Is it normal for a person to "feel" less as they get older?

I remember experiencing the world much more vividly when I was a little boy.

I would step outside on an autumn evening and feel joy as the cool breeze rustled the leaves and caressed my skin. In the summers, I would listen to the orchestra of insects buzzing around me. I would waddle out of the cold swimming pool and the most wonderful shiver would cascade out of me as I peed in the bathroom. In the winters, I would get mesmerized by the simple sound of my boots crunching the snow under me.

These were not experiences that I actively sought out. They just happened. I did not need to stop to smell the figurative roses, the roses themselves would stop me in my tracks.

As I got older, I started feeling less and less and thinking more and more.

I’ve tried meditation, recreation, vacation, resignation, and medication. Some of these things have helped but I am still left wondering… is this a side effect of getting older? Or is there something wrong with me?

SynopticVision,

That’s exactly why we do drugs

Drop_All_Users,

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/b597c5df-07a1-4d38-adca-b2caee146e32.png

dditty,

'cause ya never know when your gonna go!

HobbitFoot,

Yeah, it is normal, but it also sounds like depression.

SlowNoPoPo,

Do shrooms that feeling will come right back

UnverifiedAPK,

Reach ego death and that feeling will go away forever.

doom_and_gloom,
@doom_and_gloom@lemmy.ml avatar

Not always true. But usually worth a shot.

systemglitch,

Even that wears off youngling.

z500,
@z500@startrek.website avatar

For me it was gay sex that did it

Llewellyn,
@Llewellyn@lemmy.ml avatar

Oh you

Notyou,

I was going to suggest that, but wanted to see if any other people would. It has helped me anecdotally, and many other people. There are studies being done at universities that prove psilocybin help with mental and behavior issues.

Obviously don’t just take my word for it. Look into it. Have a trip sitter or someone experienced that can talk you through your thoughts if you need it.

SlowNoPoPo,

yeah, as long as you treat the experience with the respect it deserves it’s beneficial, people get into trouble with it when they mix it with other drugs or just take it with no considerations

karce,
@karce@wizanons.dev avatar

100% agree with this. Ever since getting into shrooms the world has become so much more alive and I feel far better about life in general. I run a community for magic and mysticism if anyone is interested called !magic which focuses on this type of discussion. Anyone is welcome to join the discussion or ask questions.

Zarxrax,

It’s kind of the opposite for me. Like many people said, when you are young, every experience mostly feels new. However, when everything feels new to you, there’s really nothing special about it. For me, I always embraced the familiar. I look back at my memories of family vacations with disappointment, because as everyone else was wanting to go and do fun things, I was complaining about how I would rather be watching TV or playing my gameboy. Now as an adult, I understand how precious our experiences can be. I look out at a mountain and I appreciate the beauty of it. I think about the history that has taken place around it. I think about how other people might have experienced it. I get so much more from it than I ever would have as a child.

UdeRecife,
@UdeRecife@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

Same here. It simply comes from within. Everything now is so special because I’m aware how fleeting everything is.

Thanks for your comment. It resonated a lot with my experience.

CeruleanRuin,
@CeruleanRuin@lemmy.one avatar

I can only speak from personal experience, but I feel much the same way you do. However, novelty still does it for me. And I think that’s the explanation for the gradual drop-off. When you’re young, everything is new. By the time you’re older, you’ve seen it all, and so those little spikes of novelty are few and far between.

Ranjeliq,
@Ranjeliq@programming.dev avatar

I understand what you mean, I have the same feeling - everything is a but less vivid now.

I am no expert, but my guess that is happening because you have much more experience with the world now. As we age, the number of things that will be completely new to us becomes smaller and smaller. We just have more experience, and even if we haven’t seen/felt/heard something particular, chances are, that your brain still won’t be completely surprised - it will be able to find some experiences that you have which are close to that new thing.

But when you are a kid - there is a whole world of things you didn’t experience at all or didn’t experience enough to understand fully. That’s why everything was so vivid - there was a lot of “truly” new experiences.

1draw4u,

I recently read that in a neurotypical human being, the succession of two experiences only has a big impact on brain activity for the first experience, while the second makes a smaller spike. In psychotic patients on the other hand, the impression makes two equally large spikes both times. In the experiment, the experience was hearing a ballpoint pen click. So maybe being dulled to former experience is important for the brain to function properly, just a side effect of our natural brain filter.

