memes

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Smoogs, in Watch out, he's a pro.

My favorite is when they ask for help and then interrupt you to tell you you’re wrong

sviper, in Aaaaaand it's over

Well my first impression was that this person is looking over a ocean view while talking over phone which i totally can relate as I would do to not disturb the peace.

poke, in Just give me about 10%

Mr. Incredible would agree.

RobertOwnageJunior,

Multilayered!

roguetrick, in They're not equivalent

Man we're all fucking old people here aren't we.

AstridWipenaugh, (edited )

No sir. This thread is about emoji, not GILFs.

wewbull,

Those are the protagonists in The Dark Crystal, right?

AstridWipenaugh,

A muppet movie about GILFs instead of Gelflings would be significantly different 😂

at_an_angle,

I do love MILFS. Can’t lie.

mrbaby,

Yeah maybe somebody can help me here. Is it 🤣 or 😂 the one that kids make fun of us for using?

sigmaklimgrindset,

Both, grandpa. Now let’s get you to bed.

mrbaby,

Oh… oh no… 8:30pm and i am in bed :(

DragonOracleIX,

I’m not even 30 yet. I’m not ready to be calling myself old. D:

octoperson,

You’re not old unless you type smileys with a nose :-D

SkyeStarfall,

No, it’s more that :) and 🙂 give different vibes. I literally use both because of that lmao.

deadsenator,
@deadsenator@lemmy.ca avatar

:-/

fiah,
@fiah@discuss.tchncs.de avatar

(•_•)

intensely_human,

:P

techietechtecherson,

^(O_O)^

ChlorineAddict, (edited )

<(‘’<) <( ‘’ )> (>‘_’)>

wewbull,

(⁠╯⁠°⁠□⁠°⁠)⁠╯⁠︵⁠ ⁠┻⁠━⁠┻

gandalf_der_12te,

these are the ghosts from Super Mario.

PhreakyByNature,

Well, back in 19-dickety-2, I used to wear an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time.

Imgonnatrythis,

It’s making a comeback except now the kids are using shallots.

Anticorp,

Of course they are. Always opting for the more expensive options, these kids.

edgemaster72, (edited )
@edgemaster72@lemmy.world avatar

Now, to take the ferry costs a nickel, and in those days nickels had pictures of bumblebees on them. “Give me five bees for a quarter,” you’d say. Now, where were we?

gandalf_der_12te,

Ferry costs a bee.

intensely_human,

Back when a dime bag used to cost a dime!

SatansMaggotyCumFart,

I used to get free cocaine in my soda.

JimBeann, in They're not equivalent

We use an older version of Outlook at work and it turns :) into 🙂 but not the emoji but the Wingdings smiley which is the letter J when you use a different font. I only found out after months when somebody asked me why I put so many J’s in my mails.

I don’t remember asking you a god damn thing Outlook 🤨

ReveredOxygen,
@ReveredOxygen@sh.itjust.works avatar

…who thought that was a good idea

MildPudding,

holy crap, is that where all the Js come from?

mrbaby,

When i was about 10 i sent an email to my uncle that said “K cool 🙂” with the wingding smile.

His client rendered it “K cool J” and he made fun of my “jive”

Never sent an email using multiple or nonstandard typefaces again. I guess it was a good lesson, but it’s one of those hyper cringe core memories.

rosymind,

That’s cure. You must have really liked that person :)

JimBeann,

I guess I did J

Anticorp,

If there’s a bad decision that can be made, the Outlook development team made it. It’s a real shame that the industry standard is a hot garbage fire of a program.

Buddahriffic,

I’ve had to re-disable auto correct options multiple times in outlook. I’m perfectly fine capitalizing my own letters because sometimes I type code snippets in emails and don’t want those being treated as if they are sentences that need grammar and spelling corrections. I don’t need your fucking angled quotes either.

Red or green underlines to say you think there’s a problem are ok. Changing what I’m typing without me telling you to is not.

