In mythology, Uranus (or Ouranos) is the son AND husband of Gaia (Earth). They had 18 kids together, but he hated having kids, so he hid the kids inside Gaia… in a cave I guess, presumably not the same cave he was having sex with. In response, she gave the youngest, Cronus, a magic sickle and he castrated Ouranos. So somehow, despite 63 Earths being able to fit inside Uranus, Uranus managed to fit himself inside of Earth at least 18 times.
It’s also crazy that astronomers didn’t go with the objectively cooler ‘Ouranos’ spelling of the name, and instead went with the ‘Your Anus’ spelling.
presumably not the same cave he was having sex with
It was exactly the same cave he was having sex with. He refused to remove his penis to prevent their children from leaving the womb cave, so Kronos had to castrate Ouranos so they could emerge.
I’ll tell you what not to put in there: Christmas decorations. They break easy and it can cause a mess. Don’t want to pollute all of Uranus’ non-solid core with glass shards.
See it even sounds sexual when I clearly make it about the planet
The problem isn’t that our parts wear out. The problem is that most critical ones aren’t easily replaceable and the most important one is designed specifically to not be removable.
You might be tempted, like I was, because sometimes this kind of thing is a trope and the link actually shows cute images. It does for the first page, but as soon as you scroll you’ll see actually horrible shit.
This is not a cutesy plot twist it-was-cute-after-all, there’s some sick shit. Just skip the curiosity on this one.
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