Hi - I don’t know if this will work for you but I joined a local volunteer firehall which helped get me out of the house 2 hours a week for practice and I met some new people, some w kids. Of course I discussed it w my wife who understood. It’s been a wise choice.
I had to look up what a fire hall is and didn’t realize it was even called something else (fire department where I am). I was kind of picturing a Valhalla type banquet hall with a lot of barbeque
Whale Watching is our favorite. Bandit and Chilli are hungover from a new years party but they still have to parent. That’s how the first two years of parenting felt for us due to the lack of sleep.
Lol. We got the pull up diapers for our 2 year old. They tear, so they pull up but tear to take off. I think they are called pamper 360 or something like that.
I feel this. My wife was mostly on bed rest toward the end of her second pregnancy. We also have a toddler. I was basically taking care of our toddler, our two dogs, and the upkeep/cleaning of our house all on my own. Plus working a full time, very stressful job that pays most of our bills. The stress was real. And I was exhausted.
Keep your head up. But just know that after a C-section your wife won’t be able to do any heavy lifting, driving, and other things for at least 6 weeks afterward. If you have family or friends that you are able to reach out to, it could be good to do so. I don’t necessarily mean having people hang around your house all day. No one wants that. But maybe people can drop off some hot meals for you? Deliver groceries to you? Simple things that can save you a lot of time.
At the end of the day, and as much as your wife needs the help, remember to take some time for yourself. I found myself getting unreasonably frustrated at times, and I internalized that a lot. We can’t be good fathers and husbands if we are drowning.
Keep reaching out here if you need to vent or need advice!
Yeah same boat this is kid number 2 so I’ve been wrangling the toddler and juggling everything else. For whatever reason this pregnancy was way tougher on her. Instead of bed rest towards the end she’s just been dead tired by 6pm the whole time. Feel bad too because I spend all this effort on the house and the other kid but compared to the first pregnancy I’ve had zero time to be like “do you need water? Foot rub? Run to the store for that weird food?”
I remember with the first one I was like okay were in the hospital were good now. After a week long induction and a c section I quickly realized “oh shit there’s a lot of ways she can die right now”
Then the kid was out and I was like great now we’re good. Nope is it blind? Is it deaf? Why is this test weird
But I digress, the end is in sight and i know not to panic at those things this time. Fortunately (or unfortunately) I just got laid off and my state does paid leave now. So after today I atleast don’t have to worry about work and I’m not trying to cram everything into that couple hours at the end of the night
At the end of the day, and as much as your wife needs the help, remember to take some time for yourself. I found myself getting unreasonably frustrated at times, and I internalized that a lot. We can’t be good fathers and husbands if we are drowning.
Thanks for the reminder. Wife’s nausea is way worse with this baby than the last (who is now a very busy 1 year old). There are a lot of days where I feel like I’m stretched to the limit and I know I’m grumpy a lot more than I should be. I’ve got to get better at self care.
compressed work weeks are typically pretty successful. Either 4 x 10s for labour jobs. Pilot projects for office staff working 4 days a week, no extra hours for the same salary have been really successful too.
Took a 4-day weekend down in the states (Ocean Shores WA) then zoomed back on Sunday to attend a fathers day bbq in Vancouver. No gifts, but I'm itching to hit Home Depot and buy some unnecessary tools.
Mine was rainy and gloomy. Our daycare lady has COVID, but my wife and I can't afford to miss work this week, so we unfortunately spent most of Father's Day driving my daughter two hours to stay with her grandparents. Not the greatest Father's Day for me, but no doubt a fantastic one for the grandfather.
She's been helping him paint the living room. Pretty good for a three-year-old.
Was staying at a cabin with my wife and kid. We went hiking. Was literally 5 foot into the hike... Wife fell and hurt her knee pretty bad because she landed on a large sharp rock. Went straight to urgent care for staples and stitches.... 😂 But she's tough and we actually took the kiddo to the lake and I got in the freezing cold water and swam because the kiddo insisted. Ate some Korean bulgogi style tacos for dinner and I got a Father's Day shirt.
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