saltnotsugar

@saltnotsugar@lemm.ee

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saltnotsugar,

Møø

saltnotsugar,

In the kitchen it hums with delight,

A mischievous microwave, quite a sight.

With a twist of its dial, a dance begins,

Uneven warmth, where chaos wins.

saltnotsugar,

Due to Newtons 46th law of awesomeness, Ninjas are still cooler than spikes, but still are pretty dang cool.

saltnotsugar,

The problem is they they’re just designed to eat and get chonky. If they had invested in cool ninja combat during evolution, scientists believe they would be not only more likely to survive, but be a lot cooler.

saltnotsugar,

Batussy

saltnotsugar,

Rizzo’s discount burial shredding! You dead ‘em, we shred ‘em.

saltnotsugar,

When I die fire me out of a freakin cannon into the sun.

saltnotsugar,

“Hey router, I’d like to talk to-“

(Throws packet to the ground) YOU WILL TALK ONLY IF I WILL IT.

saltnotsugar,

“Four score and seven years ago…what’s happing to me!?”

saltnotsugar,

For some reason I always read hemoglobin as hemo-goblin. I watched Lord of the Rings too much.

saltnotsugar,

This guy is all set to rock out with his cock out.

saltnotsugar,

Any time the power goes out some person needs to say “Wooooah” with mild alarm.

saltnotsugar,

Let me fix this small issue right quick…oh…oh dear.

saltnotsugar,

Grow fast, chomp hard.

saltnotsugar,

Scissor me timbers!

saltnotsugar,

A candy bar that taste so amazing that it haunts your dreams, but you can never find it in a store ever again.

saltnotsugar,

Those slaps were rather gentle, with a spirit of “Get out of here you silly goose!”

saltnotsugar,

There was no rail accident comrade, or dare you suggest otherwise?

saltnotsugar,

Is also explains the great speed…scientifically.

saltnotsugar,

In prison.

Butthole destroyed.

Make check on coin.

Massive loss in value.

No.

saltnotsugar,

DS9 does need more beef jerky scenes.

saltnotsugar,

Space Bucees! Much like regular Bucees but floating around in space!

saltnotsugar,

More eyelashes. More. Okay, I think you’re hearing, “Give me a lot of lashes.” What I mean is GIMMY ALL THE EYELASHES BABY!

saltnotsugar,

This error is brought to you by MEGA BURGER!

saltnotsugar,

(Rings hand bell) Drugs! Get ya drugs!

“Hey! These aren’t drugs. These are lollipops.”

I can see YOU my friend, know your drugs.

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