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shalafi, to memes in Oh nooo

I say “gracias” all the time. But now I’m wondering…

Went to the local Mexican joint, waiter started talking to my Filipina wife in Spanish. She gamely answered back with a word or two, was obviously confused.

Now I’m scared that people will think I’m mistaking them for Mexican when I toss out a word or two.

Just to fuck with my wife; She was talking to a friend in Tagalog when I walked in the kitchen.

“Hey! It’s $friend on the phone! Say hi!”

“Nǐhǎo.”

shalafi, to comicstrips in Something on the wing [Tyler Hendrix]

I’m guessing no one gets this one?

“Nightmare at 20,000 Feet” - The Twilight Zone

www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXHKDb0CNjA

shalafi, to memes in I need to buy better band-aids

These are the shit:

band-aid.com/…/hydro-seal-all-purpose-bandages

I can go on forever, but they do more than just stick well.

You can get hydrocolloid bandages from other makers, But Band Aid is the best.

shalafi, to lemmyshitpost in Me IRL

My first wife didn’t make her son eat anything he didn’t want, but he had to try it, once. Worked out.

It was sometime around then that I learned, and realized, that kids have different taste buds. They make Oscar Meyer wieners bland on purpose.

My kids? Scrawny little fucks won’t eat anything. At all. I don’t know how they function. It’s like hugging tiny skeletons. But, that was me as a little kid. All the adults frustrated as hell with me.

shalafi, to lemmyshitpost in Lemmy world irl meet up footage 2024
shalafi, to lemmyshitpost in *Sigh*, unzips

This is my hole! It was made for me!

shalafi, (edited ) to memes in They’re the same

This look MAGA to you OP?

Pictured:

  • /r/liberalgunowners patch
  • Ukraine patch
  • Imperial Storm Trooper AR-15 (OK, you kinda got me on that one.)
  • wife’s Christmas present (hot pink Bersa Thunder .380)
  • Pilipino flag
  • 20-yo hat, bought before assholes took over the flag
  • 20-round mag, kinda prefer the 10s, standard 30s are a bit much for reasons

Not pictured:

OK, the crushed Keystone cans scream redneck, but not MAGA.

To top it off, that’s in Florida, where it’s perfectly OK to paint us with a fat “conservative asshole who deserves whatever happens to them” brush.

And 01/06 gave me fucking PTSD thank you very fucking much. And I don’t say that lightly.

(Glad I took a minute on this post! Found some cool new patches.)

shalafi, (edited ) to memes in They’re the same

When I was dating, I laughingly told a girl I was “kinda redneck”.

“Uh, exactly how redneck?”

“I loathe Trump and don’t start me on January 6th. If that’s what you’re asking.”

“Whew. Just checking.”

shalafi, to asklemmy in Is there a forum for people who are lonely and sad but specifically not incel sickos?

I feel you on all that, I really do. Guess my brain responded to bullying by going the other way, fighting to learn socials skills to make it stop. I’m old BTW, we might have different definitions of “bullying”. Mine definition is; “getting the shit kicked out of you daily at school, while the teachers watch or participate, and/or being constantly on the lookout to avoid said ass beatings”. All that to say, I get you.

Anyhow, you might not like this take, but going outside is probably your answer. I know how facile that sounds, but you’re not going to make any sort of meaningful human connection with a keyboard.

What does “going outside” look like for you? I got no idea, but I got experience. If you like, DM me and I’ll give you my email or phone number. Hell, maybe we can help motivate each other.

shalafi, to memes in Taking for granted

I laugh at people bitching about their pay. Move. On. Why would the company suddenly throw you a 20% raise!? Out of the goodness of their heart?

My last 3 jobs (top pay): $14 -> $22 -> $39. At this point I could probably jump ship for more but I’m quite content to retire out of this place.

Stay put 3-5 years, gain experience, jump. When we moved here my buddy took a job at an oil change place, barely above min wage and far below his skillset. Kept job hopping and now he’s making $120K+.

shalafi, to memes in Skirts are breezy and comfortable. Fuck off.

Shout out to my skinny guys: Girl clothes are cut for us, especially at the waist. Hoodies and jackets are the bomb. Try it. Wife about shit when I strapped on my new women’s jacket. “OH! SO sexy!”

Got plenty of casual clothes given to me by exes. That’s how I learned.

Buttons and zippers on the “wrong” side are a pain, still worth it.

(For context: I’m a middle-aged, white guy living in the South. No one so much as blinks.)

shalafi, to memes in Skirts are breezy and comfortable. Fuck off.

Shout out to my skinny guys: Girl clothes are cut for us, especially at the waist. Hoodies and jackets are the bomb. Try it. Wife about shit when I strapped on my new women’s jacket. “OH! SO sexy!”

Got plenty of casual clothes given to me by exes. That’s how I learned.

Buttons and zippers on the “wrong” side are a pain, still worth it.

(For context: I’m a middle-aged, white guy living in the South. No one so much as blinks.)

shalafi, to lemmyshitpost in You ask too much of him

Would you ever really want to see an angel?

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EChBRIF7BU

shalafi, to memes in Sometime relatable

And or being overweight. Took me awhile to figure out why people started talking about pains starting in their 30s.

shalafi, to memes in Gold for house

Jesus. Got my house 7-years ago on a Habitat for Humanity mortgage, for which you pay cost. ~85K? Also, no interest on the loan. Also, no property tax.

3-bed/2-bath/80’x200’ lot/1,140sq. ft. living space/$550mo.

Call your local Habitat chapter, go to the next meeting and learn. Keep going with the program if you can. Took my ex-wife and I 14-months, start to finish.

I can’t tell you the qualifications, they change and are different from one area to the next. I can give you some basic answers, at least I’ll try.

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