Best thing my daddy taught me; no matter how confident you are, you could always be wrong. Brains are just unreliable sometimes. Sky is blue? Could be wrong. You’re N years old? Probably… but you could be wrong.
Accepting this allows one to improve. Best we can do is recognize this, and try our best to minimize how often we’re wrong.
This has allowed me to withhold confidence in many situations. Not in deference, but in thoughtful acceptance that I truly might be wrong.
That really warms my heart to hear. I’m trying to be one of the good dads.
Just today my 9 year old and I had a conversation about how I’m always the first to step up and admit when I make a mistake, and communicate what I did or will do to fix it, where I have colleagues who will try to hide their mistakes and front like they never ever make them. Going so far as lying to clients, bosses, and coworkers all the way.
The problem with this is the quiet nihilism baked into it, which is the same reason so many people believe that widely supported science could be wrong.
In the absolute sense, it is true. Though things like “the sky is blue” is more about linguistics, but for a layperson it’s kind of inconsequential either way. While there is a small possibility that scientific consensus could be wrong, there is orders of magnitude bigger chance that unwarranted skepticism is dangerous. Reality does exist, regardless of how much epistemology you choose to wave away.
I don’t think so, and he and I have discussed this in epistemological terms several times over the years. “Sky is blue” example was probably bad as would have been “earth is round” etc. The point isn’t that anything can be wrong, though strictly speaking, I guess it can. What we mean is precisely that our minds have the ability to mislead us and powerfully so. But part of the drive to minimize that is to understand the value of consensus in both scientific communities and wider communities.
To have the best ratio of things about which were correct vs incorrect, being confident in things like the outcome of refereed science is helpful.
So, to update, I notice when shes laying sprawled out on a blanket on my lap she has an almost permanent slight tensing contraction on the breath in. Like a fish’s gills or like its very rapid/jerky on the in-breath, I think
The thing is… the “OEM” Dell replacement batteries have a ridiculous price… they’re like 2 or 3 times more expensive than 3rd party ones for a refurbished one…
There’s a reason why they cost that much. If it costs 2x as much but lasts 5x as long then what’s the better value?
I’ve never gotten a chinese knockoff battery that comes even close to the same endurance as an OEM battery. Even used ones will last longer on a charge and hold their capacity longer than knockoffs. Plus you don’t run the risk of the batteries expanding and causing a fire.
Parts-people.com specializes in dell parts and even lets you put in your serial number to make sure you’re getting compatible parts. I’ve used them at least a dozen times for work.
I got deeply into this (genre?) when I burned out on a combination of playing big/tough games and the stresses of life. I also enjoyed the pace of Outer Wilds and Subnautica. Some other favourites:
Supraland 1/2 (low combat, light hearted metroidvania, I loved it)
Psychonauts 2 (amazing adventure game, big but not hard. I loved collecting everything, it was a great balance)
Tinykin (similar adventure, a bit like Pikmin, which is also great. Lots of chilled collecting)
Spiritfarer (lots of freedom, loose plot, not overwhelming)
Breath of the Wild (do what you want, very nice discovery elements)
TOEM, A Short Hike, GRIS and Cocoon (light adventure / puzzle games, peaceful but could be boring if you want action)
Yokus Island Express (lovely metroidvania, chilled gameplay, not overwhelming)
It Takes two (humour, light combat - played with my young son)
Unravel 1/2 (easy-ish puzzles)
Weirdly, I found Sniper Elite 4/5 fairly chill, lots of scoping out areas
Overcooked 2 (zero stress if you play practice mode a ton before attempting a level. I found it a very zen/flow game)
Peggle 1/2 (can be frustrating, but is very low stakes and arcadey. Lovely for short sessions)
Wilmots Warehouse (can be stressful if you take the timer seriously, but I loved all the organising. Very satisfying)
Vampire Survivors (can get a bit much, but pretty simple and disposable)
There are tons more, I deal with a lot of anxiety!
Some games I was recommended for this purpose that didn’t land for me:
Powerwash sim / other simulators (these feel like a second job for me. Constant grind and focus on perfection wasn’t helpful)
Tetris Evolution / Lumines (either gets too fast / hard, or gets boring)
Stardew / Terraria (in theory these look great, but I find huge sandboxes too overwhelming. Always feels like I should be doing more stuff / doing it better)
Roguelikes (I like Hades, Dead Cells, etc, but they’re very stressful and frustrating when so much hinges on survival)
Finally, I’d suggest trying a solo board game. More tactile and relaxing alternative to screen time.
Especially in the winter,I like to fire up The Long Dark. I put on the exploration setting where the wildlife doesn’t attack. You still have to deal with the need for food and warmth, so there are still stakes. Just not the anxiety inducing animal attacks. There’s a sort of bleak beauty to the game.
I just realized, if there was ever a wildlife photography mode in that game, I would play the shit out of it. RP-ing as an ‘extreme’ wildlife photographer trying to shoot around blizzards and keeping your gear in working order would be a really cool way to shake up the gameplay. Would easily get another 200 hours of play out of me.
I encounter that all the time especially on public forums like this. This is a quote from an article I found about it online: According to psychologist, speaker and author Guy Winch, most people who consistently refuse to admit they're wrong do so because they have incredibly fragile egos. They clam up and insist they're right, demonstrating what experts term "psychological rigidity", as a defense mechanism.
Also I think that telling someone they are wrong comes across as a criticism about their intellect and they respond defensively by instinct. And, another reason is because people don't want to believe anything that contradicts their preferred view of the world. So if you "correct" someone they tend to act like you're attacking them or as too stupid to know what "truth" is.
It's really a telling distinction because today, most people behave in this defensive way. You don't see many people willing to concede or say, "wow that's a different point of view than I have considered, maybe it requires me to spend some thought on why I feel the way I do." Which is the real value of differing opinions; they help us re-assess and redefine the reasons why we feel the way we do.
It cant help that especially online it seems incredibly rare for someone to point out that you are wrong politely, gently and informatively. Who wants to admit they are wrong to someone who informs you via “OMG you dumb fuck…”
That's also true. How can you not be defensive when someone's reply starts with, "listen here you stupid dumbfuck....." Of course that kind of name calling is going to result in a verbal fight. I don't know why we can't just say, "OK I disagree but here's why, and I hope you'll appreciate my feedback." Do we have to resort to calling each other juvenile names? A person isn't stupid just because they have a controversial point of view.
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