memes

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samus12345, in Just give me about 10%
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar
AngryCommieKender,

Best Morticia

SHOW_ME_YOUR_ASSHOLE,

This movie played at a bar I visited recently and it made me realize why I like BDSM.

eezeebee, in Aaaaaand it's over
@eezeebee@lemmy.ca avatar

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out they talk on the phone like this

sbv,

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out they talk on the phone

over_clox,

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out they’re a real living human being.

kn33,

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out they talk on the phone

OsrsNeedsF2P,

Imagine meeting the love of your life

Sabre363,

Imagine love

Stamets,
@Stamets@lemmy.world avatar
kibiz0r,

Imagine there’s no rest of the sentence. Then who was phone???

WhiskyTangoFoxtrot, (edited )

Oh my god bear was phone! How can that be?

Evil_Shrubbery,

Whaaat is love??

Palerider,
@Palerider@feddit.uk avatar

Baby don’t hurt me…

Evil_Shrubbery,

Don’t hurt me, no more

Todesschnitzel,

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out she breathes.

agent_flounder,
@agent_flounder@lemmy.world avatar

Red flag!!!

Downcount,

Imagine meeting the phone of your love and then finding out they talk on their live like this

over_clox, (edited )

Imagine meeting the phone of your dreams and caressing it lovingly and leaking bodily fluids…

Evil_Shrubbery,

That’s how you get a bloated battery STD …

over_clox,

Damn, that reminds me, I should replace my own battery soon. How do you replace human batteries though? 🤔

Evil_Shrubbery,

Idk, I’ve been running on emergency auxiliary power, even diverting power from life support, for years now. Lights are getting dimmer now.

Obviously I lack a built-in charging capability, so taking the batteries out just means shutting down before replacing them with new ones.

But others are suggesting cocaine. It supposedly boosts you lithium ions (I assume), and also postpones the memory effect of, em, li-ion batteries.

over_clox, (edited )

If you’re running on auxiliary power, you should eat the phone by now and conserve your calories. Make sure to boil your urine though. Stay safe, if you need assistance you can always call [redacted].

/s

eezeebee,
@eezeebee@lemmy.ca avatar

This voids the warranty, unfortunately

dangblingus,

God I wish. I hate having novel length text conversations. Texting for one off quick or cute sentences. Telephone for detailed conversation.

helenslunch,
@helenslunch@feddit.nl avatar

Voice messages live somewhere in the middle there.

MIDItheKID,

My voice mailbox is full and a refuse to empty it. If you want to leave me a message, send me a text.

helenslunch,
@helenslunch@feddit.nl avatar

Voice message, not voicemail. It’s like a text message but with your voice.

MIDItheKID,

Ahhh those. Yeah I’m fine with those. Text me the voicemail lol

Kusimulkku,

I’m not sure why but I dislike voice messages. Either text or just call

helenslunch,
@helenslunch@feddit.nl avatar

Yeah I’m not typing out a long ass text message.

Kusimulkku,

Then you should call because I’m not listening to your voice message

helenslunch,
@helenslunch@feddit.nl avatar

No you should listen to my voice message because I’m not calling 😀

Kusimulkku,

I’m sorry but not happening, hope it wasn’t important

Evil_Shrubbery,

Meet the love of your life and then imagine taking

Matriks404, in Shut. The fuck. Up.

I’ve never seen anyone doing that, who the hell are you people friends with?

PM_ME_YOUR_ZOD_RUNES, in Shut. The fuck. Up.

My 8 year old does this. Most of the time it’s during movies I’ve already watched so I could answer her questions. But fuck man, just watch the movie and it will answer your questions. We spend more time talking about what’s happening than watching/listening 🤦

rowrowrowyourboat,

Maybe she just wants to talk to you. For her, the movie experience is spending time with you.

PM_ME_YOUR_ZOD_RUNES,

We usually do end up talking for most of the movie. I guess I kind of do like doing that with her. I absolutely love your comment. Thank you for changing my perspective.

deweydecibel, in Hey Buddy

You can slot Grindr in there, if you like. Put it between consoling a child and picking a fight.

SHOW_ME_YOUR_ASSHOLE, in Just give me about 10%

When I had to do physical therapy for a lower back issue, they strapped me into a machine that wrapped around my hips and my ribcage and pulled them in opposite directions.

LordOfTheChia,

Did you confess?

SHOW_ME_YOUR_ASSHOLE,

It felt so good that I would have admitted to anything.

jballs,
@jballs@sh.itjust.works avatar

That sounds fantastic, Mr. SHOW_ME_YOUR_ASSHOLE.

