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random_character_a, 1 year ago (edited 1 year ago) to lemmyshitpost in * scroll *

*After decades of using a computer accidentally presses the middle mouse button for the first time.

“What’s happening! It’s moving by it self. I broke it”

“What? Scroll wheel it a button? How can it be a button and why is it doing this.”

“Press it again? But I lost the spot. How do I get back”

“But it’s so far away”

*Does it again

“Now it’s doing it again. What do I do now. I can’t read this”

“Why is this. Is this a virus? Is my computer hijacked?”

“Did you do this?”

*Door slams

random_character_a, 1 year ago (edited 1 year ago) to lemmyshitpost in Burning the calories

If 70+ are posting in lemmy I’m really surprised.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Seymour Cocks

Kant was killed in line of duty and now fights crime as cybernetic police officer for the OCP

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Cats

“Your hand smells like greasy poo-poo”

-Cat

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Monogamy

Is this Chistina Aguilera in her latin prostotute phase 6 months after promising her father she’ll keep it classy?

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in How I cannot be worry??

Yes, I’m lazy and surrounded by even lazier deadbeats.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Webcam repairman

This particularly store was in a shopping mall and the toilet was a shopping malls free public toilet.

…and we don’t have homeless.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Just do it.

Those people would just eat the note, complain there was no beer with it and tell me that I’m a dumbass.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Merry christmas you weirdos

Without the text I would have guessed that it’s a somekind of sextoy that I don’t understand.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Watching mouths fill up with towels

Slap on instruction to swallow hole with plenty of water and sell them to old people as food supplement that helps joint pain.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Not everyone can live up to such high standards...

It’s me!

I was born as unsocial piece of shit. It’s not damage, if you were made that way. It’s a feature.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Existentialist Spagett

Good god man. You are talking about universal Armageddon.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Oh yeah

This and I’d like to see a slight incline on the toilet seat towards the backrest.

Seat better be heated.

random_character_a, 1 year ago (edited 11 months ago) to lemmyshitpost in Very basic expectations

We only boil tap water when there is somekind of technical emergency and there is a chance that water quality is compromised.

Normally we drink directly from the tap. National limit for maximum bacterial spore count is 100x less than international limit for bottled water.

With some exeptions tap water is in most places pumped ground water.

random_character_a, 1 year ago to lemmyshitpost in Check mate atheists

Random mutations are the least potent source of change in evolutionary mechanisms. So much so that some experts don’t even consider them as one.

Reinforcement of already existing traits through variation between individuals under environmental preasure is the main mechanism. (i.e. when food sources are high, individuals with longest reach are the fittest).