This would be the day that I die. And it comes out with some serious force like Katy Perry getting absolutely blasted to the floor? But the person who opens it is some old mayor or something. My entire life would have a point.
Here’s a list of everything inside the time capsule:
<span style="color:#323232;">Movies, including Home Alone and Back to the Future on VHS
</span><span style="color:#323232;">CDs, including Please Hammer, Don’t Hurt ’Em by MC Hammer and Michael Jackson's Dangerous album
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A Nintendo Game Boy
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Rollerblades
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Reebok Pump sneakers
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A jar of Gak, at the request of a Dr. Emmett Brown impersonator, who showed up in a real DeLorean and fake hair
</span><span style="color:#323232;">One of Joey Lawrence’s “Whoa! ’92” hats, which he stopped by to present
</span><span style="color:#323232;">News reports, including coverage of the AIDS crisis, Desert Storm, and the end of the Soviet Union
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Books, including a world atlas, history book, comic book, phone book, the Orlando TV Guide for the week of April 30, 1992, and a copy of the Book of Endangered Species
</span><span style="color:#323232;">An issue of Nickelodeon magazine
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A Nicktoons t-shirt featuring Ren & Stimpy
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A piece of the Berlin Wall
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A Barbie doll
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Pencils
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A skateboard
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A baseball
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Twinkies
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A stick of bubble gum (though no one seems to know which kind)
</span><span style="color:#323232;">Photos of things too big (or alive) to fit inside, including bicycles, planes, trains, cars, politicians and celebrities
</span><span style="color:#323232;">A videotape, which was a recording of the live ceremony, shot by a girl named Vicky who stood onstage to operate the Kid Cam
</span><span style="color:#323232;">The camera recording the tape, which appears to have been unplanned—Mike O’Malley and Joey Lawrence both looked baffled about how to remove the tape from the camera, so the whole setup was tossed in at the last minute
</span>
I know we’re only a bit over halfway there, but it’s weird and slightly disappointing how a good portion of those things haven’t changed much. As if they expected the change from 1992 to 2042 to be as drastic as the change from 1942 to 1992.
Bet those sneakers will sell for a fortune, if they don’t land in a museum
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