SHOW_ME_YOUR_ASSHOLE,

It definitely felt nice and got quite a few pops from my lumbar spine.

Kiosade, in Shut. The fuck. Up.

Every time I see this skull mask character I laugh, he just looks so stupid!

HonoraryMancunian,

Who even is he?

Starkstruck,

according to tumblr, he is peak babygirl

Kiosade,

I think he’s from a COD game, but i’m not entirely sure.

LordCirais,

He’s Ghost.

LazaroFilm, (edited ) in Just give me about 10%
@LazaroFilm@lemmy.world avatar

Oh! I really need this! Too bad I can’t afford it. It costs an arm and a leg.

LemmyInRedditSux,

What? You hoping for a discount? This thing costs TWO arms and TWO legs.

Perfide, in This is for (almost) all of you

Ew, no.

RIP_Cheems,
@RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world avatar

Join us

howsetheraven, in This is for (almost) all of you

Or…no.

moistclump, in There is an endless supply

Never stop posting, Picard

The_Picard_Maneuver,
@The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world avatar
CheeryLBottom,
AVincentInSpace, (edited )
CheeryLBottom,

Ahhh, well, I’m trying to post the Nick Frost Yeah, boy meme haha

The_Picard_Maneuver,
@The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world avatar

Haha, I saw the URL in one of the attempts, I got you.

tipicaldik, in Shut. The fuck. Up.

Devils advocate here, because this sounds like my wife and I. She gets really annoyed at me, but she doesn’t understand that I don’t expect her to answer my questions. I just need to let them out of my head so I can concentrate on the rest of the movie. What she could do is either just ignore me, or agree that it’s a valid question and let it go. On some occasions, I may ask a question because I feel I may have missed something that she might have caught, but usually the questions are more rhetorical in nature…

TheBlue22,

Same here with my girlfriend, except we both do it, even though I might a bit more sometimes.

Azzu,

I don’t think the reasons are really important, there’s no “devil’s advocate” to play here. If it’s annoying then it’s annoying, it takes someone out of the experience, even if you didn’t intend it that way. That doesn’t really get changed by understanding the mechanics behind it.

tipicaldik,

I’m just offering another perspective, that’s all… Feel free to ignore me like my wife learned to do.

Azzu, (edited )

The additional perspective was interesting, I was just talking about the “devil’s advocate” part. One uses that expression if you want to actually argue for something. But there’s no arguing to be done, you can’t argue someone out of being annoyed. If you had just shared the explanation I wouldn’t have said anything, just appreciated it :)

Anticorp,

It sounds like you should explain that to your wife.

tipicaldik,

I have… we’re good. 33 years good.

Anticorp,

Gratz!

ericatty,

If you are in a relationship and that is your dynamic and you are happy with it, you do you. As long as you aren’t annoying other people.

My husband likes to ask questions during movies and shows. I had to talk with him on boundaries.

I don’t like to talk in movie theaters. People paid good money to enjoy the experience, including us. Screams, gasps, etc are fine. Reading subtitles to vision impaired people is fine. Dissecting what has happened to whom is not. We are there specifically to have questions posed and then answered by the movie itself, not by people in the audience. We can tear apart the flaws on the way home.

At home, it’s different, we can usually pause it, and I don’t mind as much discussing in real time. Unless it is clear it is about to be answered if you just watch for another minute. Then the answer is “just wait” and boom, story happens.

SexyTimeSasquatch, in Haha, I'm in danger

Well you should probably just do the dishes instead of making memes about it.

balderdash9,
schmidtster,

You brought some joy to a potentially infinite number of people. The dishes bring joy to only a select few.

7

AncientFutureNow, (edited ) in Two Party System. Why.

Only one part wants to eliminate me, a trans person. Only one party is self proclaimed terrorists. Only one party is endorsed by the KKK.

Adramis, (edited )

People: But they aren’t perfect!

Me (trans): But…I want to live tho

People: But gaza!!!

Me: It is literally illegal for trans minors to get any gender dysphoria treatment in my state and they’re drafting bills for adult bans, please help me (and also Republicans would’ve gone even harder supporting Israel)

People: BoTh SiDeS!!!

Shadywack,
@Shadywack@lemmy.world avatar

That’s still pretty sad, the only upside here is that one party doesn’t actively hate you. Neither gives a fuck though. It’s still a shitty choice and the point of the meme.

someguy3, in Just give me about 10%

Little more. Oo right there. Too much!

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