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whaleross, in "If I knew then what I know now" by Port Sherry
@whaleross@lemmy.world avatar

Is this an option?

computergeek125, in "Pet" by Sarah Andersen

Wasn’t there a subreddit for Cat Distribution System?

RIP_Cheems, (edited ) in "Pet" by Sarah Andersen
@RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world avatar

You will take the cat AND LIKE IT

lvxferre, in "Pet" by Sarah Andersen
@lvxferre@lemmy.ml avatar

That’s practically what happened with Siegfrieda (my cat) and me.

Long story short: a stray hid herself in my garage. She was beaten, bleeding and pregnant, so I rushed her to the vet. “I don’t want another pet, we’re going to fix her up and find her a new home.” Seven years later, she’s still here.

illi,

we’re going to fix her up and find her a new home

… and you did exactly that!

logicbomb, in "If I knew then what I know now" by Port Sherry

If he didn’t exist, then he wouldn’t be able to tell himself anything, which violates causality.

The only thing you can say to your younger self is the same thing that was previously said to your younger self by your older self. Although then you’d have the issue of where did the information come from.

xspurnx,

Which is why the Vulcan Science Directorate has determined time travel is impossible.

MrNesser,

That only tracks if you don’t consider that by giving the information to his younger self he doesn’t spawn a new time line.

logicbomb,

If he spawned a new time line then he wouldn’t have to disappear.

usualsuspect191,

The information comes from the set of lake houses that his grandfather had. I might’ve partially slept through that lecture.

joyjoy,

The information came from the timeline that no longer has a you because you moved to a different timeline.

Fredselfish,
@Fredselfish@lemmy.world avatar

That’s what I think time travel would truly be like. Yes you can travel back and time and change the past but when you go back to your present nothing would have changed.

Because once you change the past you start a separate timeline.

joyjoy,

It gets really complex when your time traveling triggers an infinite time loop that you personally never experienced.

Example: You go back in time to warn yourself about a coming war or disaster, but you get interrupted before you can finish, so your other self panics and disaster proofs everything, unwittingly preventing the disaster. When the “war or disaster” never happens, you feel silly and stressed, so you go back in time to tell yourself not to worry so much.

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

You’d have the original timeline where you experienced the disaster, another one where you were warned by your previous self and didn’t experience it, and a third one where you were told by your future self not to worry about it and experienced it. If you kept this up you’d create infinite timelines unless Loki culled them or something.

joyjoy,

If you got interrupted while warning about the disaster, what makes you think you wouldn’t be interrupted while saying not to worry?

samus12345,
@samus12345@lemmy.world avatar

If you remember what interrupted your future self you might be able to prevent it from happening again.

joyjoy,

You. The person who interrupted you was yourself.

ninja,

With a branching timelines theory you don’t create loops you create cascades. Since you can’t make changes to an existing timeline you create a new timeline every time you go back. You would end up spawning an infinite number of timelines.

VindictiveJudge,
@VindictiveJudge@lemmy.world avatar

The comic follows Back to the Future time travel rules, which are weird. It’s generally pretty consistent, aside from a bit with Biff, but overall it’s a big ball of wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey… stuff.

ThatWeirdGuy1001, in "If I knew then what I know now" by Port Sherry
@ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world avatar

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more infuriating way to express whispering.

droning_in_my_ears,

I kept zooming in trying to decipher it

blanketswithsmallpox,

It’s just highly jpeged dick butts…

RGB3x3, (edited ) in "Pet" by Sarah Andersen

Nobody buys or adopts cats. They just show up to your house one day expecting food, you feed it, and it sticks around.

Everyone knows that.

Aecosthedark,

Just like coathangers

palordrolap,

"I can't AFFORD to keep FEEDING all these COATHANGERS! There's so MANY!! What can I DO?!? AAAAAAA!!!!"

Aecosthedark,

I thought coathangers fed themselves with one half of a pair of socks? I can’t think of another explanation for the odd socks i keep ending up with.

palordrolap,

It's washing machines and dryers that find socks delicious.

... which is less of a joke than you'd think. Small items can get partially forced between the rubber seal and the drum and then when the drum rotates, the item is slurped outside like a strand of spaghetti.

Also sometimes identical-looking socks that get paired together by the manufacturers eventually drift in appearance because they were from separate dye batches, leaving the owner with a pair of odd socks.

The other other explanation is the sock gnomes. We don't talk about the sock gnomes.

MargotRobbie, in "Me time" by MrLovenstein
@MargotRobbie@lemmy.world avatar

Hey, they were a sad therapist, just like me!

Except I was a clown therapist.

einlander,

Haha, just like Pagliacci

Lepsea, (edited )

Do you end the session with a honk honk from your nose?

MargotRobbie,
@MargotRobbie@lemmy.world avatar

Course not, puddin’.

oce,
@oce@jlai.lu avatar

Chiropractor, osteopath, reflexolog, naturopath or homeopath?

jaybone,

Reflexolog sounds like a prescription drug name I see on tv commercials. Maybe for like constipation or something. And they could show slow motion clips of logs flowing down a stream or something.

MargotRobbie,
@MargotRobbie@lemmy.world avatar

The one with a baseball bat.

match, in Hop in bed [Extra Fabulous Comics]
@match@pawb.social avatar

Honestly incredible that this joke has taken 40 years to happen

can,

There’s no way it has.

kadotux,

“Lmao it’s 25 years old at mo…” “Oh…”

lurch, in "If I knew then what I know now" by Port Sherry

I know a few people who would erase themselves like that without a second thought 🤣 😥

killeronthecorner, in "Me time" by MrLovenstein
@killeronthecorner@lemmy.world avatar

The therapist only exists in their mind, and they have a narcissistic personality disorder

Fiivemacs, in Hop in bed [Extra Fabulous Comics]

Be better if it was a toonie and he popped the middle of it and gave the camera a sexual Mario look

wisemanzero, in "If I knew then what I know now" by Port Sherry

But you must! How else would they know to shopsaf sosalarbdlmgre sofasdpsd dsflasos sdfasd afsdfasops?

superduperenigma, in "Me time" by MrLovenstein

FYI, MrLovenstein is also on Mastodon.

MrLovenstein@mastodon.social

b00m, in "Me time" by MrLovenstein
@b00m@kbin.social avatar

That'll be $300

lurch,

Oof, better move to a country where it’s free (yeah, those exist)

Perfide, (edited )

Moving to said country, however, is not free.

lurch,

Ayy, it’s the old “you need money to save money” problem.

RealFknNito,
@RealFknNito@lemmy.world avatar

Or a functioning political system that represents the majority of people. Like a true democracy or something.

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