asklemmy

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Lells, in You can have any superpower, but the first person to reply chooses a side effect
@Lells@kbin.social avatar

Can spontaneously manifest any variety of cheese

DuckCake,
@DuckCake@kbin.social avatar

It appears from a random bodily orifice each time, and never the same one twice.

theusualuser,

Lactose intollerant

JustAWoopie,

Cheese becomes tasteless

Unblended,
@Unblended@kbin.social avatar

Can't control when you do it.

VanillaGorilla,

Oh I'd pick up some napkins and follow that person. I hope blue cheeses are on the list, and maybe some gruyère 🤤

khelmr,
@khelmr@kbin.social avatar

You're constantly followed by an army of mice that want to eat your cheese.

glasslyrata,
@glasslyrata@mander.xyz avatar

At the rate of one gram per hour.

Jon-H558,

You constantly stink of molding cheese

fubo, in What do you think of people making memes/jokes about the recent Titan tragedy?

Did these folks make fun of Kobe Bryant and his daughter?

1337tux,
@1337tux@lemmy.world avatar

No? Sorry for my ignorance, but I don't understand what this has to do with the question I asked. Do you mind to elaborate? I'm serious and I'm not trying to act like dickhead, so sorry if I have offended someone.

seriousslayerguy,

Kobe - helicopter - ded

1337tux,
@1337tux@lemmy.world avatar

Yeah I know that, but I don't get it how this is related to some people making fun of couple billionaires losing their lives in pretty horrible way. And again sorry if I offend someone

seriousslayerguy,

He was just making a reference about people laughing at dead people. Simple as that.

badgerific, in You can have any superpower, but the first person to reply chooses a side effect
@badgerific@kbin.social avatar

Ability to successfully persuade any living being to do what I want them to do.

skillissuer,

it requires days of careful observation of that living being at least to prepare persuasion speech. the speech takes entire day even for simplest tasks and you can't do virtually anything else by sheer intensity required

ivanafterall,
@ivanafterall@kbin.social avatar

Your entire family was murdered in a dark city alley to lead to your powers.

SevFTW,

Damn the last time that happened I only inherited immense wealth and used it to beat up street level criminals

theusualuser,

Don't worry, he'll convince a genius to create a time machine. Problem solved.

Jon-H558,

You are never truly sure again if people are actually listening to you or even like you or they are just enchanted by your power. You are never again able to form meaningful relationships with that doubt in you mind, you can never find true love and become a recluse.

FanfictionConsort, in I need to survive for 3 days while pooping as much as possible. I can pee as often as I like. It can take up loads of space. What food do I pack?
@FanfictionConsort@kbin.social avatar

I have a good option here: Dairy.

Basically, your body can only produce so much Lactase (the thing that breaks down Lactose) at a time. Lactose intolerant people barely produce any Lactase, which is why eating a tiny bit of cheese is OK for them, but they'll explosively shit themselves if they have a glass of milk.

Anyways, you have a lactase limit, time to find it. An added bonus of this strategy is that your options are a bit more varied: You can load up on cheeses, milkshakes, cream puffs, cheesecake. Regular old milk has the most lactose though, so if you want to shit yourself plentifully and violently, bring a ton of that (and whatever other foods you want, the milk will do the work here). Just don't try and chug a whole gallon of milk in under 20 minutes, you'll vomit because it will dilute your stomach acid until instead of digesting it, it'll curdle in your stomach.

ErgodicTangle,

Thanks I hate vomozarella.

Mugmoor,
@Mugmoor@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

I'll just leave this here... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kqbvu8jZBOw

MajorMajormajormajor,

Jesus Christ. I'm glad that video is only in 480p, somethings don't need to be in 4k.

j_erasmo, in What do you think of people making memes/jokes about the recent Titan tragedy?

Most of what I have seen on the meme communities I follow have been par-and-course with what I expected to see on internet. Although I agree that it is morally wrong to joke with malintent when someone passes, I think humor is a normal response to tragedy. As long as the memes aren't egregious about it, then they still get a chuckle out of me and help me feel better about the situation.

vercimusart, in You can have any superpower, but the first person to reply chooses a side effect
@vercimusart@kbin.social avatar

Ability to phase through non-Newtonian fluids as if they were regular Newtonian fluids.

DarkenLM,

All fluids you touch turn into mercury.

VanillaGorilla,

Side effect: Newtonian fluids change their behaviour to that of non Newtonian fluids and you can't pass any of them in a hurry. You can run on water now though.

vercimusart,
@vercimusart@kbin.social avatar

Running on goopy water sounds great, but hydration might become an issue if I have to eat water like it’s non-Newtonian pudding

VanillaGorilla,

You can still drink, it just takes some time. Forget straws.

CanadaPlus,

Air is a fluid, though.

VanillaGorilla,

Makes the running on water a tiny bit harder

CanadaPlus,

On the other hand, maybe you could fly somehow.

