@Kolanaki@yiffit.net
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Kolanaki

@Kolanaki@yiffit.net

I’m just a weird, furry, pan guy (cis he/him). I also have a big, blue username.

Currently on Earth for 8 years ensuring steps to unite humanity and usher us into the galactic civilization just so I can see my boyfriend again.

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Kolanaki, (edited )
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I’ve had truly instant ramen when my friend’s brother came back from Japan. Dude brought a bunch of cool shit back, including a few cases of self heating ramen and a carton of self lighting cigarettes. Japan is like 500 years in the future.

Kolanaki, (edited )
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I never took music theory either… 🤔

Maybe I should find a class on it, just for the sake of learning it. Personally, I don’t really see the point other than that. I’m of the mind that you can create good music without knowing jack about it. Just start making sounds that make you feel things. Eventually you’ll make a banger; even if you’re the only one who thinks so.

Kolanaki, (edited )
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SLPT: Get depression! You’ll lose all interest in most things, instantly cutting spending on those things by 100%!

Kolanaki,
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They stop doing it often because it gets homeless people coming to the store specifically to return carts that people didn’t return so they can collect the refund.

Kolanaki, (edited )
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It’s probably even worse:

“Ew these dirty bums are scaring away customers and I might lose money. This must be stopped IMMEDIATELY!”

Kolanaki,
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Wait… Is it giving the mice yogurt that makes them sexy, or is it like beer goggles and eating yogurt makes you think mice are sexy? 🤔

Kolanaki,
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“I can change him!”

Kolanaki, (edited )
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My state’s flag not only has toes, it has bear feet.

Kolanaki,
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Nah, she fat AF

Kolanaki, (edited )
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It’s kind of a big list. Mostly actors and filmmakers, but also game designers and developers and executive producers. Some of the biggest pieces of shit have played a role in some great movies and other artistic projects. 🤷🏻‍♂️

What is Something Scientific that you just don't believe in at all?

EDIT: Let’s cool it with the downvotes, dudes. We’re not out to cut funding to your black hole detection chamber or revoke the degrees of chiropractors just because a couple of us don’t believe in it, okay? Chill out, participate with the prompt and continue with having a nice day. I’m sure almost everybody has something...

Kolanaki,
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Right?

It’s more of an egg shape.

Kolanaki,
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As an ordained Dudist Priest, I agree.

Kolanaki, (edited )
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I always wanted a Trek series that followed humans that were not part of the Federation. Maybe Maquis. Maybe characters more like Firefly’s. Just in that universe and not bound to the rules and regulations we already know about through the other series.

Prodigy almost fits, except that the kids are aspiring to be like Starfleet so they are still following their rules and regulations… Mostly. Plus they’re being guided by a holographic version of Janeway.

Kolanaki,
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Every damn day.

Kolanaki, (edited )
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During standardized testing, because I hated math, I always just bubbled in my answers at random on the Scantron and still got average marks for it like half the time.

Later in high school I also learned that in a multiple choice questionnaire, C is the most commonly correct answer so if you just answer C on everything your odds of getting a passing grade are pretty high. Legit were told to just answer C when we didn’t know in a class preparing us for an academic decathlon.

Kolanaki,
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Nintendo’s litigation department begins vibrating intensely

Kolanaki,
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Anyone who claims the Bible is the “greatest story ever told” has never heard the story of Gilgamesh.

Kolanaki,
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“Being an orphan was good enough for me, it should be good enough for my son!”

Kolanaki,
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Anyone who has ever listened to Tribute knows that they never recorded The Greatest Song in the World and they can’t even remember how it goes.

Kolanaki,
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Hugh Mon.

Kolanaki,
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It should be Taco Bell instead.

Weapon of Ass Destruction

Kolanaki,
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Me when someone is poking me and I have a stuffy nose.

Kolanaki,
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To fake the moon landing, the government hired Stanley Kubrick. Kubrick, being a perfectionist, made it look real by filming on location.

Kolanaki, (edited )
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I always thought that game was just a Lights-Out toy, but with multiple faces and not just a single board.

Kolanaki, (edited )
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Instead of playing Scrooge, Data should been the ghost of Christmas past.

The cybernetic ghost of Christmas past from the future.

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