Anticorp,

Mac OS has autocorrect enabled by default on the entire operating system. Why TF would I want that when I’m typing with a full-sized physical keyboard? It’s especially annoying when you’re typing code. So yeah, I disabled all that crap within a couple of minutes. It’s super annoying.

Bluefalcon, in It's going

Life has a way of breaking some people. Take it one day at a time.

TimewornTraveler, in It's going

So it goes.

Siethron, in It's going

The most traumatic situation of your entire life… so far

ICastFist, in Aaaaaand it's over
@ICastFist@programming.dev avatar

Could be worse, they could speak into the part you stick to your ear

dustyData, (edited )

The clever part is that most phones do have a microphone at the top nearby the earpiece. The stupid part is that that mic is for noise canceling the ambient noise. So the phone is hearing them, but the person at the other end of the line is getting a distorted and full of artifacts voice that is barely comprehensible.

dustyData, in Hopefully we find something

Unrelated, this meme always reminds me of the story of that one drug addict who stole a friend’s phone to sell it to buy drugs. And when the friend in distress tells them they lost their phone, they help him look for it. It’s hilarious and sad at the same time.

spj, in Hopefully we find something
notTheCat, in This is for (almost) all of you

PFPs are bloat

Psythik, in Why does this happen?

Twice the time at half the power solves most microwave heating issues.

doctorn,
@doctorn@r.nf avatar

A misconception about microwaves is that they need around 1000W to actually do something, anything lower than 800 makes the waves completely ineffective. When you turn your microwave to 500W, what it actually does is lie to you while microwaving only half of the time instead by cycling on and off. You can usually hear this change in the sound it makes cause it will switch between the 1kW and the ventilator. 🙂

DeusHircus,

Pretty sure everyone knows that the power setting on the microwave just changes the duty cycle of the magnetron. I’ve never seen a microwave specify wattage when selecting power, usually 1-10 or 1-100, no lies involved. What it does is allows the heat more time to evenly distribute through your food while cooking with the same amount of energy. That super hot bowl and tepid soup won’t have as much of a difference when it takes twice as long to cook. Hot spots don’t get a chance to get as hot. Psychologically it’s easier too because let’s be honest, no one’s waiting 5 minutes after that timer goes off for the heat to settle

AncientFutureNow, (edited ) in Two Party System. Why.

Only one part wants to eliminate me, a trans person. Only one party is self proclaimed terrorists. Only one party is endorsed by the KKK.

Adramis, (edited )

People: But they aren’t perfect!

Me (trans): But…I want to live tho

People: But gaza!!!

Me: It is literally illegal for trans minors to get any gender dysphoria treatment in my state and they’re drafting bills for adult bans, please help me (and also Republicans would’ve gone even harder supporting Israel)

People: BoTh SiDeS!!!

Shadywack,
@Shadywack@lemmy.world avatar

That’s still pretty sad, the only upside here is that one party doesn’t actively hate you. Neither gives a fuck though. It’s still a shitty choice and the point of the meme.

Resol, in They're not equivalent
@Resol@lemmy.world avatar

3(

Try turning this into an emoji, Apple. Oh wait, you can’t, because I made it up. (Idea may be thought of by someone else before)

bingbong,

😗🍑

Resol,
@Resol@lemmy.world avatar

You’re the first person I know that kisses fruits before consumption.

friendlymessage,

Ü

Resol,
@Resol@lemmy.world avatar

Ich spreche kein Deutsch.

friendlymessage,

Ö

DosDude,
@DosDude@retrolemmy.com avatar

Ah. The old butt kissing emoji. I remember that

Resol,
@Resol@lemmy.world avatar

It was meant to be some kaomoji version of two eyes closed with a frown (I have little knowledge about kaomoji), but I actually like your description way more.

Sotuanduso,

😔

Resol,
@Resol@lemmy.world avatar

The mouth doesn’t look like it should. But it’s close enough.

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