Congratulations on having something that helped your life. That’s honestly great. But come on you have to admit they manage to find a way to mess up your personal time. Like clockwork my daughter will start waking up/have a nightmare/want attention/etc a few min after I get time to read/study/game/Netflix/etc…
That’s temporary. Kids grow, they age, they mature. After a while, you start to learn more from them than they do from you.
Then they grow up and leave, they don’t need you anymore. I haven’t gotten there yet, and I’m both excited and afraid. But one day, if you love them, and if you prepare them, they will return the favor. They’ll be there when you grow old. They’ll be there to support you, as you were them.
The “kids suck” mentality is true, I agree, kids suck. But they only suck if you have a very narrow view on your and their lives.
Kids who have supportive parents will always need their parents even if they leave and are self sufficient. I’m sure your kiddos will still need you for a long time.
I’m not who you were replying to, but I wanted to voice that I’m in the narrow-minded “kids suck” camp. I’m too selfish to be a great parent, so I’ve elected to not be a parent at all. I’d be okay, maybe even good at it, but I’m all too aware of the freedom and the financial stability I’d be giving up to be a parent, and for that I know that I’d resent my child for taking that from me even if I consciously tried not to.
I have other additional reasons, but the strongest reason is that I like the ability to take my wife on spontaneous trips to wherever or just shut down and focus on myself. Parents can’t do that, at least not whenever they feel like it.
That all goes out the window once you have kids though. You can’t plan diaper blowouts, motion sickness induced car cleanup, meltdowns, suddenly needing endless snacks, ripping off all their clothes and refusing to get dressed, hiding their shoes, hiding your shoes, hiding your keys, napping late, napping early, … I could go on.
But then you’re likely meeting up with other parents, and they get it, too. So it’s not a big deal again. When a parent says they’ll be there (with kiddos), they’ll likely be somewhere between on time and an hour late.
Being a parent is irrelevant. All you have to do is text and say sorry this happened, be proactive not reactive. Something makes you late? Warn people you’ll be late so they can get started without waiting around for you.
Yeah, of course. You text when you leave to say how late you’re running, lol.
But you also never make plans to meet at a spot where kiddos can’t play. Doesn’t really matter exactly when you show up at a park or to a playdate at someone’s house, right?
Uh no. It matters. If you tell someone you’re going to be somewhere at a specific time, then it is rude to not be there at that time. The only way to make it okay is to call ahead and warn them that you will be late.
Even with a playdate like you said, the other parent may have food ready. They may have declined a different activity so they could meet with you. They may have left early from a different event, or even they were enjoying a TV program but stopped early to go meet with you. All of which if you would have called to say you’ll be late they could have continued. It doesn’t matter that you were meeting at a park, you put their life on hold for it, respect that they did that for you.
You have kids. Learn how to be on time, you’re supposed to be the one who can manage the time for them, not use them as an excuse.
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