VanillaGorilla,

That would explain the cloud levels in Super Mario.

lurkeymclerkface,

You are now no longer able to pass through newtonian fluids at all.

heartlessevil, in What are some good ways to cure boredom while indoors?

Do you have other ways to get around? Maybe moving to a place that does? I realize I'm not answering your question, but there's only so much fun you can have indoors by yourself all the time. You'll end up feeling bored eventually no matter what. You specifically mentioned that outside is scary, which I think is the core problem here. Doing some exposure therapy by yourself or with guidance from a therapist could help.

Lauchs, in What do you think of people making memes/jokes about the recent Titan tragedy?

Personally, I think it's all about the balance.

There are a handful of affected families and millions cracking their own jokes. No one (hopefully!) is harassing the victims' families.

Admittedly, my moral perspective is, apparently, a little skewed. I find it mind boggling that we as a culture have normalized sweatshops to make almost everything and children mining and dying to make our phones but draw the line at jokes. Just seems weird, like a plantation slave owner chiding me for saying "damn."

dan1101, in What do you think of people making memes/jokes about the recent Titan tragedy?
@dan1101@lemmy.world avatar

Humor about this tragic event is sub-optimal. We don't want to sink this sub with poorly thought out humor.

Akasazh,
@Akasazh@feddit.nl avatar

/c/im19andthisisdeep

Imbrock, in Does anyone else hope the bulk of Reddit stays there?

I think Reddit will slowly bleed users as the experience gets worse but it won't collapse altogether. It's not likely that any one service will replace it but I could see a series of successors come about eventually.

hoodlem,

I agree. I see it as becoming like Slashdot. Making ad revenue but deserted by the core people who made the site what it was.

AnonTwo, in Does anyone else hope the bulk of Reddit stays there?

Not really. I feel like it's not healthy for any community if all the people you don't like aren't there to offer their viewpoint. The more you build an echo chamber with no dissenting opinions, the more extreme it becomes and the less it's able to deal with things that clash with it's ideals. The less it's involved with things that clash with it's ideals.

-This does not include groups with completely bad faith arguments that are clearly racist bigots.

MrsDoyle,

I don't mind discussing stuff with people who have different views from me, but on Reddit I would mostly type out a comment, imagine what kind of rude retort I'd get, and trash the draft. I remember some years back having a great back and forth with someone on nuclear power and actually changing my mind! But more recently it's just "you're wrong and dumb", no discussion. Ugh.

I'm still very new here, but it feels like Reddit used to, and I like it.

dogmuffins,

You’re right in a way, but I think you’re applying a narrow definition of “opinion” when I think most people ITT are thinking about “behaviours”.

Sure, it’s not great to exclude dissenting political opinions, the intolerance paradox being a notable exception. That said, I’m not here to discuss politics.

Say for example that some users will do anything for fake internet points - post anything, say anything, there behaviour is guided by the pursuit of karma and building some kind of following. Other users will do anything for engagement, whatever it takes to get others to engage with them including trolling. I’m happy enough for these types of users to find more rewarding platforms elsewhere. Note that’s different to excluding them, it’s just being a part of a place that isn’t fertile ground for their fixations.

badgerific, in I need to survive for 3 days while pooping as much as possible. I can pee as often as I like. It can take up loads of space. What food do I pack?
@badgerific@kbin.social avatar

Come over. I'm sure I can cook you some diarrhea-inducing food. It'll be spicy as hell, so sweating and peeing gets sorted too. And I'm sure it's not going to be easy to find.

SpaceNoodle, in Why is a millennium old fossilised human poop on display at the Archaeological Resource Centre in the UK?

Why wouldn't it be? It provides fascinating insight into the dietary and hygienic habits of our precursors.

Kaizo107, in You can have any superpower, but the first person to reply chooses a side effect
@Kaizo107@kbin.social avatar

Good ol' invisibility

npastaSyn,

Only works when no one is looking at you... and when you're naked.

CopernicusQwark,

Mystery Men!

khelmr,
@khelmr@kbin.social avatar

You need to wear a ring to use it, and undead monsters hunting for the ring will instantly know where you are. It may or may not have a mind of its own convincing you to never part ways with it.

Grumlin,
@Grumlin@kbin.social avatar

This sounds like my kind of movie.

npastaSyn,

Can probably make a trilogy out of it... maybe even a franchise.

nichty,

Maybe even a prequel trilogy?

Jon-H558,

I give it to sam

MeowdyPardner, in You can have any superpower, but the first person to reply chooses a side effect
@MeowdyPardner@kbin.social avatar

The ability to nullify side effects :) I'll be rich as a doctor

1st,

You no longer have any side effects, only things intentionally done will happen. You must now consciously think about breathing and blinking as they are no longer side effects of being alive. As this is not a side effect, but rather the effect itself it cannot be nullified.

DarkenLM,

Oh shit, bro has to manually pump this blood. Well, he's fucked.

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