) I’ve definitely had more / stronger feelings of joy with simple experiences. All this is to say that I think it might be a depression thing, not a age thing.
It’s a quote for a horrible 90s indie film that’s always struck with me for some reason. My social group and I have since taken this quote as an absolute/truism that gets referenced whenever a situation calls for absolute certainty. Because as we all know, there’s no room on Mars for limp dicks.
Backstory: I met my first girlfriend when I was around 17. Then I met her family, and during that time, O developed arthritis.
The pains were really bad, to the point that some days I couldn’t even stand up from my bed. One day, her parents called me and asked me if they could “help” me.
This is where the story starts, they said they were part of a “religious group” and were called Santeros (so they practiced Santeria).
The thing is, at the time I was so ignorant that I didn’t even know what that was and didn’t even make the effort to find out for some reason.
They told me they could take me to a guy that could pray for my health and whatnot. Since I didn’t want to sound rude, I agreed and we went to the place.
The man (priest? Idk) kept insisting he knew I had noghtmares and I was afraid of someone chasing me, to which I kept insisting that that was not the case. Yhe whole experience was weird.
But then he told my girlfriend’s parents that he wanted to see me again because he meeded to “perform” to be able to help me with his prayers.
For some reason, I didn’t even pay attention to this and just said sure.
A week goes by and I am going, again, to the same place with priest with my gf’s parents. The difference is that, this time, there is a giant box in the back of the car.
I get there and they take me to the second floor of thr place. The floor is completely messed up woth dirt all over the place and weird artifacts, cockroaches, spiders, and a hole on the rooftop.
They tell me to take my clothes off (except my underwear) and pray to a god (I think it was called Oshun? I don’t remember).
After chanting and praying, they tell me to lay down on the ground looking up. I do so and they proceed to take a small calf out of the box, decapitate and dismember it next to me, and afterwards putting the body in top of me in the form of a cross, all while chanting, singing, dancing, etc.
After that they told me to bathe in a specific river using oranges as a sponge.
The whole experience was fucking surreal, after that, I just reject almost everything that has to do with religion.
It certainly helped me stay away from the family after that! The family told me “your belief was not strong enough, that’s why it didn’t cure your arthritis”. Sure…
Venezuela, where I was born (although I don’t live there anymore). However, there were way more Santeria small sacrifices (chickens) in Miami, FL when I used to live there, walking by the streets and actually looking at the bushes next to the streets you realize it’s really common, every now and then you find a bloody plastic bag with a beheaded chicken/rooster and hanging chicken legs.
Unironically this. I’m always itching for Vim keybinds now. I have a plugin for Firefox and DBeaver. I even got Vim keybinds and modals in my terminal lol nothing is safe.
When I was a pre-teen and teenager, pop-punk and emo were popular.
Turns out I haven’t outgrown this genre. I now listen to more music from a variety of different genres and time periods, but ultimately, 80% of my library is still early 2000’s pop punk.
Formalwear for when it is hot outside. Like a summer wedding or something. It’s always fuckin miserable going to those kind of events sweating the whole time
Normalise Roman style tunics. The whole thing is just a rectangle with a slit (for the neck) and sewing (for the sides), with two optional sleeves, and fastened to the waist with a belt, it doesn’t get simpler than that.
Also undyed clothes becoming a thing. What’s wrong with raw colours?
I was carrying some HVAC equipment down some stairs last year when I accidentally slip a little and the equipment cut my wrist wide open and blood started rushing out like crazy and my hand went numb instant. I immediately put pressure on my wrist to stop the bleeding and my brother drove me to the hospital. That ride there was so intense, I genuinely felt like i might bleed to death, or even have to lose my hand. It was so surreal, I kept thinking how horrible my family, friends, and my girlfriend of 5 years would feel if I died. In that moment I realized they’re what matters. My job didn’t matter, my social media accounts didn’t matter, my materialistic items I owned didn’t matter. Just the people who I love. After arriving the doctors did a great job at assuring me I’d be fine. I had surgery 2 days later, however, I couldn’t move my wrist or hands for a while. Even now, about 14 months later, half my hand still feels mostly numb all the time, it’s super sensitive, the scar is massive and hasn’t fully healed, and I can’t close my pinky finger no matter how hard I try. It definitely sucked a lot, mostly because I was in between jobs because I had was moving, so I couldn’t work and my girlfriend had to cover so much expenses and guilt took over me like crazy and I felt so worthless. Then I felt even worse cause it caused me to gain so much weight, I even started feeling suicidal for a bit. I’ve learned to accept it though and my life is pretty much back to normal. I wasn’t able to do so many simple things like wear pants with buttons, tie my shoes, using toilet paper was a struggle, driving was hard, locking my door was almost impossible because I needed my other hand to pull my door to get it to lock. Late last year I got a job in a retail store and have since gotten 2 promotions and making the most money I’ve ever made in my life. Around that time I also started eating healthier and I’m down 60 pounds! I’m glad I beat the suicidal thoughts and kept going. Life is awesome.
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