MothBookkeeper,

That’s sad, but comforting in a way.

kender242,
@kender242@lemmy.world avatar

The prefrontal lobe is the part of your brain responsible for saying “hush”

i.e. that’s not a novel idea/stimulus anymore

jandar_fett,

This makes a lot of sense to me. I am trying to link it to survival and evolution, but can’t pin anything down off the top of my head. I’m going to continue mulling it over though.

danie10,
@danie10@lemmy.ml avatar

Well firstly your senses do start dulling (eyesight, hearing), and secondly you have way more context on the world itself (the mortgage bond, climate change, pollution, family responsibilities, social media trolls, the fragility of bones and life, etc). So I suppose your brain is less focussed on the moment, and you’ve got a bit cynical about life ;-)

I accept that the way I looked at life and moments at 15, 25 and 50 are fairly different. Decisions I took at 25 were right for me then, but today I would have decided differently, but then I would not be where I am today either.

the_third,

Short comment because mobile: You’ve described a thing I’ve been thinking about and grasping to get back since maybe two or three years. Thank you.

Hiru,
@Hiru@lemmy.world avatar

Man, I don’t know, but this post was beautifully crafted, you sir are a poet.

bstix,

I’ve gotten back better at it. First you’ve got to recognize the situation and the then you’ll need to stop and enjoy it. As a kid you had plenty of time to enjoy feelings, but as an adult you have to take your time to do it.

Nonameuser678,
@Nonameuser678@kbin.social avatar

Firstly I just want to say that this is really interesting post and I love that you've asked this question. Secondly, as someone who experienced child abuse I don't know where to even start in answering this question because as an adult I'm now in a space where I can actually feel my feelings and express them safely.

I think life is maybe similar to being in a long term relationship. There are times when every little thing life does annoys you or times where it's just eh and you realise you need to actively spice things up. And then there are times when you are completely overcome by joy thinking about how much you love life, how much you've been through together, and how excited you are to spend the rest of your lives together.

If you're looking for a suggestion on spicing things up I highly recommended jumping into some existential philosophy. It's like the intellectual equivalent of a roller coaster I guess.

InfiniteVariables,

Just go eat a bunch of psilocybin and report back OP

Lmaydev,

LSD connects parts of your brain that you haven’t used or haven’t been connected together since childhood.

Now while this doesn’t always lead to good experiences it cured my severe depression for around 12 months. I woke up feeling generally happy for the first time in a decade.

Luckily these chemicals are gradually being legalized for study and should lead to some amazing therapeutic applications.

ingy,
@ingy@lemmy.ml avatar

This is the way.

unwillingsomnambulist,

Objective unclear, ate penicillin and created a bacterium capable of speech.

On a more serious note…I gotta find some psilocybin.

JusnJusn,

I’d advise against suggesting that people should take psychedelics honestly. I know some people who have had their depression cured with psychedelics, and others who have come away from trips traumatized and scarred by false realities that their brains made up. It’s a strange thing.

festus,

I’ll just mention my own experience. I struggled with depression and/or anxiety for basically my entire life from as early as I can remember and I definitely didn’t have the kinds of joyful childhood experiences you describe. However now that I’m older and my anxiety is being properly treated (medication) I’ve definitely had more / stronger feelings of joy with simple experiences. All this is to say that I think it might be a depression thing, not a age thing.

floofloof,

I had come to the same conclusion, that I could never feel again like I did when I was a kid, that adult life was just inherently drab and lacking in feeling. But meditation did help, so I wouldn’t rule that out if you could work it into your routine for a while.

What kind of meditation did you try? I found the simple kind most helpful: just to sit and pay attention to breathing and whatever comes along, and don’t pursue thoughts once I notice them. It helped me with what you describe. I had basically decided that life turned grey when you became an adult, and all the thrill of experience was left behind in my youth. Through meditation I discovered I could still experience like I did when I was a kid, if I could experience without immediately going off into thinking about it. But I did meditate for a while before this started emerging. I never found the guided meditations or envisioning meditations to be particularly helpful, just sitting attending to ordinary experience.

I can’t speak to whether you’re clinically depressed and need some other help, but it might be worth continuing with the meditation alongside whatever else you try. I had given up on antidepressants too but eventually found a kind that worked. Now I continue the meditation but also take antidepressants when things take a real downturn. I hope you find something that helps.

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